Nobody Wants To Say This… But It’s True 😬

0:00 Who is the most beautiful race in South Africa?

0:04 Voting results came out.

0:06 White people won the vote.

0:08 It's Cape Town.

0:12 What was more interesting was the dynamic of the voting

0:15 because what happened was the white people voted for themselves.

0:19 Yeah.

0:21 The black people also voted for themselves.

0:24 Colored people voted for themselves,

0:26 but then half of them voted for white people.

0:30 No, not half of them.

0:31 There's no joke there.

0:32 Just Just move on.

0:33 Not half.

0:34 Like just half.

0:34 Like the number.

0:35 Not Hey, go away.

0:36 Go away.

0:37 Brought your own jokes to the show.

0:38 Go away.

0:40 And that's how white people won.

0:41 Yeah.

0:42 Now, I've got two problems with this competition.

0:47 First of all, it's a tiny bit Naziish.

0:52 The most beautiful race.

0:54 Really?

0:55 The most It's a slippery slope.

0:56 You got to be careful.

0:57 What's next?

0:57 Huh?

0:58 the least needed raceh.

1:00 You got to be careful.

1:02 And the second problem I have with this is the conclusion itself.

1:06 How could anyone make such a decision?

1:08 There's no such thing as the most beautiful race.

1:10 All women of every race can be beautiful.

1:12 There's no such thing as the most beautiful

1:14 race because facially every woman has different features.

1:17 You can be beautiful no matter what race you are.

1:18 Yeah, women all can have beautiful faces.

1:20 Women can all have beautiful boobs.

1:21 That's just the standard thing, you know.

1:23 All women of every race can be beautiful.

1:25 Yeah.

1:25 And I know some of you are sitting there now going, "Ah, Trevor, yeah,

1:27 but I've never seen a beautiful Aborigin." Yeah, but you know what you say?

1:30 You say, "Yet." That's what you say yet.

1:32 Cuz you haven't seen all of them, right?

1:34 And plus, it's not always about looks.

1:35 Yeah.

1:36 Maybe Aboriginal women do special things.

1:37 Yes.

1:38 Maybe they'll just like jump on top of you and just be like, you don't know.

1:53 But all women of every race can be beautiful.

1:57 There's just differences amongst them.

1:58 That's why I feel sorry for people

2:00 that don't that don't go out there and explore.

2:02 You know, you know how many people out

2:03 there that can't find someone of another race attractive.

2:06 I feel so sad for them.

2:08 I've got friends like that.

2:09 Can't find other races attractive, black and white.

2:12 My friend Barry always bust himself.

2:13 He was just the weirdest things.

2:14 He used to be like, "Trev, bro." It's like,

2:16 "I saw Beyonce at the MTV Awards last night.

2:18 Eh, did you see it?" "Yeah, yeah, I saw it, bro.

2:20 She's hot." E like, "Yeah, she's hot." Like, yeah.

2:24 Like, if there was if there was one that I'd do it with, eh, one singer, brew.

2:35 One singer.

2:35 Yeah.

2:35 One singer, Brew.

2:37 A Why would you not want to explore?

2:43 So many options out there.

2:45 So many different things you get, you know?

2:47 I just don't understand the white the most beautiful.

2:49 I mean, I can see where you'd be coming from, maybe,

2:52 you know, cuz white girls have stunning legs.

2:53 I've always said this.

2:54 White women have the most beautiful legs in the world.

2:56 Perfect legs, you know.

2:57 It's got the right shape and the got like the muscles and the thing.

3:01 You see it and then their calf just stands where it should and it's just,

3:04 you know, oh, it looks like a transformer just,

3:08 you know, oh, then they got their legs.

3:09 Have you seen when they walk in their heels?

3:12 Oh, they got that thing and he's like, what?

3:14 I was in a pizza place the other day at midnight after

3:16 a show and this woman came in and her legs shut the place down.

3:20 Everybody, people were chewing quietly.

3:25 She went to the counter.

3:26 We didn't even see her face.

3:27 We just saw her legs just stood there at the counter.

3:30 All of us are looking.

3:31 She was so Just the legs alone was stunning.

3:33 Stunning.

3:34 I didn't even see who she was.

3:35 I mean, she could have turned around and been

3:36 a man and still like I would have been like, "Oh, okay." Super hot.

3:42 White women have the most beautiful legs,

3:44 stunning legs, and they've got greatl looking hair.

3:46 Great looking, but looking hair.

3:47 That's why looking, not great hair,

3:48 cuz their hair falls out like too much for me.

3:50 It's just like like the hair sheds.

3:52 I don't know what it is about white women, but your hair is always shedding.

3:54 It's just falling.

3:55 I don't know what you did to your hair,

3:56 but it clearly hates you cuz it's always trying to leave your scalp, the hair.

