James Acaster Wants People to Heckle Him; Reveals Thoughts on John Oliver, SNL UK and Marvel Movies

0:01 -James, I'm so happy to have you here in person.

0:03 -Thank you, Seth, it's good to see you.

0:04 -You're doing a US tour.

0:06 -Yeah, yeah, I'm touring...

0:09 Laughter] I'm touring the US.

0:12 -Got a new show called...

0:13 -U.

0:13 S.

0:13 of A.

0:14 -...called, uh...

0:15 Laughter] Your new show is called "Hecklers

0:17 Welcome." -Guess what the A stands for.

0:19 -The U.

0:20 S.

0:20 of A.?

0:21 -Yes.

0:21 -What is the A in "U.

0:23 S.

0:23 of A." stand for?

0:24 -America.

0:26 Laughter] You should know, man.

0:28 You live here.

0:28 That's embarrassing.

0:30 That's some embarrassing stuff.

0:31 Laughter] I do my research before I tour.

0:34 -So, the show is called "Hecklers Welcome."

0:36 A lot of comedians don't like hecklers,

0:37 but it seems like you're just going to encourage them.

0:39 -Oh, I really don't like them.

0:41 -Okay.

0:42 Oh!

0:42 -Yeah, I hate hecklers.

0:43 -Okay.

0:44 -But I wanted to get over that.

0:45 And this is like, uh, like exposure therapy.

0:49 Do you know what that is?

0:50 -Yeah.

0:50 Like, if you're afraid of spiders, they put them all over you.

0:53 -Yeah.

0:53 Like, if Macaulay Culkin stuck his head in a beehive.

0:55 Laughter] -Was that what that was?

0:59 That was exposure therapy?

1:01 -That's what that whole film's about.

1:04 -I had no idea.

1:05 Changes it.

1:06 -Yeah, yeah, he's scared of loads of stuff, that kid.

1:08 Burglars.

1:10 He's scared of burglars, and uh...

1:11 -Oh, did he invite the burglars to come

1:13 as a way of getting over his fear of burglars?

1:16 -They cut that scene from the film.

1:18 -Oh.

1:18 -His therapist tells him...

1:20 "Why don't you just try exposing yourself to more

1:22 burglars?"[ Laughter] That was what the whole thing was about.

1:26 -Wow.

1:26 I feel bad for whoever played the therapist.

1:27 Obviously, that was a pretty juicy part, and then...

1:29 -Yeah, yeah, that was pretty bad.

1:31 But that was— you know who played the therapist?

1:32 -Who was that?

1:33 -David Pumpkins.

1:35 Laughter] -The "SNL" character?

1:36 -Yeah, yeah.

1:37 That was...

1:38 He got his break further down the line when

1:40 he got on "SNL." But it was originally David S.

1:44 Pumpkins.

1:45 -You, uh...

1:46 you have a musical collective called Temps.

1:50 -Guilty.

1:50 -And you have a new song out.

1:53 -Yeah.

1:53 -And this is from the video of the song.

1:55 And uh, this is an alligator suit of sorts.

1:58 -Yeah, that is.

1:59 -And this is your alligator suit.

2:01 -Yes, I had that made for myself, and I'm in that alligator suit.

2:04 -Gotcha.

2:04 -And uh, I got heat stroke.

2:06 -Really?

2:07 Laughter] Do you blame it on the suit or the day you filmed the video?

2:11 Or a combination?

2:13 -Uh, a combination.

2:14 Also my own stupidity.

2:16 -Okay.

2:16 -It wasn't a...

2:18 I wasn't a good idea.

2:19 I wouldn't advise it to anyone.

2:20 But I got myself an alligator mascot suit made,

2:23 and thought I might as well go on a load of roller coasters.

2:26 Actually, that was day two.

2:27 Day one, I got heat stroke.

2:28 -Well, you really— I mean,

2:29 these seem like awful things to be doing in an alligator suit on a hot day.

2:33 What was your vision?

2:34 Why did you want to make an alligator suit?

2:36 -Well, I had a toy like that as a kid, a massive Party Gator.

2:40 The t-shirt says "Party Gator." I won it at a fair.

2:43 -Uh-huh.

2:43 -Got it as a kid, same time I got my drum kit.

2:46 Then, as an adult, made this album, got the drum kit,

2:50 got the got the Party Gator back from my parents' house.

2:52 It was meant to be a big thing.

2:54 And then, when COVID hit, I gave both of them, the drum kit and the Party Gator,

2:57 to a school I used to work at for safe keeping.

3:01 Then, for a video, I was like,

3:02 "I'm going to put that toy in the video." Phone the school up,

3:04 they were like, "Yeah, we threw that in the trash."[ Laughter] Like,

3:09 that was my childhood toy.

3:10 They were like, "Yeah, thanks."[ Laughter] So,

3:15 then, I had to get that made myself.

3:17 Obviously, that's what I had to do.

3:19 I was like, "I guess I'll become the Party Gator now." -Well,

3:21 there was something, you also— You used to work at the amusement park, right?

3:24 -I used to work there, I used to serve food and drink at that amusement park.

3:27 That's how they let me in now.

3:28 They give me the run of the place.

3:30 -Oh, wow.

3:30 So, you just, if you work at an amusement park in England,

3:33 you just sort of forever, the rest of your life, you're...

3:35 -You phone them up and go, "I'm dressed as the Party Gator today.

3:37 Can I come in?" They're like,

3:38 "You don't even need to ask."[ Laughter] -They did an even nicer thing,

3:43 they named a goat at the amusement park after you.

3:46 -Yeah, that goat is called James Acaster.

3:48 -Wow.

3:50 Did you ever think when your career started it would hit that height?

3:53 -Well, I always hoped that, one day, I'd be the GOAT.

3:56 Laughter][ Cheers and applause] -You did it!

4:03 -I did it, man.

4:03 -You did it.

4:04 Pretty early.

4:04 And now, you say— Now, who knows what height you're gonna hit?

4:07 Already the goat.

4:08 -Yeah.

4:09 I can't wait to see what dizzy heights I get to.

4:10 Here we are at 30 Rock.

4:12 Means a lot, man.

4:14 Laughter] This is where I first heard of David S.

4:19 Pumpkins.

4:19 -Right.

4:20 "30 Rock." -"30 Rock." And now I'm here.

4:22 -And then, you first heard of him here, then you IMDb'd him,

4:25 saw that he was cut from "Home Alone." -I was like,

4:28 "I bet there's an interesting story behind that." -You also,

4:31 so, you're a music producer, stand-up, you have a true-crime podcast.

4:35 -Yeah, I've got a true-crime podcast coming out.

4:37 What a lot of people don't know about me is that, yeah,

4:40 you know me as a stand-up comedian...

4:41 -I do.

4:42 -...but I'm actually an undercover cop who's undercover as a stand-up comedian.

4:45 -Oh!

4:45 Laughter] From the beginning?

4:47 -From the very beginning, I had to infiltrate a gang of drug dealers

4:50 who were dealing drugs to comedians backstage at comedy gigs.

4:53 Laughter] So, I became a stand-up comedian to infiltrate the gang.

4:57 The case didn't go great,

4:58 but my comedy career has gone from strength to strength.

5:01 -Oh!

5:01 -That's just what happened.

5:03 And I've decided now that I've been kicked out the force,

5:06 I'll just do a true-crime podcast where

5:08 I share my wire recordings with the public.

5:10 -Oh, wow.

5:10 -Yeah.

5:10 So, that's what it is.

5:12 It's called "Springleaf." We've got a Kickstarter

5:14 for it now because I ain't paying for it.

5:16 Laughter] -Why should you?

5:18 -Why should I pay for it?

5:19 I'm an undercover cop.

5:20 You see the wages we're on?

5:21 Laughter] -Is it better or worse wages when you go undercover?

5:25 Do you get a per diem when you go undercover?

5:27 -Yeah, yeah, yeah, you get a per diem,

5:29 they go, "Right, big undercover today." So,

5:31 you have this— and what I— mistake I make is that I,

5:35 in front of the drug dealers, I pull out my per diems in the envelope

5:38 that says "undercover cop per diems."[ Laughter] They're like,

5:42 "What's that?" I'm like, "Oh, just a joke." -Oh, well, that's a good cover.

