The Amazing Race | The Basement Yard #554

0:00 Welcome back to the basement.

0:06 Welcome back to the basement yard.

0:09 Hi.

0:09 Hello, everyone.

0:10 You're all buttoned up today.

0:11 Yeah, it's because I'm wearing an undershirt under here,

0:14 but it has a logo on it.

0:16 Oh, I see.

0:16 So, I don't want to show the logo.

0:18 Okay.

0:18 Not that it's like someone I don't like,

0:20 but like Now it feels like you have to show it.

0:24 No, I know.

0:24 No, but now I [laughter] You know what I mean?

0:26 Like You got to prove that it's not an offensive one.

0:28 Well, no, it's not.

0:30 What could it be?

0:30 I don't know.

0:32 Like a swastika or something?

0:33 I MEAN WHOA, DUDE.

0:37 [laughter] HOT START.

0:39 THAT?

0:39 DROPPED IT OFF.

0:41 a hard swastika.

0:43 Yeah.

0:43 Yeah.

0:44 Well, now you got to show it.

0:45 I Yeah, now I have to show it.

0:46 It's very clearly not It's Comdex.

0:49 Very the Oh, okay.

0:50 the furthest thing from What?

0:52 The one [laughter] of them, yeah.

0:54 Now that we know who it was, I don't know if they wanted that close.

0:58 [laughter] NOBODY WINS RIGHT NOW.

0:59 YEAH, NO.

0:59 NO.

1:00 We doubly lose.

1:01 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1:02 Sorry, we can just take that Sorry, we can just take that again from the top.

1:04 All right.

1:05 Hey, welcome back.

1:06 Oh, wow, you got to wear that.

1:08 Well, let you know, whatever.

1:09 Um You got some new hardware over there.

1:11 I got some bling.

1:12 Look at that.

1:13 Look at this.

1:14 Ant ran his first half marathon.

1:17 By the way, is it your first half half There we go.

1:21 Is it [laughter]

1:23 Is it your Is it your first half marathon or was it your only half marathon?

1:28 Got it.

1:29 Got it.

1:29 You know what I'm saying?

1:30 Like That's a That's an aggressive question off the off rip.

1:34 Well, I don't know how he's feeling.

1:35 How Well, START WITH THAT QUESTION THEN.

1:37 HOW ABOUT THAT?

1:40 SORRY.

1:41 WHAT DID I Sorry, [laughter] you're right.

1:42 You're right.

1:43 You're right.

1:43 I'm sorry.

1:44 I'm sorry.

1:45 You guys were accusing me of wearing propaganda on my shirt and stuff like that.

1:49 No, we [laughter] were making sure that no one was coming to that conclusion.

1:52 Now it's propaganda.

1:53 YEAH.

1:53 WELL, [laughter] UM BUT ANYWAY, RIGHT.

2:00 SORRY.

2:00 Ran the marathon marathon half marathon in Brooklyn.

2:03 yeah.

2:03 The Brooklyn half marathon.

2:05 Yeah.

2:05 You did it.

2:05 And you just Let's get this out the way.

2:07 Yes, sir.

2:08 Awesome.

2:09 Congratulations.

2:09 Oh, thank you.

2:10 really, really cool.

2:11 You just decided you wanted to do it and just did it.

2:13 It was It was something.

2:15 It was something to do.

2:15 Lot of people.

2:16 Lot of people.

2:17 Did you You just See, like this is what people say like hardworking should be.

2:23 Gen Z, are you listening?

2:25 He just decided he wanted to do

2:26 something and pulled himself up by his bootstraps.

2:30 Mhm.

2:30 Yeah.

2:30 And did it.

2:31 Yeah.

2:32 He came out to see me.

2:33 At least he did.

2:35 And um That's crazy.

2:36 Wow.

2:37 [laughter] That's bananas.

2:38 See, now Now Now I need to be on the attack.

2:41 Yeah, [laughter] yeah.

2:42 Is that how you attack?

2:45 One more time, just give him an attack.

2:48 Very good.

2:50 [laughter]

2:49 Yeah, well, how how should I attack?

2:51 You tell me, Boxer Joe.

2:54 Definitely not like this.

2:56 [laughter] That's all I know.

2:57 I know that's incorrect.

2:58 No, I'm playing.

2:59 I'm playing.

2:59 It was nice.

2:59 How are your legs feeling?

3:00 They They hurt today.

3:01 The The right My right foot is not working.

3:06 That's bad.

3:08 [laughter] It's just like I'm I'm dragging it.

3:09 I mean, you're walking.

3:10 I'm dragging dragging it.

3:10 I'm limping a little bit.

3:11 Okay.

3:12 What shoes did you wear?

3:14 Do they do like a thing where like you can like run in like silly shoes?

3:18 Has anyone done like a marathon in like high heels?

3:20 Bro, when I ran the marathon, there was people barefoot.

3:24 Yeah, well, that's not cool shoes.

3:26 That's just no shoes.

3:27 But you can wear whatever you want.

3:28 Someone Someone ran a marathon in snow boots.

3:31 I mean, ski boots.

3:32 That is insane.

3:34 must be on fire.

3:35 Thighs.

3:36 The whole The whole legs.

3:37 Did you see the guy run the London Marathon with a fridge on his back?

3:40 Yes, I did see that.

3:43 It It was symbolic of something.

3:44 Oh, all right.

3:45 Oh, I don't know if there were symbols.

3:46 I don't know what that was about.

3:48 I think it was symbolic of something.

3:50 I did I did see that, but like Yeah,

3:52 I mean, you're you're asking for an injury at that point.

3:56 I mean, I mean Yeah.

3:57 All power to you.

3:58 I mean, someone argue that doing the marathon

4:01 in and of itself is asking for an injury.

4:03 Kind of, yeah.

4:03 Yeah, I couldn't walk last night.

4:05 I was just on the couch.

4:07 I was just sinking into it.

4:08 I was fine until mile like 9 and 10.

4:12 And that's when I felt like my legs were going to explode.

4:15 I did.

4:16 I took an ice bath, actually.

4:17 Ooh, did you throw some Epsom salt in that It was a very crude ice bath.

4:22 I didn't even know you're supposed to put salt in it.

4:24 I mean, Epsom salt.

4:24 You know what Epsom salt is.

4:27 What?

4:27 Is that the stuff you put on the street?

4:29 Uh no.

4:30 Why would you take a bath of stuff that melts snow?

4:33 Wait, Epsom salt might melt snow, too.

4:35 I don't If it does, I don't know, but I don't think they were salt.

4:39 When you get like like ice melt, it's not Epsom salt.