4:00 No, white women shed like all the time.

4:02 You don't date a white woman.

4:02 You date a white woman in a lint roller cuz that stuff is everywhere.

4:06 It's on your clothes.

4:06 It's on the floor.

4:07 It's just like in the sink, in the basin, on the shower.

4:10 It's in your bed.

4:11 If you have a white woman, the worst thing in the morning,

4:13 it looks like you were wrestling a Labrador at night.

4:14 IT'S JUST LIKE LIKE FLUFFY FLUFFY.

4:17 THERE'S HAIR EVERYWHERE.

4:18 WHY?

4:19 Oh man, this is too much sometimes.

4:22 Too much.

4:22 And goes in their mouth and then you're

4:24 going to talk and the HAIR'S IN YOUR MOUTH.

4:25 HOW YOU GOING TO HAVE HAIR IN YOUR MOUTH?

4:26 WHY YOU JUST MOVE THE HAIR SAYING?

4:28 NO, THERE'S HAIR IN YOUR MOUTH.

4:29 DON'T SAY NOTHING.

4:31 Hair everywhere.

4:33 Whereas Indian woman, you don't have that problem with them.

4:35 No, no, Indian, their hair, perfect hair.

4:37 They're just as beautiful as white women.

4:38 But then they don't have the hair problem.

4:40 No, they don't.

4:40 That's where they got one up.

4:41 Yeah.

4:41 Yeah.

4:42 Cuz Indian women have strong hair.

4:44 Sexy hair.

4:44 It's black and it's silky and super strong.

4:46 You just grab it and you seen it.

4:50 Oh, it's just like just grab it like a chariot.

4:55 Take me to India.

4:58 Oh, Indian women have amazing hair.

5:01 It's the best hair in the world.

5:03 You know it's the best hair because even black women wear it.

5:05 That's when you know your hair IS GREAT.

5:10 when you get other people to wear it and it looks just as good on black women.

5:15 It's just as silky, just as straight, just not as strong though.

5:18 You can't be Don't touch.

5:21 Don't Yeah.

5:21 Yeah.

5:22 Yeah.

5:22 Don't Don't touch.

5:24 Just now you're there.

5:24 The chariot, the steering wheel will come off.

5:30 Roman's gone.

5:33 Indian women are stunning.

5:36 They're beautiful.

5:37 They've got beautiful features.

5:38 cuz they've got I mean look at the look at the Miss Universe competition.

5:40 There's always an Indian woman in the top 10.

5:42 Always always Miss India.

5:44 Huh?

5:44 You even look at Miss America right now.

5:46 Right now Miss America is an Indian woman.

5:48 H that's when you know you hot when you're winning other countries competitions.

5:56 Stunning.

5:56 Next level beautiful Indian woman.

5:58 everything about them until you get here and then yo

6:04 I don't know what happened because hey hey it's tough

6:08 here e cuz Indian girls get skinny like they yo

6:12 they leg they got like these yo super skinn they

6:15 got big knees and yo look like a like

6:17 a brown flamingo it's just like you know like oh man

6:23 how do you CUZ THEY'RE SO HOT BUT THEN THE LEGS

6:26 IS LIKE LOOKS LIKE A LONG distance runner or something.

6:29 Yeah, it's like Miss Universe and then Hal Salasi.

6:32 It's just a wow.

6:34 Oh man, why is this?

6:35 It's not my cup of biryani, man.

6:36 It's just, you know, it's balanced, but they're still beautiful.

6:42 All women can be beautiful.

6:45 Oh, there's no most beautiful.

6:46 I mean, you look at colored women.

6:47 Are you kidding me?

6:48 COLORED WOMEN.

6:49 WHAT?

6:50 Colored women are beautiful.

6:55 Beautiful and dangerous.

7:03 Colored women are like blood diamonds.

7:06 You want them, but you're not you might not get out alive, eh?

7:09 Cuz they've got something about I mean,

7:11 they've got the right mix, the right features.

7:12 They just got that thing.

7:13 Oh, and you know what I love about colored women?

7:15 It's the fact that they faithful.

7:17 They are so faithful to their men.

7:19 When they say till death do us part, they mean it.

7:23 But it's your death cuz you don't leave a colored woman.

7:28 You be like, "I'm leaving you.

7:30 You leaving this earth." So there's a balance.

7:40 It's still beautiful.

7:42 All women, all women can be beautiful.

7:45 Black woman.

7:46 I'm willing to bet South Africa has by far

7:49 the most beautiful black women in the world.

7:52 In the world.

7:55 Stunners, great bodies, great vibe.

7:57 They know how to dance.

7:58 They got culture about them.

7:59 They're beautiful.

8:00 Yeah.

8:00 They might not love their hair, but you know,

8:03 they make up for it in other places.

8:05 Other places.