5:46 -Comedian.

5:46 They love it.

5:47 Laughter] -You also have a self-help book.

5:51 -Yeah.

5:52 -Based on something you went through?

5:54 -What people don't know about me, Seth...

5:56 -Uh-huh.

5:56 Laughter] Is most of it.

5:58 -...is...

5:59 Laughter] Yeah, I'm a Party Gator, I'm a musician,

6:05 I'm a comedian, I'm an undercover cop, I'm also a self-help guru.

6:09 -Okay.

6:10 Laughter] -I came off of social media, everyone wanted to know how I did it,

6:14 so I've released "James Acaster's Guide to Quitting Social Media:

6:16 Being the Best You You Can Be

6:18 and Curing Yourself of Loneliness, Volume 1." -Okay.

6:20 Laughter] -A lot of tips in there about how to quit social media.

6:23 The main important thing is you have to take what social media used to give you,

6:27 and you have to replicate that in your day-to-day life.

6:30 -Oh, interesting.

6:30 -So, now, you know, in normal life,

6:32 I have to stalk my girlfriends for real— my ex-girlfriends.

6:35 Laughter] I start arguments with strangers all the time.

6:39 -Just on the street?

6:40 -Really aggressive arguments.

6:42 Laughter] Saying stuff that I should not be saying, quite frankly.

6:45 -Yeah.

6:46 Laughter] -Yeah, I do all of that, and you know,

6:49 if you want to get updates on all your friends' kids,

6:51 you gotta do what I did and open your own crèche.

6:53 Scattered, quiet laughter] Do you even call it a crèche in this country?

6:56 Laughing] No.

6:57 -I got the big sense just then that you don't.

6:59 Laughter] Listen, when I did my research about America,

7:03 I learnt what the A stood for, and I stopped there.

7:06 Laughter] I didn't bother looking up if you had crèches or not.

7:11 -There was a real— you felt the wind when you said crèche.

7:14 -Oh, I felt it.

7:16 I felt it hard.

7:17 -What do you think...

7:19 I feel bad that I haven't even, based on what you said,

7:21 I still don't know what a crèche is.

7:23 How would you describe it?

7:24 I'll try to find the word for it.

7:26 -Oh, yeah, yeah, it's like where people go and drop

7:28 their kids off for the day to be looked after.

7:30 -Like a daycare.

7:32 -Yeah, if you want to say that.

7:34 Laughter] -Well, now you know,

7:39 you're going to do your show here in New York City, you're doing stand-up here.

7:42 -Yeah, I'm doing stand-up here in New York City.

7:43 I'm going to yell out, "Hey, give me a cheer if you came from the crèche!

7:46 Oh, no, [bleep].

7:48 Daycare!

7:49 Daycare!" -And then, think of me and how I bailed you out.

7:52 -Yeah, I'll be like, "That joke goes out to Seth Meyers." Actually,

7:56 I'm gonna dedicate every joke tonight to you, Seth.

7:58 I won't even tell the audience why, but I'll say it after every single gag.

8:02 Laughter] How come there's a door there and no one ever walks through it?

8:09 -It's a great question.

8:10 -It's very confusing that we have to come through the window every time.

8:14 -Yeah.

8:14 Do you want to use the door next time?

8:16 -Well, I think someone should use the door.

8:17 -Okay.

8:18 -I think— look, I don't fully know all the American customs,

8:24 but back in the UK, we enter through the door.

8:28 Laughter] -We believe it's good luck to have a door you never use.

8:37 Yeah.

8:37 -That's nice, actually.

8:38 I will remember that for next time I'm visiting an American friend.

8:42 -You sent me a lovely text.

8:44 When I came back, first show after the writers' strike,

8:46 I thanked everybody who helped the writers get the deal they deserved.

8:50 And then you— The next day, you texted me and said,

8:52 I also should have said you're the best guest we have on the show.

8:56 You said I missed an opportunity.

8:58 -It was weird that you left that out.

9:02 Laughter] I watched it and I thought,

9:04 "This is a lovely homage to all of the writers,

9:08 but clearly, someone didn't write this monologue for him,

9:12 because if they did, they would have said, 'By the way,

9:14 James Acaster was the best guest we've ever had

9:16 on the show.'" But you know, it was weird.

9:19 But I just enjoy texting you, Seth.

9:21 -Oh, well, thank you.

9:22 I've texted you in the past.

9:23 -You have.

9:24 We've texted each other.

9:24 And we couldn't text for five months because of the writers' strike.

9:27 -Exactly.

9:28 Laughter] We could have called, but neither of us wanted that.

9:31 -No, we didn't text.

9:32 We didn't e-mail.

9:33 I sent my mother a blank birthday card.

9:36 Laughter] God knows how it got to her.

9:40 Laughter] -Oh, right.

9:42 Even the address.

9:43 Sure, sure, sure.

9:45 I texted you once...

9:47 Laughter] I texted you once 'cause my kids have this story box,

9:51 and you put a little— like, a fella on top, and it tells you a story.

9:55 And they have "James and the Giant Peach." And I'm listening to it,

9:57 and all of a sudden, I go, "I know that voice," and it was your voice.

10:00 You read "James and the Giant Peach" to my kids,

10:03 and I texted you to say how great it was.

10:05 -Yeah.

10:05 It meant a lot that— Because I know that you couldn't read it to them...

10:09 Laughter] because of the readers' strike.

10:14 Laughter] Of course.

10:16 -Yeah, yeah, yeah.

10:16 -Everyone knows that.

10:18 -Yeah.

10:18 -There was a lot of people...

10:21 like you.

10:22 -Yeah.

10:22 -You refuse to read to your kids ever...

10:24 -Absolutely, yeah.

10:25 -...during that strike,

10:26 and you had to— You had constant negotiations with your kids.

10:29 -Yep.

10:29 I was like, "I'd love to, but this is a union household." -And eventually,

10:33 you came to an agreement,

10:35 and they were like— They drew up the contracts, and you were like,

10:38 "I'm not signing something I can't read."[ Laughter] It was a sad day.

10:48 -It was a tough time.

10:49 "Hecklers Welcome" is a— This is a tour you've been on for a while,

10:52 and you basically do a thing that I think no comedian actually ever does,

10:56 which is you invite the audience to heckle you.

10:58 Do you have a favorite heckle from recent shows?

11:01 -Well, right.

11:03 So, I did it in Scandinavia first.

11:06 I did a tour of Scandinavia, and in Gothenburg, which I'd never been to before,

11:09 I got heckled with— "You have freakishly long fingers"

11:12 is what the person— So— that's not freakishly long.

11:15 I don't think that's— I'll get the angle right.

11:18 Oh!

11:19 Laughs] Yeah.

11:20 -Now that I see it on camera...

11:23 Laughter] Good God!

11:27 -Yeah.

11:28 -Some heckles are quite useful, actually.

11:30 -Well, there's not much you can do about it, though.

11:32 -Not much you could do about that at the time.

11:34 I can't— I'm holding the mic,

11:35 so I've got to continue to have them on full display.

11:38 Laughter] And I said— but it was an English voice heckling me, and I was like,

11:45 "We're in Sweden." And he was like, "Yeah,

11:48 I flew over to see the show." This is a fan.

11:51 -Yeah.

11:52 -Someone who's supposed to like me.

11:53 -Yeah.

11:53 -And they heckle that.

11:55 And I remember, afterwards,

11:55 thinking it's a bit odd that he's flown quite a long way just to heckle me.

11:59 Then, I did a gig in Scotland, in Glasgow,

12:02 and midway through that, someone heckles me and goes,

12:04 "You were better in Gothenburg."[ Laughter] And I'm thinking in my head,

12:11 "That's the last place I got a mean heckle."[ Laughter] "I mean,

12:15 did you heckle me there,

12:16 as well?" He went, "Yeah, yeah, yeah."[ Laughter] I went,

12:19 "About the fingers?" "Yeah, yeah, yeah." "Well, you got me twice.

12:24 You're a bully." He was like, "Yeah, yeah, yeah." He said,

12:27 "I don't even live here."[ Laughter] Flown— I was like,

12:32 "Right, okay." Last week...

12:34 Laughter] I was in Vancouver.