4:43 I don't think.

4:43 I mean, You know what?

4:46 I have no [laughter] knowledge of salt.

4:48 And I have nowhere to go from here.

4:50 Right.

4:51 But you've never heard of like when you're

4:52 taking a bath and you're trying to recover,

4:54 there's some like some salts that you can put in there that sort of like helps.

4:56 No, I used to do I don't know what it does.

4:57 It just makes me smell like lavender and I like that.

4:59 Oh, yeah.

5:00 We have a eucalyptus one.

5:01 I like that, too.

5:03 Eucalyptus is cool, but like it's so much.

5:06 I love it.

5:08 Sometimes it's too intense for me.

5:10 I got a sensitive nostrils.

5:11 We one time got like actual eucalyptus and like they

5:14 say like if you just like put it in your shower,

5:17 it like is like there's like health benefits to like all that I I I I can't

5:21 I can't I can't keep up with oils

5:23 and health and plants and There's a lot going on.

5:25 much going on about it.

5:27 Yeah.

5:27 People are just like, oh, oils and crystals and like that.

5:30 Let me just breathe oxygen and live that way.

5:35 my microplastics that's in everything?

5:38 I don't care.

5:38 Of course there's microplastics.

5:40 Of course there's forever chemicals.

5:42 Yeah.

5:42 What am I going to do?

5:44 If I have the forever chemicals in me, Which we do.

5:47 we're locked in forever.

5:48 Which like it's not an if.

5:49 We do.

5:50 Yeah.

5:51 Does anybody want to raise their hand if they've won

5:55 some sort of medal for running a marathon of any kind?

5:58 Don't do this, both of you.

6:00 Does anybody How about this?

6:02 How about we raise a raise our hands for raising three children?

6:07 [laughter]

6:07 Neither You put your hands down, Well, that's not what we're saying.

6:11 Yeah, no, no.

6:11 That's Yeah, that's a different So,

6:12 you're just throwing it in my face that I haven't run a marathon or half of one.

6:15 I said type of marathon.

6:16 Way to go.

6:16 You did half of an actual marathon.

6:18 [laughter] I said type.

6:20 I said type.

6:21 I said type.

6:22 I'll tell you what, after running the half,

6:23 it made me think that while doing double

6:26 this and running a full marathon feels impossible.

6:28 So, the fact that he did it is incredible.

6:29 I can't I I I would never be able to

6:31 It's mental.

6:32 I also had not run I practice I trained horribly

6:35 for the marathon and I I ran two halves before, but never ran further than that.

6:41 You hear this guy?

6:42 Mr.

6:43 Like, oh, man, I like didn't train

6:45 right before [laughter] I finished the full marathon.

6:49 I didn't train enough, so I only could have been better at it.

6:52 That is true.

6:53 I couldn't have been much worse.

6:55 Mhm.

6:55 But you finished.

6:56 You just finished.

6:57 That is And that like in all

6:58 the conversations we've had about this because jokes aside,

7:01 that is to both of you one of you more legitimately impressed.

7:05 [laughter] One One of us double.

7:06 One of us Yeah, like what you did was impressive times two of that.

7:10 That's very impressive.

7:11 Don't you

7:12 It's the mental It's the entirety of it is the mental as- aspect for me.

7:16 I I just can't do something that continuous and not

7:20 get bored and want to What if we bully you?

7:23 Bully with your wallet, then we're talking.

7:27 Bully with your wallet.

7:29 Then we're talking.

7:30 Then we can at least have a discussion.

7:31 Well, what if What if Or make a deal.

7:35 you Don't you want to just shut us up?

7:37 Yeah.

7:38 I mean, I think my pure existence to some degree just shuts you guys up.

7:43 What does that mean?

7:45 I don't know, but [laughter] I think that, you know, me being

7:53 Mhm.

7:51 a an upstanding member of this office,

7:55 a contributing factor, despite what Ant says, to this podcast,

8:00 [laughter] and and doing it while also being a model husband and father,

8:06 I think that that does pretty well for me.

8:09 Now, I do have a question about that last sentence.

8:11 When you said model husband, was there a comma in between those two things

8:15 or is it model husband or model husband and something else?

8:20 You're You're a model.

8:21 Technically, you are a model.

8:22 Technically, we are models.

8:24 We have done modeling.

8:25 You You're a model.

8:27 I We are models.

8:28 Don't just throw it at me.

8:30 Well, Well, we're talking about you right now.

8:31 so much.

8:32 You're a model.

8:32 Say it more.

8:34 I tried it and then you stopped me.

8:35 All right, keep keep doing it again then.

8:36 You're a model.

8:37 Thank you.

8:37 Well, so now he has the model and the medal, so not really one up.

8:40 I'd be a metal model.

8:44 I can't even keep up.

8:45 Yeah, now it's too much.

8:46 No, no, no.

8:46 What if we all ran a half marathon together?

8:48 I just I'm not kidding.

8:50 Here's the where I am mentally today.

8:52 Yeah.

8:55 Two 5Ks.

8:58 What?

8:58 Like, what does that mean?

9:00 I could see myself doing two 5Ks.

9:02 Yeah.

9:03 I I don't think I could do which is what?

9:05 A quarter marathon?

9:07 [laughter] It's 3.1 Do they do quarter marathons or third marathons?

9:09 It's It's a 5K or a 10K.

9:12 So, it's either 3.1 or 6.2.

9:14 I could do a 10K.

9:15 I don't know.

9:16 I could do a 10K.

9:17 A 10K would be a quarter-ish.

9:19 A little less than quarter of marathon.

9:20 Yeah, I just I I Like I said, I am I know what's going to happen

9:25 to my ego now that someone else here has done it.

9:28 He's going to He's wearing it, too.

9:30 And he's rubbing it in, too, which I don't like.

9:32 It's It's It's the day after.

9:33 Give me a day.

9:34 Oh, yeah, it was yesterday.

9:36 yesterday.

9:36 Yeah, as of recording.

9:37 As of recording.

9:38 As of recording.

9:39 I just I I don't know if that's a question I need answered right now.

9:42 I did tell you guys full transparency.

9:44 Tomorrow I'm going to go to the gym and just

9:45 see what happens when I get on the treadmill.

9:48 But I'm just What if something good happens?

9:50 We need to define what would be good.

9:52 I mean, it would be good.

9:53 So, help me.

9:54 So, I told you I haven't run I haven't run in 3 weeks.

9:56 Yeah.

9:56 So, what would you guys say?

9:58 I'll let you set the standard for what you think good is,

10:00 which can then adjust my mental capacity after.

