The New Guy Sucks - The Office US

0:00 What about this one?

0:01 It's kind of badass, right?

0:05 Just seems kind of crazy in a way I might need right now.

0:07 I don't know.

0:08 Oh, that's not yours.

0:13 Stanley just drank OJ out of my mug and didn't

0:15 seem to realize that it wasn't his hot coffee.

0:19 So, the question has to be asked, is there no limit to what he won't notice?

0:25 What's a sevenletter word for purse?

0:28 Satchel.

0:30 No.

0:30 Starts with an H.

0:34 Handbag.

0:34 Thank you.

0:49 All right, everybody, take a seat.

0:51 As you may have heard, our branch on the planet Jupiter is up 8,000% in sales.

0:57 Yeah, hold up.

1:03 That clock is slow.

1:04 It is 5:00.

1:06 I will see you all tomorrow.

1:08 Bye, Stanley.

1:09 Love you.

1:13 So long, Stanley.

1:14 Night, everybody.

1:20 What is this thing you just sent me?

1:22 Oh, it's really cool.

1:22 It's a picture of the most relaxing meadow you've ever seen.

1:25 Idiot.

1:26 I know what this is.

1:27 It's supposed to lull me into a sense of calm

1:29 and then a ghoul pops up and scares me.

1:31 Why would I do that, Dwight?

1:33 Of all people, I know that you're unscarable.

1:35 Damn right I am.

1:39 Oh, hello, relaxing meadow.

1:40 I'm so relaxed and calm looking at you right now.

1:44 Oh no, a scary ghoul just popped up.

1:46 I'm so scared.

1:47 I'm so scared.

1:48 Really?

1:49 Is this the best you could?

1:52 Jim,

1:51 how are you?

1:52 God, okay.

1:59 Mhm.

2:00 That is the best I can do.

2:02 At the Stanford branch,

2:04 they all play this World War II video game called Call of Duty,

2:08 and they're all really into it.

2:10 I'm told it started as a team building exercise.

2:13 Unfortunately, I really suck at it.

2:15 Oh, we didn't play many video games in Scranton.

2:20 Instead, we'd do stuff like uh Pam and I would sometimes hum the same

2:25 high-pitched note and try to get Dwight

2:27 to make an appointment with an ear doctor.

2:30 And uh Pam called it pretendinitis.

2:39 Why did you do that?

2:41 Just killing Germans anyway I can.

2:42 We're on the German team.

2:45 Shoot the British.

2:49 Wait, are we playing teams?

2:53 Yeah.

2:52 Yeah.

2:52 I think we can be a big help to your company.

2:55 Okay.

2:56 See you next week.

2:57 Bye.

3:03 Again.

3:02 Scared Call of Duty.

3:08 Andy Jim, can I see you in the conference room for a minute

3:11 now?

3:10 Yes, now.

3:11 Put the game on hold, everyone.

3:13 This is not working.

3:14 Okay.

3:14 We are getting slaughtered out there.

3:16 It's the new guy.

3:18 Oh, I'm I'm sorry.

3:19 I don't know what we're talking about.

3:20 See what I mean?

3:21 We just need a strategy.

3:22 Okay.

3:23 We're going to set up a trap in the gun room.

3:25 All right.

3:25 Jim, are you using the MP 40 or the 44?

3:28 Um, SNIPER RIFLE.

3:30 SNIPER.

3:30 WHAT?

3:30 JIM, ARE YOU PLAYING?

3:31 THEY CARRY OTHER TEAMS.

3:32 YOU DON'T SNIPE IN CARRINGTON.

3:34 OKAY.

3:36 SABOTUR.

3:36 SABOTUR.

3:37 I'm going to kill you for real.

3:40 This game The game is over.

3:41 I'm really going to shoot you.

3:46 Look how cute he is.

3:48 And he's trying to shoot with a smoke grenade.

3:51 I'm sorry.

3:51 What are you whispering at me?

3:53 Nothing.

3:53 You just concentrate on turning around.