12:37 -Uh-huh.

12:38 -"You were better in Glasgow." I went,

12:41 "That better not be who I think it is."[ Laughter] He's like,

12:44 "Yeah, yeah, I've flown here." Same guy.

12:47 Same guy.

12:49 I hate that I'm mentioning it on TV because he's going to love this.

12:52 Laughter] He's going to be delighted that it's worked.

12:55 He's going to turn up and see me somewhere else.

12:57 And I mean, I'm trying to come up with a comeback,

13:00 because it's going to be, "You were better in Vancouver." -Yeah.

13:02 You have time to plan it.

13:04 -I've got so much time.

13:06 But he's good.

13:07 -Yeah.

13:08 Laughter] And is this— -He's good.

13:11 I can't— I mean, he's better than I am.

13:14 -You recently got heckled in your own home.

13:17 -Yeah.

13:18 -Yeah.

13:19 -You know, this might be a bit— I'm worried

13:21 this will be a bit too mean for American audiences.

13:23 -Okay.

13:24 -You know, they often— They're more empathetic.

13:27 In England, we think this is funny.

13:29 -Okay.

13:30 Laughter] -I had a TV delivered,

13:32 and the guy delivering the TV put it down in my living room,

13:35 pointed at it, and went, "Ain't seen you on one of these in a while.

13:38 You been fired?"[ Laughter] "You been fired?"— from TV!

13:45 From all TV!

13:47 That's why I'm here.

13:48 -Oh, to prove to him?

13:50 -Yeah, prove to him, man, 'cause I am fired from all UK TV.

13:53 -Okay.

13:53 The Beacon— I'm very excited you're going to be at the Beacon,

13:57 one of my favorite venues in New York to see shows at, to do shows at.

14:00 I've been doing shows with John Oliver there once a month.

14:03 -Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

14:04 Laughter] I'm aware.

14:11 -Okay.

14:12 Laughter] -I thought it was a really big deal.

14:15 I was really excited about doing the Beacon.

14:16 -Yeah.

14:17 -I get there.

14:18 It's where you try out your new material.

14:21 It's just a jolly for you.

14:24 You and Oliver rock up and try out new gags.

14:26 Who cares?

14:27 It's a— I turned up and I was like, "Here we go.

14:30 I'm in the big city." I was like, "Is this the Beacon Theatre?" And they went,

14:33 "Are you here to see Seth Meyers do new material?"[ Laughter] "No,

14:36 I'm here to perform my polished show

14:39 that I've worked for ages on."[ Laughter] But yeah,

14:43 they speak very highly of you there, Seth.

14:45 -I'm very happy to hear it.

14:47 Now, you know, John Oliver— obviously, you know, he came over,

14:49 made a big deal of himself here in the U.S.

14:50 Is that a path you see for yourself one day?

14:53 -It would be if Oliver wasn't so goddamn territorial.

14:56 -Oh.

14:57 Laughter] Oh, so that's, like,

15:01 very off limits for— -You can't— You come over here,

15:04 you open your door to your dressing room, he's in the corner peeing.

15:07 -No!

15:08 No!

15:09 Laughter] -He pees all over everything.

15:12 If you're a UK comic in the U.S., you get on your flight, he's at your seat.

15:18 Laughter] Just soakin' it up.

15:23 Sprinkling it everywhere.

15:25 He goes, "Enjoy the flight.

15:26 Remember who the king is." -Oh, my God.

15:28 That doesn't sound like the John I know.

15:30 -And then he sits on the pilot's lap and makes airplane noises the whole way.

15:34 Laughter] -I can't— I work with this person!

15:39 I can't believe he's that cruel.

15:41 -Well, you're lucky that you're American.

15:42 If you're UK, my whole journey has just been urine,

15:46 wall-to-wall,[ Laughter] John Oliver's urine.

15:50 And he's drinking nothing but Dr Pepper.

15:54 Laughter] -You did make some real— You got a real foothold here in the U.S.

15:58 You're in the new "Ghostbusters" movie.

16:00 There you are.

16:00 That's you.

16:01 Cheers and applause] That's Dan Aykroyd.

16:03 -That's Dan Aykroyd.

16:04 -That's a really big deal.

16:06 -Yeah, it's— I'm waiting for them to realize they've made a mistake.

16:10 -Yeah.

16:10 It seems like it would be hard to edit you out.

16:12 You're right in the middle of the shot.

16:13 -Yeah.

16:13 I mean, my plan, really, obviously,

16:16 is to take that guy who delivered my TV to the cinema.

16:19 Laughter] They ain't fired me from that.

16:22 I got a promotion.

16:24 Bad luck.

16:24 -Was it exciting?

16:25 -It's very exciting.

16:26 Every day was nuts.

16:28 You meet Dan Aykroyd and Slimer.

16:31 Laughter] -Slimer a good guy in person?

16:34 -Lovely guy, Slimer.

16:35 -Yeah.

16:35 -I tell you what— when Slimer's left the room,

16:38 it's a lot cleaner than when John Oliver's been in there.

16:40 Laughter] -Please welcome back to the show our friend, James Acaster.

16:44 Cheers and applause]♪♪♪♪ James, welcome back!

16:58 -Hello, Seth.

16:59 -You mentioned last time you were very frustrated that our guests

17:02 come out the window when we have a door right there,

17:05 and then you just sort of took it upon yourself this time, I guess, to do door.

17:09 -It felt better today.

17:11 When I came through there, everyone in the room went, "Yeah,

17:14 that makes sense."[ Laughter] None of them thought that was weird.

17:18 -Yeah.

17:18 -They went, "Yeah, of course,

17:20 he's coming through that and not through the window." -Yeah.

17:22 I bet they retroactively now are like, "It was weird when the first guest didn't

17:27 use the door." -That's what it was, I think.

17:29 Whoever you had as your...

17:30 Do you remember who the first ever guest on this show was?

17:32 -The first ever guest on the show?

17:34 Yeah, it was my friend Amy Poehler.

17:35 -Egomaniac.

17:37 Laughter] "Ms.

17:39 Poehler, would you mind going through the door?" "Uh,

17:41 this star does not go through the door." -Oh, you think it's Amy's fault?

17:46 -Amy Poehler has got an ego the size of Texas!

17:51 -Oh, boy, you...

17:52 I don't know, I think you might not

17:54 know that she's an icon here in this country.

17:57 -Oh, yeah.

17:57 You know why?

17:58 'Cause she told you so.

18:00 Laughter] Amy Poehler needs to get over herself.

18:04 And I've been sent here to tell you all that.

18:06 -Oh, wow.

18:08 -My government thought it was very important.

18:10 -Oh, you're here on behalf of your government?

18:13 -Yeah!

18:14 -Alright.

18:15 -Absolutely, I'm here on behalf of the government.

18:17 They've sent me here to sort out a lot of stuff.

18:20 You guys have had a crazy month.

18:22 -Yeah.

18:22 That's true.

18:23 -I'm here to sort all of it out.

18:26 First of all, congratulations to Kendrick.

18:28 Secondly...

18:29 Laughter] That's the pleasantries out of the way.

18:33 -Yeah.

18:34 Move on.

18:35 -Secondly, you've got to realize you're a massive country.

18:38 What you do affects the whole world.

18:40 You're number one.

18:41 -Oh, well, thank you.

18:42 -We would like to propose to you that the entire

18:45 planet should be allowed to vote in your elections.

18:48 Laughter] -Okay.

18:49 Yeah, that's not...

18:49 Cheers and applause] That's not a terrible idea.

18:52 It's not a terrible idea.

18:55 -It's only fair, Seth.

18:57 It affects all of us, especially...

18:59 when one of the candidates is a climate change denier.

19:02 I think children should also be allowed to vote.

19:04 -Oh, yeah.

19:05 Kids.

19:05 -It's their future.

19:06 -That's true.

19:07 -Then, wildlife should be allowed to vote.

19:10 Trees.

19:12 The only people— and this is the only

19:14 exception who shouldn't be allowed to vote— Republicans.

19:17 Laughter] -Well, now, that doesn't seem fair anymore.

19:20 But, James, I have...

19:21 Cheers and applause] Oh.

19:25 Hey, since you mentioned trees, did you see the one outside?