10:03 Based on what you've said already,

10:04 you said that you've gotten on the treadmill

10:07 and you've run for like 25 minutes straight.

10:10 Mhm.

10:10 That is all you need.

10:12 That is a giant starting point.

10:14 The best like the the longest I have run distance 30 minutes straight.

10:21 That's hard to do.

10:22 at 5.5 miles per hour.

10:23 I mean, that's hard to do.

10:25 So if I do that tomorrow, Yeah.

10:28 you think that is a good jumping off point.

10:30 Of course.

10:31 You're essentially crushing 5K's already.

10:34 You're like right there.

10:35 Yeah, that's what that would be.

10:37 miles.

10:37 I just I want to make it very clear.

10:39 I can't commit to anything [laughter]

10:44 running running wise.

10:45 But it's 5 [laughter]

10:47 LET'S MAKE THAT CLEAR.

10:48 I can't commit to anything running wise until I start seeing like a Well,

10:55 what what does it really matter?

10:56 You know, what results, training, who cares?

10:59 And it's also 6 months away.

11:01 I I am just I'm saying like I need to like

11:05 You guys are going to bully me into doing it.

11:07 I'll sign you up.

11:07 I know what you're doing.

11:08 You're going to bully me into running.

11:10 I'll go with you.

11:11 I need to bully you into into making it fiscally Mhm.

11:16 more Well, how enchanting for me.

11:23 enchanting

11:22 enchanting Okay, Prince Charming.

11:24 Start a GoFundMe.

11:26 GoFundMe

11:27 we could do this.

11:27 A GoFundMe that get to $200,000 and then Frank will run a 5K.

11:34 200K for a 5K?

11:38 Yeah.

11:38 How about this?

11:39 Good for you.

11:39 50 bucks for every K.

11:40 What what happened What would you do or how would

11:42 you feel if cuz you signed up for October, right?

11:46 I didn't sign up for anything yet just in case we did do something.

11:50 Does that make sense?

11:51 Yeah, but we would do that.

11:52 Oh, so yeah, sure.

11:53 Um what if we both ran and then you didn't

11:55 run it and you were just kind of left out?

11:57 Now we got two medals.

12:00 I mean, are we medal chasing now?

12:01 Because then We're not medal chasing.

12:03 The reality is that I would do it

12:05 and with you two and then you'd have two medals,

12:07 you'd have two medals and I'd be at one.

12:09 But then you but but but you could beat him.

12:11 You could beat us both.

12:12 Let me be very clear.

12:13 If I'm running something with him, I'm beating him.

12:16 Well, that's what I mean.

12:17 That would mean you would have that.

12:18 You're not beating me.

12:20 Like are you kidding me?

12:21 He knows what he's doing.

12:21 He knows [laughter] what he's doing.

12:22 If it's a competition now, it's like I was running to finish.

12:25 But now you [laughter] I mean, YOU KNOW RIGHT OH, 5K.

12:32 I AM DUSTING YOU.

12:36 [laughter]

12:35 WHOA.

12:36 I'M LETTING YOU KNOW.

12:37 THAT'S my ego.

12:37 SEE?

12:38 YOU DID IT.

12:39 ARE YOU GUYS HAPPY NOW?

12:40 HERE WE GO.

12:41 I don't think there's medals in 5K's.

12:42 getting a real American athlete out of me.

12:44 There are medals in 5K's.

12:45 I've gotten one before.

12:46 medals in 5K's?

12:47 You're getting Oh, YOU SO YOU HAVE MULTIPLE MEDALS?

12:48 YEAH.

12:49 YEAH.

12:50 Oh my god, I'll never catch up to him.

12:51 You don't need to out met It's about just doing it.

12:54 When you cross the finish line, you're going to feel so good about yourself.

12:57 It's about the medals, baby.

12:58 Why do something if there is not a tangible thing

13:01 to be given to you to say good job doing it?

13:04 Well, that's that's my only rule when it comes to races.

13:06 If there's not a medal, I'm not doing it.

13:07 The only

13:09 [laughter]

13:08 That's how important the medals are.

13:10 reason that I did Radio City and MSG is cuz they gave us a cool little ticket.

13:15 know that we were going to get that, but that was cool.

13:16 know about you.

13:17 I knew I was getting that Oh, really?

13:18 No, I didn't know.

13:21 [laughter] Yeah, no.

13:21 You're going to pull out a real American athlete out of me now?

13:25 That's what you want?

13:26 You want to Americanize me like some old-timey football player or something?

13:30 Born here, whole life, our American.

13:36 [laughter] But like you like I just I don't know, guys.

13:39 I think it's clear Mhm.

13:41 that you I mean you've I mean, we just figured out we did some math back there.

13:46 We did math.

13:47 You've run close to 50 miles already this year.

13:50 And I've taken a couple weeks off.

13:52 And have you enjoyed that?

13:53 No.

13:54 But do you enjoy being able to say that I've I've traveled that far on foot?

13:58 I like looking at numbers and saying like that's that's a number, you know?

14:03 What No, I don't know at all what that means.

14:06 [laughter]

14:05 I like looking at numbers and being like correct.

14:08 But it's just cool like you texted us yesterday like I just ran my 100th mile.

14:12 Yeah.

14:12 And like looking back and putting a number to something like that is cool to me.

14:16 Yeah.

14:17 So that's why I did that.

14:18 And I was just like, "Wow, I've ran 50 miles so far this year."

14:20 You would be surprised how much of what

14:22 you're describing is the reason behind me running.

14:26 I just like to know that I've traveled that far.

14:28 I don't care about traveling that far.

14:30 I don't think of it in terms of like, "Wow,

14:31 I could drive I could have I've ran enough

14:33 to go from here to you know, Great Neck." No, no, no, I'm not [laughter]

14:37 I'M NOT THINKING ABOUT THAT.

14:38 I'M thinking about like wow, cool, 100 miles.

14:43 Like that's wild.

14:44 That that is a crazy number.

14:46 I don't know.

14:47 You don't think that you would finish [laughter] a half marathon and be like,

14:49 "Holy I actually did it." I'm sure I would.

14:52 I know myself.

14:54 When I dive in, I'm in.

14:57 You know what I mean?

14:58 Like When I I'm letting you know, I'm like jokes aside, In a what?

15:03 In a 5K, I'm dusting you.

15:05 is I'm talking I'm I'm at half marathons.

15:08 I'm past 5K's, dude.

15:09 Whoa.

15:10 That's crazy.

15:10 But also true.

15:11 But we should do a 5K.

15:13 All right, I'm in for know.

15:14 I'm not committing to anything yet.

15:15 I just need to make that abundantly clear because I'm a little baby boy, too.