3:55 Yeah, I'm trying.

3:56 I just just tap S then D.

4:01 Oh, any last words?

4:02 No.

4:04 What?

4:08 Wow.

4:10 It's like go path.

4:18 Ryan's assistant told us that he would be at this club this evening.

4:22 It is called prerogative.

4:29 Place is packed.

4:30 Fire hazard.

4:32 Packed with beautiful babies, swingers.

4:37 Classic.

4:39 John Fabro, tall guy from dodgeball.

4:42 These women look like white slaves.

4:44 No, they are just hot hotties.

4:47 I don't know, man.

4:47 I mean, when you think about it, Cabo is really the third world.

4:50 I don't go to a place like that to see more poverty.

4:52 You know, you go there to get some glamour.

4:56 Michael.

4:57 Hey,

4:57 what are you doing here?

4:58 Well, you know, just taking you up on your offer to party.

5:01 So, tada.

5:02 That is so awesome, man.

5:04 All right.

5:05 And you brought this guy.

5:08 Yeah.

5:08 Oh,

5:11 Brian, it's Michael and Dwight.

5:13 I know it's you guys.

5:15 Okay.

5:14 I'm so psyched you're here.

5:17 Well, let's get a drink.

5:20 Let's do it.

5:24 I um thought about getting a tattoo on my back as well.

5:27 At one point, I was thinking about getting Back to the Future.

5:30 Back because it's on my back and future because I'm

5:34 the kind of guy who likes to look ahead into the future.

5:37 I just think a tattoo should mean something, you know?

5:41 And it's my second favorite movie.

5:43 I've never heard of that movie.

5:44 Back to the Future.

5:46 Oh, wow.

5:47 Well, you should take a a film education course.

5:51 How old are you?

5:52 40.

5:52 I'm I'm in my 40s.

5:55 Wow, that's so cool.

5:58 Yeah.

5:58 Well, I'm going to go back to my group now.

6:01 Oh, okay.

6:02 Thanks for the drink.

6:02 You are welcome.

6:08 I've never met anybody who does that.

6:10 You wash dogs.

6:11 Very cool.

6:12 That's one aspect of small pet grooming.

6:14 What do you do?

6:15 I am a bank teller.

6:16 Brian told me to always tell women you work in finance.

6:20 Cool.

6:21 I think so.

6:22 Yeah.

6:22 Yeah.

6:22 I have fun.

6:23 I'm just going to use the powder room.

6:25 All right.

6:25 So, I'll see you soon.

6:26 Very perfect.

6:33 Oh my goodness.

6:36 This needs to be shared.

6:48 She washed his dogs.

6:49 You're doing it, man.

6:50 I know.

6:50 I don't want to get ahead of myself, but I think I want her to meet my mom.

6:55 Hey, man.

6:56 You ever think there's going to be this massive

6:58 nuclear holocaust and after all the major nations are destroyed,

7:01 it'll just be the tribes in the jungles that rise up and survive?

7:04 The jungle warfare is going to rule the world.

7:08 Yeah, maybe.

7:18 It's inevitable, right?

7:23 I am I am getting out there.

7:26 Well, no.

7:27 I've asked a lot of girls to dance.

7:29 Mom, they're just It's not What you listen to me for a second?

7:34 Yes.

7:35 I should back in my neck.

7:37 Oh my god.

7:38 Mom, I got to go.

7:39 One of my friends is getting beat up by some girls.

7:42 This is a one time thing.

7:43 You know that, right?

7:46 Wow.

7:46 This is it.

7:47 All right.

7:48 This is where the magic happens.

7:52 Nice.

7:51 Very nice.

7:51 One of you can have the sofa

7:53 and one of you can have the floor.

7:54 I got the sofa.

7:55 I got sofa.

7:56 Dwight, I've got the sofa.

7:57 I'm the boss.

7:58 I got floor

7:59 in case anybody needs to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.

8:01 I don't want to get my head stepped on.