19:28 Did you see?

19:28 I would imagine you're the kind of guy that's probably taken,

19:31 just loves the marvel of a giant Christmas tree.

19:34 -Man, Americans can't go two seconds without mentioning Marvel.

19:39 Laughter] There's too many series, Seth.

19:44 I can't keep up with it.

19:46 I'm not watching.

19:47 I'm not watching the films and trying to ask my friend every five seconds,

19:50 "Who's that one?" -Right.

19:52 I didn't mean to set you off on a Marvel screed.

19:55 -He loves the multiverse, this guy.

19:58 Backstage, he won't shut up about the multiverse.

20:01 It's all he's doing to everyone, is going, "Do you think RDJ's gonna be himself

20:06 from the normalverse or the multiverse?" Seth, no one cares!

20:10 Laughter] It's a desperate move on their part.

20:12 We think it's pitiful.

20:14 And my government sent me here to tell you that.

20:16 -Oh, boy.

20:17 Laughter] They're also here to tell us

20:19 about the Marvel— there's too many Marvel movies.

20:21 -Too many Marvel movies.

20:22 You got to let go of the multiverse.

20:24 But I do love the tree outside.

20:27 -It's not lit up yet, but the scaffolding is down, which is nice.

20:30 -That's not nice.

20:32 -What?

20:32 -My government want me to tell you...

20:35 that back in the UK, we keep the scaffolding up.

20:38 Laughter] All Christmas, we have the scaffolding up.

20:42 That is the most Christmassy thing in England,

20:44 is we have the scaffolding around the tree.

20:46 And then, when it's Christmas Eve, we get rid of the tree.

20:51 Laughter] And it's just the scaffolding.

20:54 -Oh, they sort of pull it out from under the bottom of the scaffolding?

20:56 -Yeah, well, no, you burn it.

20:59 You light a match and you just fling it in from a distance.

21:03 And then, we all sing in ancient English...

21:08 a song about how the tree is dead and long live the scaffolding.

21:12 And um, that's how we do it.

21:14 I'm not used to how you're doing Christmas in this country.

21:17 I don't like it.

21:18 -Which part is hard?

21:19 -All the lights have gone up.

21:21 All your Christmas lights.

21:22 -Yeah.

21:23 -Not how we do it back home.

21:25 -No.

21:25 -Darkness.

21:26 Laughter] The whole...

21:28 December 1st, all lights go off across the UK.

21:32 Total blackout.

21:34 And the UK— a lot of you all know

21:35 this, but it's very much like the little town in "True Detective:

21:39 Night Country." -Yeah, yeah, yeah.

21:41 -There's no sun.

21:43 Laughter] So, it's just pitch black for all of December.

21:46 -Wow.

21:48 -And then, the lights aren't allowed to come on again.

21:49 For Christmas day, you put the lights on, and then,

21:52 just whatever house you've ended up in, that's where you're spending Christmas.

21:54 -Oh, right, 'cause you have no idea where you are 'cause of the total darkness.

21:57 -You've all been stumbling around in the dark for a month.

21:59 Lights go on.

22:00 Well, I guess I'm spending Christmas with Gordon

22:02 Ramsay and Dick Van Dyke doing the voice.

22:04 Laughter] -Dick Van Dyke doing the voice!

22:07 -Chim-chiminey.

22:08 -Oh, my God.

22:09 You've been in New York...

22:10 This is a longer stretch than I feel like the last time you've been,

22:13 sort of in and out, but you've been in the States for a month.

22:16 You've been in New York City for a couple weeks.

22:17 -I have.

22:17 I've been here for a couple of weeks.

22:18 Yeah, you know, grown accustomed to it.

22:21 And sorry, I'm, I'm...

22:22 I'm drunk as hell.

22:24 -Oh, yeah.

22:25 Laughter] Do you feel...

22:27 Cheers and applause] Do you feel...

22:30 -I'm so drunk.

22:32 I got my wires crossed with this show.

22:34 When you emailed me, I thought I was doing the day drinking thing.

22:37 -Oh, no.

22:38 -I met up with a guy who, it turns out, only looks like you.

22:41 Laughter] And me and him have been getting trashed all day long.

22:45 I only knew I was meant to be here when you texted me going,

22:48 "Buddy, are you on your way?" And I was like,

22:50 "How have you texted me and been drinking a bowl of punch at the same

22:54 time?" -Were you never curious as to why there were no cameras around?

22:57 -Oh, I did, about five drinks in, I said, "We should be filming this," he went,

23:00 "You're right," and then he started filming me.

23:02 Laughter] He's got some very incriminating evidence

23:05 on that phone of me trying to burn that tree.

23:08 -Oh, my God.

23:09 You tried to burn the tree here?

23:10 -Yeah, I'll put it out...

23:11 -Five drinks in.

23:13 -...with my piss.

23:15 Laughter] -Do you like— do you feel like

23:17 New Yorkers— Do you like being around them?

23:20 -That...

23:21 Laughter] ...seems like a leading question, Seth.

23:25 -Well, I'm just curious, you know.

23:27 You seem to, like, call it like you see it.

23:29 -Look, look, I had a bad experience.

23:31 I was meant to go to— Well, I was going to Florida, to Disney World.

23:34 -Oh, you seem like a guy who'd love Disney World.

23:36 -Yeah, yeah.

23:38 -I know that you're gonna think this is...

23:39 You know, they do own Marvel.

23:41 -Yeah, yeah.

23:42 Well, that's why...

23:43 -So you kind of— in a way, you brought it up.

23:45 -Well, that's why I was sent there.

23:47 Laughter] To the heart of it.

23:49 -Oh, yeah, I see.

23:50 -I had to sit at a table with Mickey.

23:51 He's very— I'll tell you what.

23:53 When the cameras aren't around, he's a different guy.

23:56 -Mickey?

23:56 Scoffs] He doesn't take...he's not...

23:59 I tell you, he didn't get to where he is now by being nice,

24:01 let me tell you that.

24:03 That guy does not care.

24:05 -Okay.

24:05 -He's a confident guy.

24:06 -Mickey?

24:07 -Mickey.

24:07 He's confident.

24:08 Anyone— I have a theory that anyone with a two-syllable name,

24:11 they're the most confident people on the planet.

24:13 -Interesting.

24:13 -'Cause their name fits very easily into "Happy Birthday."[ Laughter] Like...

24:20 The rest of us, I've had a lifetime of people

24:22 going♪ Ja-ames♪[ Laughter] I don't feel like I belong here.

24:28 Every birthday, I'm like,

24:30 "Should I even have been born?"[ Laughter] Two-syllable name— Mickey.

24:35 Donald.

24:36 Um...

24:36 -Goofy.

24:37 -Yeah, yeah, Goofy.

24:38 The whole lot of 'em.

24:40 Donald also, coincidentally, the name of your president.

24:43 But like, they're all very confident people.

24:46 And it's 'cause they have two-syllable names, I swear to God.

24:48 Anyone with, like, a 3- or 4-syllable name, they don't make it to 50.

24:52 -Yeah.

24:53 Laughter] -Unlike "SNL."[ Laughter][ Applause] -Wait, why were you...

25:03 How was your trip to Disney?

25:05 -Happy 50th to "SNL." -Yeah.

25:07 I'm glad you're getting it out there.

25:08 Nobody's talking about it.

25:10 Laughter] -It's all we're talking about in England.

25:12 Laughter] We're going around going, "Oh, man.

25:15 Do you think you could ever make Lorne laugh?"[ Laughter] Aw,

25:21 so tough to make that guy laugh.

25:24 It's all we want to do in England is make Lorne Michaels laugh.

25:27 -Oh, that's great.

25:29 -So, that's the badge of a true comedian.

25:32 -Do you celebrate Thanksgiving, James?

25:35 -Yeah.

25:35 We celebrate.

25:36 Yeah, the 50th...

25:37 If we celebrate "SNL"'s 50th,

25:39 you better believe we celebrate a massacre we weren't involved in.

25:44 Laughter] Yeah, we're fully on your side with that.

25:49 We all celebrate it back home, and it's even weirder than you celebrating it.

25:54 Laughter] We're the OGs with that.

25:57 We, like, really aced colonialism.