15:19 What does that mean?

15:19 This is me.

15:22 [laughter] What does that mean?

15:22 You just You want to bully me into being a version of a This is virgin.

15:27 This is [laughter] You're going to bully me into being a virgin?

15:32 You You want to bully me into being some

15:34 like athletic version of myself and I don't like it.

15:37 What did I have for lunch today?

15:39 I don't know.

15:40 parm sandwich.

15:41 That's what you get with Frank.

15:42 It looked real good.

15:43 It It actually was like seriously good.

15:46 Yeah?

15:46 Like I'm Like I was kind of impressed.

15:49 I just didn't expect that.

15:52 Side note.

15:53 You want me to be like an athletic version of myself.

15:57 When like I'm BLT's, Megazords, and Miller Lites, baby.

16:02 asking you to say me to be Peyton Manning, Doug Wyckoff, or some like that.

16:08 Doug Wyckoff Why cough on these nuts when you CAN SWALLOW THEM?

16:13 GOT HIM.

16:13 OH, NO.

16:14 GOT HIM.

16:15 GOT HIM.

16:15 GOT HIM.

16:18 [laughter] WHY COUGH ON THESE NUTS WHEN you can swallow them?

16:25 That is insane.

16:26 [laughter] I never heard that one.

16:29 That was really good.

16:32 [laughter] No, yeah, you got him.

16:33 What is he giving you?

16:34 You already hit him with it.

16:35 You want to hit him No, no, I got to do a proper one.

16:37 All right, hit him with it.

16:38 Got him.

16:38 Got him.

16:40 [laughter]

16:40 You got me.

16:41 Why cough on these nuts when you can swallow And I didn't stumble through it.

16:45 Yeah, you got him.

16:46 I waited.

16:47 I sat back.

16:48 I I sat fastball and I swung away.

16:51 Well, there is consequences to things like that.

16:54 Yeah, that's And it's me filling out your information.

16:56 Yeah.

16:57 [laughter] I mean, they You're going to get something in the mail at your house.

17:01 It'll be a bib with a number on it.

17:03 And now you're going to be the guy that signed up and didn't do it.

17:05 Crazy.

17:06 No, listen.

17:07 [laughter] I know what you're doing.

17:10 This is what he did when we were playing Mario Kart.

17:12 Yeah.

17:13 Just like it's not that I'm good, you're just bad.

17:15 You know what I mean?

17:16 He's playing the games.

17:17 He's playing mind games with me.

17:18 You probably.

17:19 I mean, What what will happen if if he commits to doing a 5K and he smokes you?

17:24 He probably could.

17:25 I'm feeling like I'm more endurance So what happens though?

17:28 What is I don't know.

17:29 Well, when is the 5K?

17:30 Like this is all important.

17:31 Well, it doesn't There's 5K's all the time.

17:33 If it's tomorrow, yeah,

17:34 you probably got I do think and I I'm I'm not cuz I'm also just not a runner.

17:39 It's like teaching a fish how to climb a tree.

17:41 Neither am I though.

17:42 I forced my way into this.

17:44 But you you have forced your way into becoming a runner and now you are one.

17:48 But you saying I'm not a runner is like

17:50 this admission of like I just can't do it.

17:52 Like you can.

17:53 No, but like there there's a level of like natural ability you

17:56 need to have to kind of make the insertion into that lifestyle easier.

18:03 [laughter] insertion Like like like for instance, are you a gymnast?

18:06 No.

18:07 Could you be a gymnast?

18:09 Sure.

18:10 Yeah, that's everything.

18:11 But it it would be a more enjoyable experience if you had

18:14 more natural ability to that would be better suited for being a gymnast.

18:17 How am I going to get natural ability to get on the pommel horse?

18:21 That's what I'm saying though.

18:22 People have that whether it be flexibility or speed or dexterity or

18:26 I mean, you ran for a half an hour straight, dude.

18:27 That's that's not nothing.

18:29 I will tell you every second of that was miserable.

18:32 I know.

18:33 Every single second.

18:35 It's terrible.

18:36 I hate it.

18:37 But I love finishing it.

18:40 You You all you care about is finishing?

18:42 I care about the road toward finishing.

18:46 I feel like you're trying to [laughter] equate this to a vagina or something.

18:52 don't know.

18:52 I mean, maybe We'll talk We'll talk candidly amongst ourselves.

18:57 I mean, committing to like a 5K in June is not crazy.

19:02 I think if I were to wake up tomorrow, I could do a 5K.

19:04 Yeah, you absolutely could.

19:05 It's not like you can't finish a 5K.

19:07 I know I mean, I could walk it,

19:08 but I'm saying like I could do it non-stop running.

19:13 Yeah.

19:11 But I just don't want to.

19:13 But Like that's my thing, guys.

19:16 The noise is coming out of you.

19:18 What would you rather do?

19:19 Close your eyes real quick, both of you.

19:20 Close your eyes.

19:22 I'm serious.

19:23 Close your eyes.

19:23 I'm not going to do anything I'm going to fall for this, too?

19:26 All right, fine.

19:26 No.

19:27 I'm coughing on nuts already, so where am I going to go from here?

19:30 It's not a joke.

19:30 Yep.

19:32 Saturday morning, June 23rd, okay?

19:38 You wake up.

19:40 You have a hot dog or you go run a marathon.

19:44 What would you rather do?

19:46 Oh, by the way, What did I close my eyes?

19:50 What What was the point of that?

19:52 I'd rather have a hot dog.

19:53 It's 85° and sunny out.

19:57 But I'm not saying run a summer marathon, that's hard.

19:59 You said June.

20:00 I said a 5K.

20:02 I'm okay.

20:03 A 5K.

20:04 Think about this.

20:06 You run a 5K in the morning in the summer, right?

20:09 And you're all sweaty and whatever,

20:11 then you have a crisp light beer and a hot dog after.

20:17 That's honestly probably the closest thing that'll get me to do it.

20:20 I'm saying that that nothing feels better than that.

20:24 I just I just I just hate it.

20:29 [laughter] What are you guys on get?

20:30 I mean, so do I.

20:32 You don't have to do it, obviously.

20:34 I know, but you do.

20:38 I mean, [laughter] I I figure I know that, too.

20:42 No, no, no, no.

20:42 I also figure I just got a got them on you, a pretty good got them, too.

20:45 So, like, I'm riding high right now, so

20:47 if there's a chance to convince me, it's right now.

20:52 Is there is there a need for convincing when I just have all your info already?

20:56 You know?

20:57 Like, I could just sign you up.

20:59 And then if you lose to him in the race, who's to say?