8:02 Do you want me to sing you a song my mother used to sing me when we were sick?

8:07 No.

8:12 Leave them alone.

8:12 It's a lullabi.

8:14 Sh.

8:15 Ryan.

8:15 Ryan, we're going to take your clothes off.

8:17 Oh, guys, I think my friend Troy might have a drug problem.

8:27 What do I do?

8:29 I think his species might have a higher tolerance than ours.

8:32 Shh, just stop.

8:34 Here's what you do.

8:37 You tell him that you're his friend and that you're going

8:40 to help him and that everything's going to be all right.

8:45 And then you put a wire on him and you find out who's selling him drugs.

8:51 And then you get that guy and you flip him and turn him into a snitch.

8:55 You follow that guy.

8:57 It's the people who are really, really bad.

9:00 Been watching The Wire recently.

9:02 I don't understand a word of it.

9:04 Guys, I'm going to sleep.

9:05 You can leave the light on if you want, but please stop talking.

9:08 Okay.

9:08 Okay.

9:09 Okay.

9:09 Good night, Ryan.

9:15 Best night ever.

9:18 Oh, yeah.

9:20 This will be easy.

9:21 So, just like rearrange the buttons and stuff.

9:24 Yeah.

9:24 Yeah.

9:24 Like when he presses door close, the doors open.

9:26 Or he presses lobby, it goes to third floor.

9:28 Stuff like that.

9:29 Can you do that?

9:30 Yeah.

9:30 Let me take a look at the circus board.

9:33 Dwight is about to get so pam.

9:37 Hey, did you SMS text message me?

9:39 Yeah.

9:39 I wanted to show you something in the lobby.

9:41 Uh, come on.

9:48 Okay, that's weird.

9:50 H just hitting door closed.

9:51 What?

9:52 There we go.

9:53 What?

9:55 Good.

9:54 Is this elevator going up?

9:57 Hey, the elevator's just disobeying us.

10:02 Okay.

10:02 Okay.

10:03 We are stuck.

10:04 We are stuck.

10:05 Hank.

10:05 Hank, can you hear us?

10:08 Oh my god.

10:08 Okay.

10:09 Emergency protocol.

10:10 Um, just calm down,

10:12 Pam.

10:12 Try and pry open those front doors immediately.

10:15 I don't

10:15 Use your talons.

10:16 PRY THEM OPEN.

10:18 OKAY.

10:18 OH MY GOD.

10:19 WELL, DON'T LOOK, FRANK.

10:21 DWIGHT, what are you doing?

10:22 We've only been in here for like 2 seconds.

10:24 I GOT 56 OUNCES OF FLUID IN MY BLADDER, AND WE HAVE TO ESTABLISH A pee corner.

10:29 You've got to be kidding me.

10:33 Pam.

10:32 Oh, hey, Jim.

10:34 Some prankster switched the elevator buttons on Dwight.

10:37 I did not do this.

10:39 I know.

10:43 Yeah.

10:44 And it was going really great at first.

10:46 I got video.

10:48 This is impressive.

10:49 Well, you know, they don't call me the Bart Simpson of Scranton for nothing.

10:53 Do they call you that?

10:54 They do call me that.

10:58 Uhoh.

10:58 Just a second.

11:00 So glad we were finally able to do this.

11:02 No.

11:03 No.

11:03 Okay.

11:04 Come on.

11:05 Tuna.

11:05 What's up, Tuna?

11:06 We going to have some tuna for dinner?

11:08 I bet you're sick of tuna, right?

11:10 You probably have tuna every night.

11:11 All right, tuna.

11:14 These are for you.

11:15 Oh, how awful.

11:16 Very nice.

11:17 Except for one flower, which is for my flower.

11:22 Oh, what am I supposed to do with this?

11:25 I'll let you take

11:25 Well, how about we do the short tour and then I'll start dinner.

11:28 Oh, I can help starting dinner if you need it.

11:31 Oh, no, no, no.

11:31 Just the asabuku needs to braze for about 3 hours.