8:06 Have you ever huh?

8:09 Never.

8:10 Never doubled in the quarter system.

8:12 Never.

8:15 Cuz you see, there's something that a black

8:17 woman will give you that no other woman can.

8:19 No other woman, and that's ass.

8:23 But I mean ass.

8:25 Not just, I mean ass.

8:28 Black women have ass.

8:29 Beautiful ass.

8:30 Life-changing ass.

8:32 No other race has that.

8:33 None.

8:33 None.

8:34 Indian women don't have ass.

8:35 No.

8:36 No.

8:36 Colored women will have a bit here and there.

8:37 You know, white women have got flat asses.

8:39 Just like there's nothing there.

8:41 It just goes flat.

8:42 Some of them it's even worse.

8:43 It goes in.

8:44 Have you seen that?

8:45 What the hell is that?

8:46 It's like antie ass.

8:47 It goes the other way.

8:48 Looks like the Apple logo.

8:50 What the hell happened there?

8:53 And then they insist on wearing those costumes

8:55 and they'll be at the beach walking around.

8:57 Hey boys.

8:57 Hi boys.

8:59 H.

8:59 And then the costume they turn around but then

9:01 it's just hanging cuz there's nothing to hold on to.

9:03 You see the costume is panicking like ah ah there's no sabotra.

9:11 The costume just hangs.

9:12 They come out the water and then the beach sand gets caught on the costume.

9:15 Have you seen that?

9:16 Yeah.

9:16 And then it looks like they shot themselves.

9:19 Hi boys.

9:20 Hom ass, man.

9:26 You know the legs.

9:28 But have something have you know white women just don't they don't have ass.

9:30 Well, not all white women.

9:31 I must qualify this.

9:32 I must not all white women because Africans girls.

9:35 Hello thoseels and marikis.

9:42 Yo, I've seen some ass on Africans girls

9:45 like proper like almost almost black ass basically.

9:48 It's so ironic.

9:49 I think God did it on purpose.

9:50 E just to punish their dad for A BIRTHDAY

9:53 LIKE THIS WILL bring you together stunners.

10:01 But there's nothing like black ass.

10:03 Real black ass.

10:03 And I know a lot of guys are scared.

10:05 I know a lot of guys a lot of guys are like, "Oh,

10:07 but you know, Trev, I want a black woman." But prove that ass sometimes.

10:09 Like it's just very like I mean like how do you handle it?

10:12 Eh, how do you handle it?

10:14 And that's the thing.

10:14 You don't handle it.

10:16 It handles you.

10:18 Yeah.

10:19 Just get in there.

10:20 Let it do its thing.

10:20 Like autopilot.

10:25 And some guys go, "Yo, but you know,

10:26 my problem is it's just too big for me." It's just No, no, no.

10:28 There's a difference between big and black.

10:30 You got to understand that black is about shape.

10:32 Yeah.

10:33 There's a big difference.

10:34 People don't get it.

10:35 You know, cuz like white girls,

10:36 a lot of them will have those sad asses just like whereas black girls,

10:40 they fill the underwear out, see it, stretch the fabric, make it smile.

10:46 It's all about the shape.

10:49 I don't like big.

10:50 I won't lie.

10:50 I like medium to small, you know.

10:52 That's me.

10:52 Medium to small and firm, but not too firm.

10:54 Sometimes it gets too firm.

10:55 It's scary, you know.

10:56 It'll hurt you.

10:57 You spank it, it'll spank you right back.

10:59 He's getting there.

10:59 Pop.

11:03 That's me.

11:04 That's me, though.

11:05 Oh, some guys like it big.

11:06 And I know why.

11:07 Because it's fun.

11:07 It's fun.

11:08 It's got a rhythm.

11:08 It's juicy.

11:09 You know, you can get lost in that.

11:11 Oh, yeah.

11:11 I've seen that.

11:12 Just give it a spank.

11:13 You see that little wave that goes the other side?

11:16 If you're fast enough, you can catch the wave on the other side.

11:26 She'll be there like 15 love.

11:33 All women can be beautiful.

11:35 Get that out of your mind.

11:36 Explore a little bit.

11:38 Most beautiful race thing.

11:42 All women.

11:42 That's the only reason I can't be

11:43 gay is because there's too many beautiful women.

11:45 And I know gay is not a choice.

11:46 It's an orientation.

11:47 But I've thought of choosing it before.

11:48 Yeah, I have.

11:49 Cuz you know why gay is efficient.

11:50 Gay gets straight to the point.

11:52 Women take up too much of your time.

11:53 Women are stressful.

11:55 Women don't think you are.

11:55 But you're super stressful.

11:57 Guys, you have a good time with guys.

11:58 I like guys.

11:59 Guys like me, we have a good time hanging out.

12:00 Yeah.