21:04 I mean, I will flat-out say that if [laughter] I'm letting you know right now.

21:12 One of you guys is going to end up in the tent.

21:14 I will I will pass out [laughter]

21:18 and need an oxygen tank before I lose a race to you.

21:21 That's I think you would win the 5K.

21:26 I don't need that.

21:27 I think I think You have time.

21:30 And you just ran a half

21:30 You also have This is like, you know, you just you just won MVP.

21:36 This is like next If I beat you,

21:38 that's like you coming out the next year and hitting 200.

21:40 Yeah.

21:41 It's true.

21:43 I think So, if anyone here has something to prove, it's you.

21:47 [gasps]

21:48 Oh.

21:48 Yeah.

21:48 Now it's all All the pressure All the pressure's on you now.

21:51 Oh, I promise.

21:52 is pressure, so it is happening.

21:53 I didn't say that.

21:57 [laughter] Don't worry, I think you will win it.

22:00 See, the hesitation.

22:02 What is he saying here?

22:03 I could run it in work shoes, like dress shoes, and I could beat you.

22:08 Ooh.

22:08 Work shoes.

22:09 Yeah, I don't wear I [laughter] don't got to get dressed up for shoes?

22:13 Like like Like loafers?

22:15 Like loafers, yeah.

22:16 I I would just Please don't.

22:17 I would just take it more serious than you would.

22:20 And you would win now?

22:21 I mean, no.

22:25 [laughter] I don't get that.

22:25 What do you mean you'd take it more serious than me?

22:27 You would train harder?

22:29 Absolutely.

22:29 And but I think you'd win.

22:31 I don't know.

22:31 I think that I think I do believe that if Frank committed to being like,

22:35 "Okay, we're going to do it." that he would train harder than you.

22:38 Let me make something abundantly clear.

22:40 If I commit to anything, I'm confident I could do it well.

22:42 I live life by a very strict set of guidelines that if I'm going to do it,

22:47 I'm going to do it well.

22:48 Yeah, we got that in the New Year's episode.

22:50 I'm just saying, like, you guys think it's a joke.

22:53 It is not.

22:54 I'm not I remember someone in college I got into an argument

22:57 with someone in college because hindsight looking back on it,

23:00 it was probably tone-deaf that I said it, but I don't give a Ooh.

23:03 They said, like, go.

23:05 uh Oh, man, everyone that takes organic chemistry fails.

23:10 And I was like, "Oh, I I I probably wouldn't." And they're like,

23:13 "Well, it's hard." I was like,

23:14 "Yeah, I I get that, but like I just I'm confident in my skills." Right.

23:19 Same situation here.

23:20 How was that tone-deaf?

23:21 Uh because it got to a point where I was just like,

23:23 "I'm not saying you're dumb, I'm just saying I'm smarter, you know?" [laughter]

23:28 I'm not you, I'm better is what I'm trying to say to you.

23:32 Did you take the class?

23:33 No.

23:33 Ah.

23:35 [laughter]

23:36 Yeah.

23:36 Yeah, failed.

23:36 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

23:38 You know what I'm saying?

23:39 Like, it's it's Judging on how much you trained,

23:42 I think that he will train harder than you.

23:47 Yeah, but it's like Uh sure.

23:50 There's also a whole other part of this that I'm not even referencing.

23:54 Yeah.

23:54 I'm worried about my tummy.

23:56 What about it?

23:58 You know how Oh, there's it's lined with ports.

24:02 If I stop, I'm not starting.

24:06 You're fine.

24:07 It's a half an hour.

24:09 It's 40 minutes of your life.

24:10 June what?

24:11 We do late June?

24:12 We're not to look at the schedule.

24:14 Uh first of all, All right, I'm in.

24:19 I never committed.

24:20 It's a 5K.

24:21 So, now you're forfeiting.

24:22 I win automatically.

24:23 First of all, I hold the power here, Okay?

24:27 You can mark that in your little notebook.

24:29 You have no more paper left cuz you're unprepared,

24:31 just like you were for your half marathon that you did finish.

24:35 [laughter] Actually, I have the backside of all the sheets.

24:37 It's like double It's all there.

24:40 I would just need to be a really sick medal.

24:43 Honestly, that is very important, and it's in it and I I try to know

24:49 what the medal's going to look like before I get there.

24:50 How about the loser gives the winner their medal?

24:54 One of these?

24:55 Yeah.

24:55 Oof.

24:57 Oh, like I Like it's like a coronation.

24:59 Yeah, yeah.

24:59 You stand above him on a like a bench,

25:02 and then he has to and you bend down and he Well,

25:04 no, I'm supposed Like, the winner's supposed to be on the bench.

25:07 Yeah, that's what I said.

25:07 Oh, I thought you meant like the loser.

25:08 No, and he's like on the ground and he's got to like put it on you.

25:11 Or you have to kiss my feet.

25:13 Okay.

25:14 Now we're getting into crazy fetish stuff.

25:16 Woah, WOAH, WOAH, WHY NOT?

25:16 If you're so confident, we're talking about fetish stuff.

25:19 After the race, bare I'm not saying sexually kiss my feet.

25:22 After the race, barefoot?

25:23 After the race, barefoot?

25:24 Do I have to watch?

25:25 I don't want to be there for

25:25 You absolutely have to watch.

25:26 to see it.

25:27 Joe watches.

25:30 [laughter] Joe watches.

25:31 Okay.

25:31 All right.

25:31 The joke I I also think that there's

25:33 the the the joke that he's he would dust both of us.

25:37 Uh yeah.

25:37 Yeah, I'm smoking you guys.

25:39 Unless, you know, I'm in really good shape right now, too, running-wise.

25:42 Unless a cramp happens, you never know.

25:44 No, I don't I don't know.

25:45 I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I

25:47 I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I've seen enough videos of like people

25:50 running and then that song pops up, the Heinz No.

25:56 Lane.

25:56 Yeah.

25:57 Numbers in my I would stop and like put

26:00 your arm over me and we'd finish [laughter] together,

26:02 you know what I mean?

26:03 I wouldn't I wouldn't be able to Pick me up.

26:05 I'm going back, pissing on your face, and then I'm [laughter] running more.

26:09 Damn, he's crazy.

26:10 It's going to be one of those moments where

26:11 Frankie's at the finish line and he sees me coming, but he sees Joe stumble.

26:14 He's like, "I got to go back.

26:15 I can't." Here's the only way I would do it.

26:17 If we all wore shirts with Mario Kart build-outs on it, like our character,

26:22 our cart, and everything, so I could say I finally beat you in real Mario Kart.

26:25 Wow.