11:33 Everything else is done.

11:36 3 hours from now or 3 hours from earlier?

11:38 like 4:00.

11:39 You know, Pam, in Spain, they often don't even start eating until midnight.

11:44 When in Rome, you have a preference upstairs first.

11:48 Whatever you say, babe.

11:49 Follow me.

11:50 All right.

11:53 Not even close.

11:55 So, we keep a very tidy house.

11:57 You should see our bathroom after Michael takes a bath.

12:01 But I don't have to tell you, Pam.

12:05 Yeah.

12:06 What?

12:06 Oh, well, don't tell me that he's really changed since you guys dated.

12:10 Oh, are are you joking?

12:12 Michael told me a little bit about it, but I see the way you look at him.

12:16 I have never ever dated or wanted to do anything resembling dating Michael.

12:22 Ever.

12:22 Not ever.

12:23 Not now.

12:24 Not then.

12:24 Not now.

12:25 Not ever.

12:26 Ever.

12:27 Notice how you look at him at the office.

12:31 Mhm.

12:40 quite turkey like just going to check on dinner.

12:50 Angela, would you like some of my beet salad?

12:52 I hate beet salad.

12:53 It's actually really good.

12:55 Hey, hey, hey.

12:57 I know you love beet salad.

12:58 I've seen you eat it many times.

13:00 The thought of popping one of your beets into my mouth makes me want to vomit.

13:08 I hope she didn't do anything to the food.

13:12 Like, like what?

13:13 I can't prove it, but I think she might be trying to poison me.

13:23 Hey, looks great, babe.

13:25 Yeah, really does.

13:26 I know Jan didn't poison the food.

13:28 I know that.

13:29 But if she was going to poison the food

13:31 of someone at that table, wouldn't it be me?

13:34 Michael's former lover.

13:43 Can you not do that?

13:44 It's disgusting.

13:48 You know I have soft teeth.

13:49 How could you say that?

13:52 Oops.

13:54 Excuse me for a second.

14:01 So, how do you guys know each other?

14:06 I was his babysitter.

14:08 And now you guys are dating.

14:10 It's purely carnal.

14:11 That's all you need to know.

14:14 Would you write down your email?

14:15 Because I have just so many questions.

14:20 Email.

14:21 Never mind.

14:23 Okay.

14:24 All right.

14:26 There we go.

14:35 There.

14:38 Oh,

14:40 okay.

14:40 It's nice.

14:41 Everybody enjoying their meal?

14:46 Hey, babe.

14:47 Yeah.

14:47 How about we take the beer sign down until

14:49 our guests leave and then we can discuss it?

14:51 No.

14:51 No.

14:52 I'm going to leave it up.

14:53 I think it ties the whole room together.

14:58 Okay.

15:04 Jan thinks Hunter is very talented.

15:07 You know what?

15:08 I don't think he's that good.

15:10 At least he's an artist.

15:12 BFD.

15:12 I'm a screenwriter

15:14 and I'm a candle maker, BUT YOU DON'T HEAR ME BRAGGING ABOUT IT.

15:17 NO.

15:17 ALL YOU DO IS YOU GET me to try to work on my rich FRIENDS

15:22 FOR AN INVESTMENT OPPORTUNITY.

15:24 MAN, I would love to burn your candles.

15:27 You burn it, YOU BUY IT.

15:29 OH, GOOD.

15:29 I'LL BE YOUR first customer.

15:31 You're hardly my first.

15:33 That's what she said.

15:46 THAT IS A $200 PLASMA SCREEN TV YOU just killed.

15:50 Good luck paying me BACK ON YOUR $0 A YEAR SALARY PLUS BENEFITS, BABE.

16:06 OH, that duck is so cute.

16:13 Hey, Pam.

16:14 Hey, guys.

16:18 Oscar, Angela, I didn't think you guys would come.

16:22 Why wouldn't we come?

16:25 Because of reasons.

16:30 Hey folks, what can I get you?

16:32 Oh, hi Mayor.