25:59 So, like, yeah.

25:59 -How do you feel about...

26:00 Speaking of that, like, how do you feel about 4th of July?

26:02 I mean, that must be...

26:03 Is that a little weird for you?

26:04 -Uh, I think, uh...

26:06 Lazily named.

26:07 I'll say that much.

26:09 Laughter] You really put the effort in elsewhere.

26:14 At least Thanksgiving covers up what actually happened.

26:18 Laughter] "4th of July." Are you joking?

26:25 I don't even know.

26:26 I mean, we all celebrate that all year round.

26:28 That's very clever of you.

26:29 -Yeah.

26:29 -All of us have 4th of July.

26:31 May the July...

26:32 May the 4th July you.

26:34 Laughter] -I do want to say, before you go.

26:40 I loved your special, "Hecklers Welcome." -Oh, yeah.

26:42 We should talk about that.

26:43 -Yeah.

26:43 Cheers and applause] I feel like this has been a wonderful advertisement.

26:48 -Yeah, we've advertised it pretty well.

26:49 -But it's really, it's a great special.

26:51 You brought people, you invite them to heckle during the show.

26:53 -I let them heckle me for a whole tour.

26:55 -And do you feel like you get, when you invite people to heckle,

26:58 based on the fact that you tour the whole world in different countries,

27:01 you get a different kind of audience member?

27:03 -Yeah, everywhere.

27:03 And like, when I came here— and by the way, the offer is still open.

27:06 If anyone wants to heckle me, they can.

27:08 Everyone's allowed to.

27:09 It's absolutely fine.

27:10 I'm still completely open to hecklers.

27:12 It's made me calmer.

27:14 And I deal with people in a much more loving way now.

27:16 I'm very proud of myself.

27:17 -Yeah.

27:18 That lovingness, everything is coming through.

27:21 Laughter] -Thank you, Seth.

27:25 -It's on Max, and it's a fantastic special, and it is just the best to see you.

27:29 You gotta come back soon.

27:30 -I just have one question, though.

27:31 What is "Max"?

27:34 Laughter] 'Cause back home, that's a guy who feels pretty down on his birthday.

27:44 Laughter] You showed that clip last time.

27:47 -Same clip?

27:48 -It's the same clip.

27:49 -Well, we just— -No one ran it by me.

27:51 I didn't even know there was going to be a clip.

27:53 -Yeah.

27:54 -I got told just before I came through the door,

27:55 "We're just gonna show a clip." I was like,

27:57 "Oh, cool, this'll be cool to see what this is." -Yeah.

27:59 -That's the same clip, Seth.

28:01 -Yeah.

28:03 -People don't know me very well in this country.

28:04 I'm going to look like I've got one routine,

28:07 and it's getting heckled by someone and not saying much in response!

28:12 -Yeah.

28:13 It's really a better clip for the heckler than it is for you.

28:15 -Yeah!

28:16 That heckler is doing great!

28:17 You'll have them on the show next week.

28:19 Laughter] Show that clip again before they come on.

28:24 -One of the things I'm happiest about seeing you,

28:26 other than getting to watch that clip again, is...

28:29 you're our only guest that walks through

28:31 the door instead of, uh, the side, yeah.

28:33 Cheers and applause] -Thank you.

28:36 -Yeah.

28:37 Cheers and applause] -How am I still the only guest?

28:43 I did it in November.

28:45 -Yeah.

28:45 I assumed that once you've done that, everyone goes,

28:48 "It's stupid if I walk through the 'Friends' window." -Yeah.

28:53 Laughter] -But they're still doing it.

28:57 -Yeah.

28:59 The level of courage you have to just

29:01 basically say to the stage manager backstage, "no." -Yeah!

29:04 -He tried to— Your stage manager tried to push me through the window.

29:09 They're going, "Get in there!" I was like,

29:11 "Only way I'm looking through that window is if I'm spying on Ugly

29:14 Naked Guy."[ Laughter] -Nice tie-in for "Friends."

29:18 This is a lot of cross-promotion.

29:19 -I want to promote "Friends" as much as possible tonight.

29:22 Cheers and applause] I think, especially in this city, it's been forgotten.

29:27 Laughter] -I got to see you outside of the theater,

29:31 this theater, which was lovely.

29:33 We did a panel, a Emmy panel,

29:34 with other people who had stand-up specials on Max,

29:37 Brett Goldstein and Rose Matafeo, who are both lovely.

29:40 Cheers and applause] It was fun to be on a panel with you.

29:45 Although, if one of— you know, we are competing against each other,

29:48 I guess, technically, in the stand-up category.

29:49 -We are.

29:50 Yeah, we are.

29:51 You know, it's an honor, Seth, to be competing with you.

29:54 You're one of the greats.

29:55 And after...

29:56 Scattered cheers] -Ooh.

29:58 -Yeah.

30:00 Well, I definitely thought I'd get a little bit— a little bit more than that.

30:04 -That's got to sting, buddy.

30:06 Laughter] -It did, it did.

30:10 Cheers and applause] -That...

30:15 This is your show!

30:16 Laughter] -Yeah.

30:18 -They should have been on that.

30:20 -Yeah.

30:20 No, everything you noticed, I also noticed.

30:23 -Yeah.

30:23 That was one person trying to get the rest of them going.

30:28 No, no, you know, I think your special's fantastic.

30:30 And after, you know, we were talking about our specials afterwards because

30:34 the Emmys is a very new thing to me.

30:36 And I was like, "I don't know what to do here,

30:37 Seth." And you were like, "Listen, buddy,

30:39 I didn't even write any of my own material."[ Laughter] You said,

30:45 "I stole it from newer comics."[ Laughter] And you went,

30:50 "You want to know the crazy thing?

30:52 When I performed it at the taping, no one laughed at me."[ Laughter] "And I had

30:58 to go back to the clubs of New York,

31:01 secretly record on my phone the original comedians doing those jokes,

31:06 steal the laughter they got, and put it onto my special." -Yeah.

31:11 Laughter] -And you went,

31:12 "These idiots don't even know."[ Laughter] And that was—

31:16 that made me a lot less worried about it.

31:18 And I appreciate you taking me under your wing like that.

31:21 -I did tell you, that was all in confidence.

31:23 That's the only part that bothers me about this.

31:25 -Yes.

31:25 Yeah, well, you were very confident.

31:28 Laughter] -You are, I will say, there's a real confidence to your special,

31:34 "Hecklers Welcome," because you invite the audience to heckle you.

31:37 And last time you were here, you were about to do it at The Beacon.

31:40 And at the end of your interview,

31:41 you told my audience that they could heckle you, but it was over.

31:45 Does the invitation still stand this visit?

31:47 -Absolutely.

31:47 I'm a new man now since my tour.

31:49 So, anytime anyone wants to heckle me, it's always fine.

31:51 -Okay.

31:52 -Um, and— Oh, by the way, did they tell you don't ask me about Trump today?

31:56 -Okay.

31:58 -No questions about Trump.

32:00 -Great.

32:00 Wasn't the plan or anything.

32:03 Laughter] -I'm apply— my visa runs out.

32:06 Laughter] -Okay, gotcha.

32:10 So, yeah, why risk it?

32:12 -Gotta apply for a new one.

32:13 I'm told it's getting a bit dictatory here.

32:16 -That is the word we're using.

32:18 -So I'm not— I don't want to— don't ask me— -Just leave that alone.

32:21 -Yeah.

32:21 Because, full disclosure, I think he's a [bleep] piece of [bleep].

32:24 Laughter] -Yeah.

32:26 You don't wanna go there.

32:27 -Don't.

32:28 Cheers and applause] -I will keep that secret the way you kept mine.

32:38 -I can't risk anything.

32:41 -You talk about the relationship with hecklers has changed over the years.

32:44 Back in the old days, you would, when you got heckled at a show,

32:47 you would lay into the heckler because you had been in service

32:50 jobs where you felt like people had given you a hard time.

32:52 -Yeah, it felt cathartic because I used to work— I was a waiter.

32:56 Not a lot of people know this about me, actually.

32:58 I was a waiter at— You know Jack Rabbit Slim's?

33:01 -No.

33:01 It sounds familiar, but no.

33:04 It sounds like a name that I've been to, but I definitely haven't.