26:26 What we would have to do is pick each other's shirts, probably.

26:28 All right, that's funny.

26:30 Okay, let me let me now start putting what

26:32 I need in order for this to make this happen,

26:34 and that's just the freedom to wear whatever I want.

26:38 Okay.

26:38 I think that makes it less interesting if you get to do whatever you want.

26:41 You want me to dress up like Bowser?

26:44 I mean, you said Bowser.

26:45 Honestly though, that's pretty cool.

26:48 That's funny.

26:49 I'm not dressing up like Bowser.

26:51 Why?

26:51 I don't know.

26:52 Do they have like Nintendo 5Ks?

26:54 They have everything.

26:55 What could that possibly mean?

26:56 I don't know.

26:57 Like you're like the medal you get is like the power-up mushroom.

27:00 Oh, honestly [laughter] Honestly, they could, I don't know.

27:03 People had that on signs throughout the whole race.

27:05 It was very nice.

27:06 Oh, like power-up?

27:07 Yeah.

27:07 Yeah, yeah.

27:08 I hit them all.

27:09 Yeah, you got it.

27:09 We know you did, dude.

27:10 Whenever I see a dog, would you drink for your pre-race prep, Yoo-hoo?

27:16 No, I had electrolytes.

27:17 Mile 10 though, Danny and JT hit me with a surfside.

27:19 Crucial.

27:20 What flavor?

27:21 I see.

27:22 Crucial surfside.

27:24 Crucial surfside.

27:25 really crucial.

27:25 Okay, so there is one on uh June 21st.

27:32 No.

27:33 There's also June 16th if that makes you feel better.

27:35 Oh, also no.

27:37 Right.

27:39 [laughter] June 21st?

27:40 Okay.

27:41 I mean, that's the First of all,

27:42 that's the day after my son's birthday, which you both have been invited to.

27:47 Yeah, dude, get up early.

27:50 [laughter] So, we'll all be there.

27:51 day before I will be eating all of the hot dogs and every beer.

27:54 How about this?

27:55 There's the the Brooklyn Ice Cream Social 5K.

28:00 Do you like ice cream?

28:01 So, look at this.

28:03 Look, this is the medal, an ice cream cone.

28:06 It's a trophy.

28:07 Oh, that's actually pretty cool.

28:08 That's good.

28:09 a cool one, but And you get ice cream at the end.

28:12 Oh, so I get run with a bunch

28:13 of Brooklyn hipsters who are probably walking with their dog?

28:16 No, thanks.

28:17 When's that?

28:19 July 25th, 5 days before your birthday.

28:22 No, actually, I have something the day

28:24 before in Atlantic City, so won't be there.

28:27 There's no way.

28:28 I can't do July.

28:29 Then there's the Haunted Island 5K in October.

28:32 I do like spooky stuff.

28:34 Yeah, but at that point we're so close to the October,

28:36 just do the half marathon.

28:37 It would be smart if they did like a 5K,

28:40 but like you're chased by zombies or something.

28:42 That would be cool.

28:43 That would be kind of That would be cool cuz then I would I think I'd do better.

28:46 Because like when I get chased by things, which doesn't happen often, but the

28:52 [laughter] the idea definitely motivates me more to like, "Oh, no." Um so,

28:56 how about if I just pay an extra participant

28:59 in this 5K and I dress him up as a ghoul,

29:03 and I have him about six steps behind you the entire time?

29:06 Why Why don't you get in touch with Doug Weitkoff's family?

29:09 Yeah.

29:10 Like, why cough when you could swallow these nuts?

29:14 And on that note, we do have some sponsors.

29:16 [laughter]

29:18 Yeah.

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33:38 Ooh.

33:39 All right, I think it's my turn.

33:41 Can you guys close your eyes for me?

33:42 I want you to imagine something.

33:43 my eyes again.

33:44 This is crazy.

33:45 you.

33:45 So, your eyes are closed.

33:46 No, no, I won't prank you.

33:47 So, your eyes are closed.

33:48 Yep.

33:49 You are seeing a big tray of buffalo wings.

33:53 Hell yeah, dude.

33:54 Now, this is what I'm talking about.

33:55 running.

33:56 Okay, you open [laughter]

33:58 you open your eyes and these are the options you have.

34:00 Which one are you picking first?

34:02 Which wing are you selecting first?

34:05 That's a good question.

34:08 [sighs] [snorts] I have an answer.

34:09 Those are sauced dude.

34:11 I think I have like the answer.

34:14 I think I know I have I have the answer as well.

34:17 Ah.

34:17 Should we say it at the same time?

34:19 Um probably not.

34:21 Okay.

34:22 I'm going to go my number I'm going to go my number one.

34:24 I'll tell you the worst one I see right now as well.

34:26 Oh, you want to do that?

34:27 Let's start with the worst one.

34:28 Oh.

34:29 Worst one I think is number six.

34:31 No.

34:31 Six?

34:32 11.

34:33 11?

34:34 11.

34:34 Dude, 13.

34:36 11 has nothing on it.

34:37 Yeah, but 13 has the broken bone Oh, yeah, that's bad.

34:41 No.

34:41 That's bad.

34:42 11 is pretty bad, but also six like that's the one you

34:45 bite into and it's mostly cartilage and it's not like enough actual meat.

34:48 Six looks fine.

34:50 The best one.

34:52 Okay.

34:52 Easily.

34:53 Easily the best one is 14.

34:56 Yep.

34:57 100%.

34:58 14 is the one.

34:59 14.

35:01 What?

35:00 You don't like 14?

35:01 one is seven.

35:03 Are you out of your mind?

35:05 That's a drumstick.

35:07 a drum.

35:07 No, flats over drums.

35:10 Flats?

35:09 Flats, baby.

35:10 You're a drumstick kind of girl?

35:12 You two are those.

35:13 All right.

35:13 THOSE ARE WHAT?

35:14 EVERYBODY!

35:15 WE ARE THE WE are the world.

35:17 We are the children, okay?

35:19 the world.

35:20 We [screaming] are the world.

35:21 We are the children.

35:23 We are the children.

35:25 We are the fight.

35:26 We are the savior.

35:28 So, let's start giving.

35:30 And you're nobody.

35:32 If you're going flat, the 12 is better.

35:34 The 12 or the 10 is better than the 14.

35:37 Here's the thing about 14 is that it's an even

35:40 cook and it's a good sauce application on there.

35:43 And she's and she's got meat on her and there's a ton of sauce on it.

35:47 Yeah, hell yeah.

35:48 Like that's number one.

35:49 I will also, first of all, I would go any flat on there over any drum on there.