16:33 Hey.

16:33 Another vodka.

16:34 Yeah, Jack.

16:34 These are my co-workers.

16:36 What's up?

16:37 Ryan, Pam, Stanley, Kelly, Kevin, Creed.

16:41 How'd I do?

16:43 Come here much?

16:46 Kevin, you and Stacy set a date yet?

16:50 Yeah.

16:50 Oh my god.

16:51 When is it?

16:51 It's complicated.

16:54 I would appreciate some space on this.

16:57 Hey.

17:00 Hey.

17:00 You made it.

17:02 You said it was important.

17:03 So, how's it going?

17:06 What's up, Pam?

17:07 Hey, Kenny.

17:08 Sorry about the jet skis.

17:12 You guys uh want around on me?

17:15 Yeah.

17:14 Yeah.

17:15 Let's get you a drink.

17:16 Thanks, man.

17:17 No, thank you, Roy.

17:18 I You should get a fine.

17:22 One, two, three.

17:22 Up, Jenkins.

17:24 Down, Jenkins.

17:25 Go.

17:25 I think I heard the cord over here.

17:27 Where?

17:27 On this side.

17:28 No, it is definitely under one of these hands.

17:30 I kind of heard it on Royy's side, too.

17:32 No, it is here.

17:34 It's not here.

17:35 Not here.

17:36 Not here.

17:36 Not here.

17:38 Good thing you didn't listen to me.

17:40 Yeah.

17:40 Close.

17:41 Not here.

17:43 It's not here.

17:44 Hey, it's either here or here.

17:51 Not here.

17:54 Yes.

17:55 Nice job.

17:56 I can read you like a book.

17:58 You can't get anything from me.

18:02 Bottoms up.

18:03 Hey, Cream.

18:05 Hey.

18:05 What are you guys up to?

18:09 Hello.

18:09 You're the man, buddy.

18:11 I run a small fake ID company for my car

18:13 with a laminated machine that I swipe from the sheriff station.

18:20 Hi, Ryan.

18:24 Hey.

18:23 How are you doing?

18:24 I've I've missed you.

18:26 I miss you, too.

18:28 Don't you remember me?

18:31 Um, you got You got to give me a hint.

18:33 Um, did you meet me at the gym?

18:37 No.

18:37 Who the hell is Ryan talking to?

18:39 Are your client?

18:42 Oh, not again.

18:44 Melissa, daddy, wait for me outside.

18:47 God,

18:47 she is 16 years old.

18:49 What is wrong with you?

18:51 What happened?

18:52 Came right up to me.

18:53 No, no, no.

18:53 You playing this whole thing slinging

18:55 and slinging around a bar like some lowario.

18:59 No, no, no.

19:00 Don't apologize now.

19:01 You ought to stay away from my daughter.

19:03 You want to end up on the stone Phillips nasty man smoke.

19:05 Don't travel around.

19:13 Huh?

19:14 I'll be on your tail like a hot wind.

19:16 The goal of this meeting is to get everybody excited about their resolutions.

19:21 Who's been good about their resolution so far?

19:24 Erin, tell us about it.

19:26 Well, my goal was to learn a new word every single day,

19:29 and I must say that it is going immensely.

19:33 Cool.

19:33 Here's a little way to go gift from Saber.

19:39 Intercepted.

19:39 Hey, Gabe.

19:40 Oops.

19:40 Oops.

19:41 Creed.

19:41 I noticed you don't have a resolution on the board.

19:43 What's yours?

19:44 I want to do a cartwheel,

19:46 but real casual like not make a big deal out of it, but I know everybody saw it.

19:50 There's one stunning, gorgeous cartwheel.

19:53 How's it going?

19:54 I'm having a little trouble motivating.

19:56 One of the hardest parts about making resolutions is keeping them.

20:00 In fact, most resolutions are abandoned by February or sooner.

20:05 It's not a joke.

20:06 But that's okay because it's not about being perfect.

20:08 It's about trying.