33:07 Is this a satisfying answer that I'm giving you right now?

33:10 -Sorry.

33:10 Are guest like this with you on the show?

33:13 Laughter] When you ask them questions,

33:17 do they come back with, "Is this a satisfying answer

33:20 for you?"[ Laughter] You're not used to it this way round?

33:25 -I didn't like it.

33:26 I didn't like that you were all of a sudden,

33:27 "Have you heard of?" I'm like, "Oh..." Whoa, whoa, whoa.

33:30 -I should have been— they did tell me before I came on, they went,

33:33 "Do not ask him any question.

33:36 He only likes to be the giver, never the receiver." -Yeah, yeah, yeah.

33:40 Laughter] -Oh, you're better than that!

33:44 Laughter][ Applause] Jack Rabbit Slim's,

33:50 you might know it as, it was the— -Yeah.

33:53 Uh, "Pulp Fiction." -Yeah,

33:55 in "Pulp Fiction." Where they go and it's, like, '50s themed.

33:58 -Yes.

33:58 -Like, Buddy Holly's the waiter and stuff.

34:01 That's where I worked.

34:02 -Did you have to be a Buddy Holly waiter?

34:04 -No.

34:04 Well, this was the problem.

34:06 This is why a lot of people gave me [bleep].

34:09 I just took it upon myself to be Kurt Cobain.

34:12 Laughter] 'Cause I liked his music a lot.

34:18 -Sure.

34:18 -And I'd be— I'd go to their table, I'd go, "Welcome to Jack Rabbit Slim's.

34:21 Can I take your order?" And they'd be like, "Yeah,

34:23 we'll have— Are you Kurt Cobain?"[ Laughter] "And this is—

34:28 we come here to be immersed in the 1950s.

34:30 He's a '90s grunge era musician.

34:33 This is completely taken me out of it." -Yeah.

34:36 -"I hate this.

34:37 I hate that you've done this.

34:38 Why are you Kurt Cobain?" And I'd have to keep it in.

34:39 I wasn't able to say anything to 'em.

34:41 And then they'd go, "Go and get us some $5 shakes and get

34:43 out of my sight." And I had to go to my boss, Tony.

34:47 And Tony was always on my back for being Kurt Cobain.

34:51 Laughter] I'd go, "Some $5 shakes for the Cadillac table." And Tony'd go,

35:01 "Are you— Are you jacking me?

35:03 Are you Kurt Cobain again?"[ Laughter] "This is Jack Rabbit Slim's.

35:07 It's 1950s.

35:08 They come here to be immersed in 1950s.

35:09 He is a '90s grunge era musician.

35:12 If I see you as Kurt Cobain again, there's going to be trouble.

35:15 And don't you dare tell me that you like

35:16 his music because I'm sick of that excuse."[ Laughter] And eventually,

35:21 I mean, this went on for...

35:23 a very long time.

35:24 Laughter] They sent this guy, one of the suits from head office came,

35:29 and I had to go in the office, and I went in.

35:33 I should have got changed before I went in.

35:36 Laughter] -Yeah.

35:40 -He sat down, and as I sat down in front of him,

35:42 he went, "I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it.

35:44 You're Kurt Co— It's a Jack Rabbit Slim's.

35:48 You're dressed as Kurt Cobain." -Yeah.

35:51 -"You know he's '90s era grunge?" -Yeah.

35:53 -"Everyone's complaining.

35:55 All the customers keep complaining about you

35:57 because you're coming here as Kurt Cobain.

35:58 That's not good enough." "If you're Kurt Cobain tomorrow,

36:03 you're not welcome at Jack Rabbit Slim's again.

36:05 You're not welcome." And I didn't go as Kurt Cobain the next day,

36:09 but they still fired me.

36:11 -Oh, really?

36:12 Laughter] -Why?

36:13 -I went as Dave Grohl.

36:15 Laughter][ Cheers and applause] -Hey, there's something...

36:21 You were so— you were so excited the last time

36:25 you were here because the "SNL" 50th was about to happen,

36:27 and you wanted to let everybody know, and you were so excited.

36:29 And now there's an "SNL: UK" is starting.

36:32 -Yes!

36:33 Cheers and applause] -And I mean...

36:36 -Whoo!

36:37 -Are you gonna maybe try to audition?

36:39 What do you think, James?

36:40 -Yeah.

36:40 Well, absolutely.

36:41 I'm so excited about it.

36:42 I mean, everyone in this country is excited about it,

36:44 I assume, from that response.

36:46 -I think we maybe— I don't think many people know.

36:50 -Someone told me John Oliver.

36:52 -Yeah.

36:52 John Oliver was here, and he's— John said he thought it was a terrible idea.

36:57 -Listen, you know why he said that?

36:59 He doesn't want you to find out about this.

37:01 Years ago, I think it was in the '90s

37:03 in the UK when John Oliver was still in the UK,

37:05 he tried to do his own "Saturday Night Live" kind of thing,

37:09 and it was a failure, and that's the only reason he's saying this.

37:11 -Really?

37:12 -Yeah.

37:13 It was called "Last Saturday Night This Evening Live."[ Laughter] -Yeah,

37:17 it's kind of a bad name.

37:19 It's a bad name.

37:22 Laughter] Looking back, the cast was crazy.

37:28 -Oh, it was a good cast?

37:29 -Just John.

37:30 -Well, it was pretty good.

37:32 -Just John playing all the characters in all the sketches.

37:35 And he did, like, there was the less cowbell sketch.

37:38 -Oh, less cowbell.

37:38 That's very— that's a very British take.

37:41 -Yeah.

37:42 -It was Joy Division in the studio,

37:45 but John Oliver was like all of the musicians.

37:47 He was having to run around.

37:50 He was very sweaty all the time because he was having to run around,

37:52 and he was still eating fish and chips because the, um,

37:55 the show would clash with his dinner.

37:57 So, he'd always be eating fish and chips

38:00 while running around playing all the musicians.

38:02 And then, he played, the producer would come out and be like,

38:05 "We need less cowbell." And then,

38:08 the band all just agreed, and they dropped the cowbell from the song.

38:12 And that was the sketch.

38:13 -Oh, that's bad.

38:14 Yeah, that's not good.

38:14 -I think there was two episodes ever.

38:17 One went out live on the Saturday night and one went

38:19 out on the Wednesday because he got too nervous on the Saturday.

38:23 -So, they pushed it?

38:25 -Yeah.

38:25 -Seconds before going live, he just turned, apparently, this is the story,

38:29 He turned to the producer and went, "Can't do it.

38:31 Too scared." He went, "Can't do it.

38:32 Too scared." So, they had to show...

38:35 I think they had an old episode

38:37 of "Cohorts." It's the English "Friends."[ Laughter][ Cheers

38:45 and applause] -You've been— I know you're—

38:52 -The unattractive nude gentleman is my favorite character...

38:55 -Oh, yes.

38:56 Of course.

38:56 -...on "Cohorts."[ Laughter] -You, uh, when you're in the city,

39:01 when you're in the States, do you miss the UK?

39:04 -Yeah.

39:04 Oh, man, I'm pining for it.

39:06 I miss my local dry cleaner, I miss the most.

39:10 -Why is that?

39:11 -It's called Dr.

39:12 Dry Cleaner.

39:13 Doctor spelled D-R.

39:14 So the sign looks like it says "Dr-Dry Cleaner."[ Laughter] And it

39:23 just gives me a lift every time I walk past it.

39:25 I like seeing it and just thinking in my head, DrDry cleaner, you know?

39:30 Well, I miss that, but it's been nice being here.

39:33 -How was the trip?

39:34 How was the trip to the States this time?

39:36 -Pretty sweet.

39:36 I liked, uh...

39:37 No Kings Day.

39:38 -Yeah, that was a good day.

39:40 Cheers and applause] Turned out.

39:42 People turned out.

39:43 -People turned out, pretty sweet.

39:46 I mean, the only thing I would say.

39:47 I think you should change the name if you're going to do it again, like,

39:50 you know, just be a bit more specific,

39:52 you know, "No Dictators Day" or something like that.

39:54 Because, like, I come from a country where we have a king.

39:58 He ain't doing nothing.