35:55 Seven is an outrageous answer, by the way.

35:58 It's the best-looking wing.

36:00 No, it is absolutely not.

36:01 Four is better.

36:03 Three is even better than seven.

36:06 Three is really good.

36:07 Wait, there's one that's not labeled that kind of has a fat ass right under six.

36:10 What is that about?

36:11 What's going on there?

36:11 Yeah, I think it got cut off.

36:12 Yeah, I don't know what's going on there, but she's got the potential to her.

36:16 16, throw it out or I'm going to scream.

36:20 Well, 16 might be a deceptive picture cuz it just might be from a weird angle.

36:24 You know what I mean?

36:25 Maybe.

36:26 13 is bad.

36:27 Really, really bad.

36:28 11 is probably the worst one there.

36:29 I would say the best drum on there could be three.

36:32 I would agree.

36:33 Three looks like a drumstick.

36:35 Three and seven have to be the best ones on there.

36:37 you like drums.

36:38 Seven is Seven is not even like top five.

36:40 Oh.

36:41 Yeah, seven's crazy.

36:42 Seven is so bad.

36:43 Nine is better than seven.

36:45 I agreed.

36:46 Eight.

36:47 Oh my god, eight is a lovely little leg.

36:48 Dude, four is a good-looking wing, dude.

36:50 You you know what's a sneaky good one?

36:52 Five.

36:53 Because you get your thumb in there and push the meat off.

36:55 Whoa, dude.

36:56 Thumb, dude.

36:56 That was crazy.

36:58 Thumb.

36:58 Get your thumb in there?

36:59 it's like you I'm not doing it.

37:01 Dude, how do you eat these things in public?

37:02 all, yeah, why are you using your thumb to eat chicken wings?

37:05 I'm saying you push like you you grip the bone, you push it down.

37:07 I can't be doing this.

37:08 I mean, people who are just audio are probably like,

37:10 what are they talking about?

37:11 Yeah, go show us how you grip from the base and push down with your thumb.

37:15 Thumb.

37:15 Yeah, yeah.

37:16 Two's got a good coating on it.

37:17 Wait, how do you Serious question.

37:20 If you're going and I want a visual representation of what I'm asking.

37:23 Oh, boy.

37:24 If you're going to eat five, how are you eating it?

37:27 Depends how I'm feeling.

37:29 Normally, I would just rip the bone apart, take one out,

37:31 and then I eat it like a drum anyway.

37:33 See, what but why are you trying to civilize chicken wings?

37:37 Civilize?

37:38 They're meant to be filthy.

37:40 Okay, so even if you do it the way where you

37:41 just put the whole thing in your mouth and you pull,

37:43 the the five has a good thumb hold right there.

37:48 [laughter]

37:47 Wait, how do you eat chicken wings?

37:49 Well, flat or drum?

37:50 You got to tell me.

37:51 A flat.

37:51 A flat?

37:55 You you shove the whole flat in your mouth?

37:57 I the whole flat in my mouth and I pull out.

37:59 You pull you chew teeth And then if there's if there's anything in the middle,

38:02 I hold it sideways and I I break through.

38:07 Oh, I see.

38:08 How do you?

38:09 Um I'll do that if they're like super tender,

38:12 but I don't like leaving a bunch of meat in the middle

38:14 that But I got to like fish out when I'm done.

38:16 I'm telling you right now,

38:18 there's more meat on a T-Rex carcass than there

38:20 is on those wings when I'm done with them.

38:25 Okay.

38:25 There's no There's no meat left on a T-Rex carcass.

38:27 All right, I was trying to figure out what you meant by that.

38:30 bones now.

38:30 Got that.

38:31 Oh.

38:32 Yeah, I didn't know I thought I was like, what?

38:35 Um but or there's sometimes where like if

38:37 it's not coming off like that, then I'll

38:40 I'll uh You ever do the thing where you just press down and it just comes off?

38:45 No.

38:46 That's what I was saying.

38:47 Well, I've never done that.

38:48 That's what I was saying, the thumb thing.

38:49 But like it looks cool when people do it.

38:50 I'm like, oh.

38:51 Wings Wings are one of the foods that like I

38:53 fully sac Like I I I submit myself to the mess.

38:59 Because like there's certain foods that like you know they're going to be messy,

39:03 but you try to not get it let it be messy.

39:05 You know what I mean?

39:05 Like everyone does the twirl with the spaghetti and like you avoid the mess.

39:10 people who eat spaghetti with a spoon and a fork, come on.

39:14 People do that.

39:15 I get it.

39:16 I'm not going to I'm not that upset.

39:17 But don't slurp either.

39:18 Don't be slurping spaghetti.

39:20 I I understand the upset being upset about a slurp.

39:23 I I I sneak a slurp in every now and then.

39:25 What about soup?

39:25 Are you just like a loud slurper like that?

39:28 there's but I'm not doing it to be like annoying.

39:30 Every now and then a slurp sneaks in.

39:33 And that's just because it's just sometimes it's too hot and I want to eat it.

39:38 So, you slurp?

39:40 Just like just to like like I said,

39:42 it's like a bit of a litmus test just to see how hot it is.

39:46 Yeah, but that's not slurping.

39:47 Slurping's like Well, then I have to Yeah.

39:51 You know?

39:52 But then once I'm like, "Oh,

39:53 this is good." I'll either just drink it or I'll just like spoon it.

39:57 Yeah.

39:58 Most of the soups that I have now, I drink like it's a cup.

40:02 Like you ever order like sushi and it comes with a miso soup?

40:06 Yeah.

40:07 I just take it and I drink it like it like that.

40:09 Yeah.

40:09 Yeah, it's fun.

40:10 Yeah, I like it.

40:11 New way of doing stuff.

40:11 Oh, what do you do?

40:13 Me?

40:13 With a straw?

40:14 No.

40:16 You are a straw guy, though.

40:17 I love straws.

40:18 I huge I don't know if this came up on the show or not.

40:22 When we went to Austin, this dude had straws in his luggage.

40:26 All right.

40:27 You brought straws.

40:28 Hey, man.

40:29 That's stupid.

40:30 And shot glasses.

40:32 We used both things.

40:34 First of all, you and Greg used the shot glasses to take shots of rosé.

40:39 That's such a Greg's thing.

40:40 It's Greg's idea, yeah.

40:41 Yeah, of course that's Greg's idea.

40:42 That is I mean I get it cuz you don't want

40:44 to share the bottle and stuff like that, but there was also

40:48 There's cups.

40:49 There's also cups everywhere.

40:50 There's cups everywhere.