20:10 In fact, why don't we go around and confess some

20:12 of the ways that we've already fudged on our resolutions?

20:14 Well, I said that I would eat more vegetables, and I haven't yet.

20:18 But it's okay.

20:19 I still have time since last year I ate none.

20:23 Okay.

20:23 Well, my confession is that today I had a sip of coffee.

20:27 But that's fine.

20:28 Is it?

20:28 Yes.

20:29 Because with all of your support, by this time next year,

20:32 maybe I'll be down to one glass of iced tea a week

20:35 next year.

20:36 Come.

20:36 I mean, what is the point?

20:37 What is the point of that?

20:39 I made a resolution to floss and I did it.

20:42 12:01 January 1st.

20:44 Bam.

20:44 Blood everywhere.

20:45 Well, not all of us are Michael freaking Scott.

20:48 What is wrong with you people?

20:49 Can't you stick to anything?

20:50 Erin, I want you to go to the kitchen and get me some vegetables.

20:54 Creed, you say you want to do a cartwheel?

20:56 Nothing's stopping you.

20:57 Come on, old man.

20:58 Do a cartwheel.

20:59 Well, I can't.

20:59 I don't know how.

21:00 You're just going to somersault around for the rest of your life.

21:02 And you know what's going to be on your tombstone?

21:04 Loser.

21:05 My tombstone's already made.

21:07 Thank you.

21:07 Just do a cartwheel.

21:08 This is all I could find.

21:12 Eat it.

21:13 You don't have to do that, Kevin.

21:15 Oh, no.

21:15 I'm glad this is happening.

21:17 Thank you, Michael.

21:19 Why are you eating stem first?

21:21 This is a new food for me.

21:22 How else should I eat it?

21:24 The other way.

21:27 Can I get some cheese whiz or Hollands?

21:30 No.

21:30 No.

21:30 No cheese whiz.

21:31 No holless.

21:32 No chocolate sauce.

21:33 Just eat it.

21:33 Come on.

21:34 Here comes the airplane.

21:35 There you go.

21:35 Open.

21:36 Open into the hanger.

21:37 There you go, Michael.

21:38 Yep.

21:39 Eat it.

21:40 Put it in your mouth and just eat it.

21:41 Take it.

21:42 God, I hate it.

21:42 I don't care whether you hate it.

21:44 You said you'd do it.

21:45 Eat it.

21:46 Eat it.

21:47 You're killing him, Michael.

21:49 All right.

21:49 All right.

21:49 All right.

21:50 Shh.

21:52 I ate some fluffy part.

21:53 Can I be bl

21:54 Let me see if you swallowed it.

21:55 Open your mouth.

21:57 Under your tongue.

21:59 Oh god, you guys are pathetic.

22:07 Can I get some candy or something?

22:09 No, you can't have any candy.

22:10 Get him water.

22:11 Okay, Michael, just settle down.

22:15 Um,

22:19 I just feel blocked.

22:20 I feel like I'm I'm living, but I'm not.

22:22 Hey, Ryan.

22:23 Always be.

22:24 How's your fart project coming?

22:26 That's real real classy, Kevin.

22:27 Hey, was it me or you that just shoved the butt end

22:29 of a pound of broccoli into my mouth because Michael told me to?

22:33 Me?

22:33 Kevin, don't.

22:37 Come on.

22:37 Oh, Pam, soda, caffeine.

22:40 Yeah, just a little.

22:41 I have a lot to deal with today.

22:43 Well, if you don't have to do them.

22:45 Ruth, what are you doing?

22:46 I could be pregnant.

22:48 Okay.

22:48 No.

22:49 Oh, my resolution was to get more attention.

22:51 Nope.

22:51 She's lying.

22:52 Hey, Ryan.

22:58 One, two, three.

23:01 I did it.

23:02 I did a cartwheel.

23:04 You god.

23:07 Okay,

23:06 that's it.

23:15 Lesson learned.

23:17 Look at where you're going to be doing the cartwheel.