40:00 He's not— he can't— He can't have any influence over it.

40:03 That's not what a king is.

40:05 -Yeah.

40:05 -We talk trash about him all the time.

40:07 He can't do anything.

40:08 We're like, "Your mom's dead.

40:10 Audience "oohs"][ Laughter] -That's not talking trash!

40:17 -What?

40:18 -I feel like there's so much you could, like,

40:19 talk trash to him about without, like, that detail.

40:22 -Sure.

40:22 Your brother's a pedophile.

40:25 -Oh, yeah.

40:25 I guess he'd prefer your mom's dead.

40:27 -Sorry, sorry!

40:30 "Pedo-phile."[ Laughter] I know the pronunciation's different here.

40:37 -They were thrown.

40:38 They were all going, "oh!" because they hated the pronunciation.

40:41 -Pedophile.

40:42 Allegedly.

40:43 -Yeah, there we go.

40:45 -Sorry, illegally.

40:46 Laughter] Pronunciation is throwing me, guys.

40:50 Getting used to your American pronunciation.

40:52 -It's just always the best to have you here.

40:54 Thank you so much.

40:54 Will you come back again soon?

40:55 -Yeah.

40:56 I would love to come back again soon, Seth.

40:57 And I hope that when I do, your audience are bigger fans of you.

41:00 Laughter] -Thank you for repping with the merch.

41:04 -Coincidence.

41:04 Pure coincidence.

41:06 Laughter] I also forgot I was doing this today.

41:12 Laughter] I was just walking through the streets of New York, New York City,

41:19 and someone just ran out and went, "You're due on in five."[ Laughter] -Yeah.

41:25 -I was like, "Due on— What are you talking

41:28 about?" "You're doing 'Seth Meyers' today." And I was like,

41:31 "Well, this is going to be awkward.

41:33 I'm dressed in my Seth Meyers garb."[ Laughter] "He's gonna think

41:37 this is like some sort of kiss-ass thing." And they were like,

41:41 "Honestly, his ego is so big, he'll love it."[ Laughter] So, they just got me.

41:46 -So, you'll walk about on a city street with a mug from home?

41:50 -Yeah.

41:51 You never know when you're gonna need a mug, Seth.

41:54 In this life, you're walking around,

41:57 and what if someone starts to propose a toast?

42:00 Laughter] And I'm like, "I can't get in on this." -Yeah.

42:06 -And show my support for what they're toasting.

42:08 -Street toasts.

42:09 New York is known for their street toasts.

42:11 -Got to get it up there.

42:13 -Yeah.

42:13 -You know what I like to do as a prank?

42:15 Sometimes, in a bar, a friend will be going to the bathroom.

42:18 They say, "Can you hold my drink?" And while they're gone,

42:21 I'll propose a toast with their drink.

42:23 And then, when they get back, they don't know what they just drank to.

42:26 -Oh, right, 'cause they say,

42:28 "Let's drink to..." and then they have a drink and they never know.

42:30 -No, they're in the bathroom and I say, "Let's drink to fascists!" And then,

42:34 I put the drink there, and then they come back,

42:36 and they're like, "Ahh." I'm like...

42:39 -That's a good friend.

42:41 -I'll say to him, "Hey, remember earlier on?

42:44 This guy's a massive fascist right here." -I love having you in New York,

42:47 but I also— I was in your home state.

42:49 I was in London.

42:50 -Wax Trax!

42:51 Denver, Colorado, 8th of February.

42:53 -What?

42:53 -Half one, 1:30, 1:30, Wax Trax Record store— I'm doing a Q&A.

43:00 Laughter] -Wait, sorry?

43:03 -I'm doing a Q&A at Wax Trax in Denver, Colorado.

43:07 And because I don't have social media,

43:09 they're very worried that people aren't going to show.

43:11 -Okay.

43:12 -1:30, 8th of February.

43:14 It's a Q&A.

43:15 I promise.

43:16 Today, I'm only going to answer— like, half-answer all of Seth's questions.

43:20 If you want to know the full answers, you've got to come to Wax Trax.

43:24 Laughter] Put your hand up and ask the same question that Seth did,

43:27 and I promise I'll give you the complete answer.

43:30 1:30, Colorado, Denver, Wax Trax Records.

43:34 Record store.

43:34 It's a record store.

43:36 -1:30 in the afternoon on February 8th.

43:38 -That is all I do when I come to America.

43:40 I do "Late Night" with you and I do

43:42 Wax Trax at 1:30 in the afternoon in Denver, Colorado.

43:46 -But see, it feels like, you know, it's a vicious circle,

43:48 really, because if you had a social media,

43:50 you wouldn't have to use your time on my show

43:52 to promote the only other thing you're doing.

43:55 -It's annoying, and that's why I forgot about I was even

43:58 on here because I'm walking around just thinking about Wax Trax.

44:03 And then someone comes up, goes, "Remember,

44:04 you got to go on 'Seth Meyers' to promote Wax Trax." -Yeah.

44:07 -I'm like, "Oh, man, I forgot about..." -Well,

44:09 just plan ahead so you're not wearing your Wax Trax stuff at half one.

44:12 -Well, I do have a Wax Trax onesie,

44:17 and if I get caught with that, that'll be very, very embarrassing at Wax Trax.

44:21 1:30 on the 8th of February.

44:23 Laughter] -I thought, you know,

44:25 we were at a place where maybe we'd get to hang out in London.

44:28 I was in London, I have your phone number.

44:30 And I reached out and I said, "Hey, you want to get a drink?" -You didn't.

44:34 Laughter] What's this, in front of everyone?

44:37 You kept on texting me, going,

44:39 "Limeys go home, too many limeys." You kept saying,

44:43 "There's too many limeys here." You went,

44:45 "Limeys are absolutely getting on my nerves.

44:47 Limeys go home." And I had to text back and say, "Seth, this is where we live.

44:51 This is our country." And you text back, "I'm American."[ Laughter] Seth,

44:57 I tried to meet up with you and you were— you were like,

45:00 "Yeah, you want to meet up with me?

45:01 I'm where all Americans are in London—

45:03 in the queue for Dishoom."[ Laughter] And then,

45:10 I had to go to Dishoom to find you.

45:12 And you were texting me going, "Ah, I'm in the queue for Dishoom.

45:15 I really— I really want some black daal.

45:17 I'm jonesing for the black daal." And then,

45:19 you would send me a selfie from the queue.

45:21 And it was just Americans, it was, like, you, Zack Morris, Chuck E.

45:27 Cheese, and the Zodiac Killer.

45:29 Laughter] All queuing for Dishoom.

45:33 Kaley Cuoco was there.

45:35 -Yeah.

45:35 Laughter] She didn't know why.

45:37 -Young Sheldon and Old Sheldon.

45:39 -Both Sheldons.

45:40 -Very rarely do you see Young Sheldon and Old Sheldon together.

45:43 -Yeah.

45:44 -And by Old Sheldon, I don't mean Jim Parsons.

45:46 I mean the Old Sheldon from the forthcoming

45:48 series "Old Sheldon."[ Laughter] Which is a really,

45:51 really old version of Sheldon.

45:53 And he's in a nursing home,

45:54 he's got Alzheimer's, and he can't remember his life.

45:58 -Yeah.

45:58 -And they have to show him episodes of "Young

46:00 Sheldon" so that he knows what he even did.

46:05 And the laugh track throws him.

46:06 He's like, "Why are people laughing at me?

46:08 Do I live in a country where intelligence is seen

46:11 as humorous and something to be mocked?" And they're like, "Yeah, yeah,

46:14 you live in a country where it's funny if people are

46:17 clever or a nerd and we only respect ignorant bullies." Yeah,

46:22 well, hey, if you want to hear the end of that, come to Wax Trax,

46:26 Denver, Colorado, 1:30!

46:29 Applause] -Do you want to— -February the 8th.

46:33 -If Wax Trax wants to play the first half of your answer at the Q&A,

46:37 and then you can just tag on the end.

46:39 -Happily, I will happily do that, Wax Trax, if you're watching.

46:42 I hope they are watching.

46:43 I should have promoted this at Wax Trax so

46:46 that the Wax Trax people would watch this because actually,

46:49 this is severely under-promoted, my appearance on this.