12:01 When guys are sitting watching sports,

12:02 you never see two guys look at each other and the one goes,

12:04 you know, sometimes I feel like I'm not even here.

12:11 Guys never do that.

12:15 I've thought of it.

12:15 I thought, "Hey, Trevor,

12:16 why not be gay?" The only pre I don't find men attractive.

12:18 That's the only reason.

12:19 Otherwise, I'd be in there party time all the time.

12:22 Yeah.

12:22 But I couldn't, you know, cuz gay is efficient.

12:25 Gay is efficient and successful.

12:27 A lot of people don't think of it,

12:28 but they are most successful people on the planet.

12:30 You never see Never see a gay beggar, huh?

12:32 Do you?

12:33 Oh, that's true.

12:34 Where have you ever seen gay homeless people?

12:36 Ever?

12:37 Have you ever been at the traffic lights and seen a gay guy walking down?

12:54 Never seen that.

12:57 Gay is successful because it's focused and efficient.

13:01 All the greatest leaders of our time.

13:02 All the greatest dictators, all those who conquered were gay.

13:06 Yeah.

13:06 All of them.

13:07 Think about them.

13:08 The Genghask Khn.

13:09 Yes.

13:10 All of those guys were gay.

13:12 Yeah.

13:12 Attilla the Han.

13:13 The stories of them being gay.

13:16 They basically had slaves that they had sex with, male slaves.

13:18 Alexander the Great conquered half of Europe and Asia.

13:21 He too was gay.

13:23 All of these stories, all of them.

13:24 Julius Caesar, the Roman Empire.

13:26 They were gay and it was normal then.

13:27 I mean, they didn't even wear pants.

13:28 You knew these things.

13:30 Yeah.

13:30 Anytime is tea time there.

13:36 And you know it's gay.

13:37 It's just history.

13:37 You know, it loses it over time.

13:39 Gets lost in translation.

13:40 But you know Julius Caesar was gay cuz you read the story.

13:44 What happened that one fateful night was surrounded by a group

13:47 of men when all of a sudden he was stabbed from behind.

13:57 That's gay.

13:58 And you know it's gay because if I was getting stabbed,

14:00 the last thing I'd do is turn around and say, "You too, Brutus." He's gay.

14:08 Gay and powerful.

14:09 Gay and successful.

14:10 All of them.

14:10 Yeah.

14:11 Shakazulu was gay.

14:13 Yeah.

14:14 Oh, Trevor.

14:15 Oh.

14:16 Ah.

14:17 Baba.

14:17 Too soon.

14:18 Too soon.

14:20 Too soon.

14:22 What's wrong with Shaka being gay?

14:24 He was a powerful, successful man.

14:25 There's nothing wrong with being gay.

14:26 And Shaka was probably gay.

14:28 You look at all the things that led to it.

14:29 All the things that showed, huh?

14:31 The dress code or the undress code of his soldiers.

14:34 All of his soldiers Shaka demanded had a six-pack, leopard skin, ass out.

14:43 Shaka did everything with his men.

14:46 In fact, Chucka would go on long trips with these soldiers.

14:49 No women allowed.

14:51 And on these retreats, he would preach to them.

14:53 He would tell his soldiers,

14:53 "Do not seek the love of a woman, for it'll make you weak.

14:57 If you want to be strong,

14:59 seek the love of your fellow man." Shaka never married.

15:08 Shaka never loved a woman other than his mother.

15:11 And Shaka Zulu, he was gay.

15:13 Yeah, there's nothing wrong with it.

15:14 People go, "Trevor, he was strong.

15:15 He's not gay." Yeah, gay doesn't mean weak.

15:18 No, it doesn't.

15:19 Shaka did everything in a gay way.

15:21 He was the first military dictator to develop the oxbow technique.

15:25 Remember that?

15:25 He defeated the British by distracting them from the front,

15:29 flanking their sides, and penetrating from behind.

15:39 Like he's not gay.

15:40 Oh, if he wasn't gay,

15:41 how can you not be gay when you march into battle and your theme song isom?

15:52 How many clues do you need people?

15:55 When they would march into battle, what was the Zulu war cry?

16:07 Which sounds scary.

16:08 Yeah.

16:08 Even colored people be like, "Okay, okay." Okay, okay, okay,

16:12 we can must talk about it, but we can talk about it.

16:14 Yeah, they talk about it.

16:16 Yeah.

16:16 Sounds scary until you translate it and then you realize what these men were

16:20 shouting at the beginning of every battle

16:22 as they looked into the enemy's eyes was,

16:24 "ARE YOU AFRAID OF THESE MEN?" NO, we are not afraid.

16:31 We want them.

16:38 You guys have been fantastic.

16:39 Johannesburg, thanks for coming out.

16:42 I had a great time.

16:44 Good night.