23:20 So, look where you're going to be placing your hand.

23:22 So, pick a spot.

23:24 Mhm.

23:24 You ready to do this?

23:25 Yes, sir.

23:25 You know what?

23:26 I'm going to stay here as long as it takes.

23:27 I really appreciate that.

23:28 I'm going to spot you.

23:29 I'll spot you.

23:30 You don't

23:33 go.

23:34 I did it.

23:36 You did

23:37 the perfect car.

23:37 Well,

23:39 okay.

23:40 Good.

23:41 A rush.

23:41 That's all I had to do all year.

23:45 Congratulations.

23:45 All right.

23:46 Well, all right.

23:47 See you tomorrow.

23:50 All right.

23:51 I think you guys should be all set.

23:52 Oh, here's the corporate card for dinner.

23:54 Thanks.

23:55 And Karen, let's keep it to $20 a person this time.

23:58 Got it.

24:00 Once a quarter, the sales staff at this branch

24:02 has to stay late to do order form consolidation,

24:06 which amazingly is even less interesting than it sounds.

24:11 You guys ready to party?

24:14 What's that?

24:15 I said, are you ready to party?

24:19 Hey, Big Tuna, you ready?

24:23 Yep.

24:24 One, two, three, shut.

24:30 Oh, holy mother of God.

24:32 Oh, that burns.

24:35 One, two, three, shut.

24:47 I went to the doctor.

24:49 I went to the mountains.

24:51 I look to the children.

24:53 Andy, no acappella.

24:59 I look to the children.

25:01 I drink from the fountain.

25:09 Wait, wait.

25:11 Unless I seek my source.

25:15 Closer I am to find.

25:19 closer I am to find.

25:22 It's not good.

25:24 TUNA, are you kidding me?

25:27 Hey guys.

25:35 Hey, can I have a ride then?

25:36 I uh I have my bike.

25:39 No way, dude.

25:40 I am not driving home.

25:42 I brought an inflatable bed for just such occasions.

25:48 You're welcome to share it though.

25:49 It's a roomy twin.

25:54 Okay.

26:18 Hey, dummy.

26:19 Get in the car.

26:21 I'm the drunk driver.

26:23 Yes, you are.

26:24 Here, let me take that.

26:26 Just uh get in the car.

26:28 You can really hold your liquor belt, belly.

26:31 Yeah, you can't.

26:35 Okay.

26:35 And I am just going to lie down in the back.

26:37 That's all right.

26:38 Sure.

26:39 Here's your bag.

26:41 Just don't puke on anything.

26:49 You okay?

26:50 So good.

26:52 Good.

26:53 Hey.

26:54 Hey.

26:53 How'd the run go?

26:55 Uh, pretty good.

26:55 I finished.

26:56 That's great.

26:58 Why is that great?

26:59 Because he accomplished something.

27:01 What was your mile time?

27:03 About seven.

27:05 I could beat that on a skateboard.

27:06 Well, that has wheels.

27:08 Yeah, well, my feet don't.

27:09 And I could still crush that time.

27:11 Really, Dwight?

27:12 How fast are you?

27:13 Let's just put it this way.

27:14 Last weekend, I outran a black pepper snake.

27:19 Really, man?

27:18 What is taking Toby so long?

27:20 Oh, I'll just time him later.

27:22 And you'll compare the times?

27:25 Yeah.

27:25 Are you ready?

27:26 No.

27:27 My really tight.

27:28 I can't.

27:33 Am I being mean to Dwight?

27:36 I don't know.

27:37 Now, I did just make him run around the building,

27:38 and I have no intention of timing him.

27:41 This isn't even a stopwatch.

27:42 It's a digital thermometer.

27:46 He does make my life harder sometimes, and on purpose.

27:49 Like, he tried to put meters on the bathroom stalls

27:51 as a way of bringing in more money for the company.

27:54 Hey, three more laps to go.

27:57 You got to pick it up if you're going to beat Toby.

28:02 I should probably get back to work.