46:54 -I think people knew you were coming here.

46:55 By the way, I did a talk show in London.

46:58 I was on Graham Norton's show.

46:59 -You were.

47:00 -Yeah.

47:00 Cheers and applause] It was a big deal for me.

47:04 -You did all the big— You did all the big talk shows in the UK.

47:08 You did, like, "The Yorkshire Pudding." You did "Pudding--" "Late

47:12 Night Pudding Boys." "Late Night With the Pudding Boys." Yeah.

47:16 "Pudding Chat." You did all them.

47:18 -Yeah.

47:19 I realize I didn't have enough to say about

47:21 pudding based on how many of them I did.

47:24 -You had a few things to say, buddy.

47:26 You should go online and see what he said on those shows.

47:30 Very controversial.

47:32 -I don't think it was that controversial.

47:33 -Uh, he had a leather jacket on and he put the collars up on the leather jacket,

47:38 and you kept on saying,

47:39 "This one's for the Swifties" and then passing wind and...

47:43 Laughter] And...

47:46 you said the Earth was— You said the Earth was fat.

47:49 -Flat.

47:50 -No, you said fat.

47:51 You're a Fat Earther.

47:54 You actually believe it's more spherical than it is.

47:58 You're like, "It's so big, there's actually more countries than we know about.

48:02 And they're all named stuff that sounds kind of like countries we know.

48:06 And there's only one world leader who dares pronounce them right in public...

48:10 Donald Trump."[ Laughter] Ohhhh!

48:14 -Are you worried?

48:16 Are you worried about being a foreigner

48:18 in this country in the current political climate?

48:20 -No way, man.

48:23 All I've been doing since I've been here— I'm

48:25 trying to rig your elections in the other way.

48:28 -Oh, you are doing what he's most worried about.

48:30 You're rigging elections.

48:31 -Yeah.

48:31 Big time.

48:32 I'm here, I'm rigging elections everywhere.

48:35 I'm putting up fake, like, voting booths that say,

48:38 like, "Trump votes only" on them.

48:41 And when people go in, the doors shut, it's an escape room.

48:44 -Oh.

48:45 Laughter] -And in order to get out,

48:48 they've got to solve this massive word puzzle where they got to put, like,

48:51 thousands of words in the right order and then read it out loud,

48:54 and then they realize that it's the, like, unredacted Epstein files.

48:58 -Oh!

48:59 Laughter] That's good.

49:01 -It's a really good trick.

49:03 Cheers and applause] -You have a podcast called "Off Menu." It's about food.

49:10 -Yeah.

49:11 -And you had the Robert De Niro on your podcast.

49:14 -We had Bob De Niro on.

49:17 My friend now.

49:18 -Are you friendly?

49:19 Did you get a meal with him afterwards?

49:21 -All we do is eat meals.

49:22 -Yeah.

49:23 -We constantly go, we always enter through the kitchen in a oner.

49:26 We, uh...

49:28 -Oh, so, even when you go to a regular restaurant, it's a oner back door?

49:31 -We went to Jack in the Box.

49:32 You know Jack in the Box?

49:33 -Yeah, yeah.

49:34 Laughter] -Just a oner, very short.

49:36 Well, it's quite an abrupt oner.

49:39 It's a small kitchen.

49:40 And then you sit down, and...

49:42 you chat to Bob.

49:45 You know that he only speaks in De Niro quotes?

49:48 Laughter] -That's not true.

49:50 -It's true.

49:51 And here's the thing a lot of people don't know.

49:52 He doesn't watch any of his films, so he gets the quotes wrong a lot.

49:55 Laughter] -Oh, that's awful.

49:57 -He says, "I'm the taxi driver, baby!"[ Laughter] -Yeah.

50:00 That's not— I've seen that movie a bunch of times,

50:02 that's definitely not— -"Bob, that's not one of your films." But it's like...

50:05 You know what he said to me the other day?

50:06 He said, "You know what my favorite film of mine is,

50:08 is 'Meet The [bleep]'."[ Laughter] I was like, "Bob,

50:12 with all due respect, it's called 'Meet the Fockers.'" -Yeah.

50:17 -He looked at me and said, "I think I would know if I was

50:21 in a film called— That doesn't even make any sense.

50:24 It's [bleep], it's funny.

50:27 Fockers is not a word."[ Laughter] I was like, "Bob, that's why it's funny.

50:33 It's like it nearly is [bleep], but it's not.

50:36 That's why everyone found that so funny when

50:38 he was called Focker." He said, "Funny how?

50:42 Funny--" I said, "That's not you.

50:44 That's Pesci." -Yeah, yeah, yeah.

50:46 Laughter and applause] -And he said, "I'm outta here." And then,

50:51 he went to leave, and he opened the door, and it blowtorched his head.

50:54 Laughter] -So, he got Pesci'd again?

50:58 -He got double Pesci'd.

51:00 And then, when his hair was on fire, he went, "Schmoking!" -Oh, yeah.

51:04 -"Somebody stop me!" And I was like...

51:08 "Bob, you weren't in 'The Ma--'" He's like,

51:09 "I was in— I won an Oscar for 'The Mask.'" He's adamant about this.

51:14 Does it all the time.

51:15 He says, "I won an Oscar for 'The Mask' and a Critic's Choice."[ Laughter] Said,

51:20 "I would have won the Golden Globe,

51:21 but Denzel won it for playing Steve the Pirate in 'Dodgeball.'"[ Laughter] -Man,

51:27 don't meet your heroes, right?

51:29 -Well, don't meet your heroes.

51:30 Sure.

51:31 But like, Bob De Niro is still my hero.

51:33 And so is The Mask.

51:35 Laughter] -Hey, I did a live "Taskmaster" in New York City.

51:41 You did a whole series.

51:43 -I did.

51:45 -And they, actually, as it turned out, this was amazing.

51:47 Me and John Oliver, it was three people who were just fans in the crowd.

51:50 -Yeah.

51:50 -They asked you to do it here in the States.

51:53 -I couldn't do it.

51:54 I didn't want to do it.

51:55 I didn't want to— but, like, you did great, by the way.

51:58 -You didn't see it.

51:59 -No, I heard all about it.

52:00 I did go and see it.

52:01 I was in the audience.

52:03 I watched it, and like—[ Laughter] I did.

52:05 I saw it.

52:06 It was really hard-core.

52:07 The tasks that they do in a live one are way hard-core.

52:10 Make a dog [bleep]?

52:13 Laughter][ Laughter continues] Fastest wins?

52:23 It was...

52:24 It was amazing, Seth!

52:27 Laughter continues] And your approach to that was really novel.

52:32 And I like it.

52:34 I like it on that show where people, like, pardon the pun, when they, like,

52:37 think outside the box and they have different approaches to the tasks,

52:41 and like— Who was there?

52:42 Who saw it?

52:43 Some people?

52:44 Scattered cheers] Who didn't see it?

52:46 Audience cheers] That's quite a lot.

52:48 Can I tell them how you did it?

52:49 Because it was amazing.

52:51 He jacked off the dog.

52:53 Laughter] It was so good, Seth.

53:00 -Thank you.

53:01 Thank you.

53:02 -And you deserved to win.

53:03 And the only reason you didn't win was

53:05 because the person— someone from the audience won,

53:08 who was, in their defense— in your defense, a dog.

53:11 They were a dog.

53:12 Laughter] And dogs know just how they like it.

53:15 So, that's not on you.

53:17 You did well on that one.

53:19 -Thank you, buddy.

53:19 And it's just so nice to have you here.

53:23 Laughter] -Who would think that that would

53:25 be the answer that saved the interview?

53:27 Laughter] The rest of it, I felt like I was on a tightrope.

53:31 And then, as soon as I said you made a dog [bleep]...

53:35 we were on Easy Street.

53:37 Laughter] That shouldn't have been what turned it around.

53:39 -But here we are.

53:41 We're living in crazy times.

53:43 -We're living in these crazy times, Seth.

53:45 And if there's one thing I know,

53:48 it's that the place to be is Wax Trax, Denver, Colorado, February the 8th.

53:53 Cheers and applause] -James Acaster, everybody.

53:55 Tickets to his North American tour are available now.

53:58 We'll be right back.