40:51 And like normally like Airbnbs will have wine

40:54 glasses as like one of the like cup options.

40:59 Yeah.

40:59 So, I don't get bringing shot glasses.

41:02 Oh, you know what it it's the party.

41:04 Yeah.

41:05 The party's here.

41:06 I don't know what you guys do without me.

41:09 Don't take shots.

41:11 No, no, not the shots.

41:11 We didn't even take shots.

41:12 I'm saying like You guys were playing with my switch.

41:15 If I wasn't there, I don't know what you guys were What were you guys doing?

41:17 If I wasn't there, just staring at each other?

41:19 But yeah, BUT I MEAN YEAH.

41:20 CONVERSATION.

41:22 [laughter]

41:22 THE SWITCH WAS MASSIVE, I will say that.

41:23 I'm not I didn't say anything about the switch.

41:25 The shot glasses, though.

41:26 What what would we do without you?

41:28 Let's look at the 33 years of history

41:30 before I don't know what you guys were doing.

41:33 We [laughter] were partying.

41:34 know what YOU GUYS WERE DOING.

41:35 WE WERE PARTYING, BEER PONG, BEER PONG FLIP CUP, GUYS.

41:39 [laughter] HEY GUYS, GUESS WHO SHOWED UP?

41:40 THE GUY THAT has shots in his luggage.

41:42 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

41:44 I I have Yeah, I don't know.

41:46 I should I don't know.

41:47 The I I get like the idea.

41:49 I'm just prep It was just in case.

41:51 It was just prep.

41:52 Also, we got stuck there St.

41:53 Patty's Day.

41:53 They came in real handy.

41:56 I like you say came in handy as if you were in the third

41:58 world and you wouldn't have been able to find shot glasses anywhere.

42:01 have to.

42:01 You were in Austin, Texas.

42:02 So, we didn't [laughter] have to.

42:03 You were in Austin, Texas.

42:04 You could have walked down the street

42:06 to a CVS and gotten disposable shot glasses.

42:08 We we did do a shot of Jameson, which I did not want to do.

42:11 No, he did not.

42:12 But I was I was bullied into that.

42:14 No disrespect to the Jameson team.

42:17 Days of drinking Jameson are long behind me.

42:19 Yeah.

42:19 Just like days of drinking Dude,

42:21 I was a big Jack Daniel's fan to the point where it was a problem.

42:25 I loved Jack Daniel's probably as much as I assume Kid Rock does Yeah.

42:31 back in the day.

42:31 I had Jack Daniel's and probably had a picture

42:34 of me holding it and then the picture of you know,

42:37 John Belushi chugging it with a sweater that says college.

42:40 Yeah, yeah.

42:40 You know what I'm talking about?

42:42 Also, when Jack Daniel's came out with like the honey Dude,

42:46 that's Hold on, though.

42:47 I do want to say that Remember, this was a couple years ago,

42:52 but but Jack Daniel's and Coke made the the Jack and Daniel's Coke.

42:57 good, dude.

42:58 and Cokes in the can, I was like, this is innovative and genius.

43:01 I I'm not kidding when I say this.

43:04 I was a big Jack and Coke drinker for years and years and years.

43:08 only cocktail I knew.

43:09 Years and years and years.

43:11 I've seen like bottled or canned cocktails and I've tried a couple.

43:16 The only one that I believe is like exactly what it was when you get it

43:21 made at like a bar or something or make

43:22 it yourself was the canned Jack and Coke.

43:25 It truly was like well, I mean you would hope because it's both brands.

43:28 I know, but like does taste like that.

43:30 Sometimes sometimes they like, you know,

43:31 they like over-engineer something and like it takes away the spirit of it.

43:35 Like no, brother.

43:36 This just feels like they went like they literally went Jack Coke Boom.

43:41 And I was very I was happy with it.

43:44 Yeah.

43:43 Um They have Jack and Coke Zero ones, too.

43:46 Those are the ones I get.

43:47 Whoa.

43:48 You're a savior for drinking Coke Zero.

43:50 I've just gotten into the diet soda like universe.

43:55 I I never got into Like I feel like diet Coke people are like fiends.

44:00 Like there's a cult behind diet Coke.

44:03 Yeah, there are.

44:04 It's It's wild.

44:05 They must make so much money just from diet Coke.

44:07 I mean, I imagine the fridge sigs is like a thing now.

44:10 What the Oh.

44:11 Fridge A fridge sig.

44:13 That's what they call diet Cokes.

44:14 You haven't seen it like people making like shirts that say

44:18 like pass me a fridge sig and it's like a mar

44:20 like clearly looks like a pack of cigarettes like a Marlboro

44:22 red and it's open and it's just a thing of diet Coke.

44:25 I love that.

44:25 That's so funny.

44:26 Yeah, no, people that like There's two types of people.

44:29 People that just don't drink diet Coke or people that have it with every ounce

44:34 of their being and will defend it until

44:35 THE DAY ASPARTAME'S NOT EVEN THAT BAD FOR YOU.

44:38 I mean, it isn't.

44:40 I know, but I'm saying like those are the people.

44:41 It's not like casual Coke diet Coke drinkers.

44:44 Bro, I like I guess I just it was just one

44:47 of those parts of life that you don't think about for so long.

44:50 But now that I'm like conscious and realizing

44:55 what's going on, it's kind of like incredible.

44:59 I A diet Coke is zero calories.

45:01 I am holding on to whatever of my youth I

45:04 have left by refusing to drink diet soda of any type.

45:08 What do you mean?

45:09 Because like I will convince Not will.

45:12 I fully have convinced myself that like cane sugar Yeah.

45:16 sodas like you know how they do like the Mexican Cokes.

45:19 And like I I I think a lot of soda brands are

45:21 now rolling out more like cane sugar options than high fructose corn syrup.

45:25 But like I will convince myself to the day I die like I'm

45:28 being a healthier person by having

45:30 that compared to the high fructose corn syrup.

45:32 I think that as long as you're not abusing either, you're being healthy.

45:36 No, high fructose corn syrup I like Oh,

45:38 there is high fruct- I thought if you had cane sugar then you don't.

45:41 That's what I'm saying.

45:42 A high fructose corn syrup in any capacity,

45:44 I can only speak for myself is not good for me.

45:47 Like whether it's one or whether it's five.

45:51 But I'm saying I have convinced myself that just

45:53 the exact same drink with the exact same sugar content, but just with cane sugar

45:58 Right.

45:59 is better for me despite the fact that it's 130% my daily value for sugar.

46:07 [laughter] So, like I am not there on diet soda

46:09 of any Like someone once Where were we recently

46:13 that someone had a diet orange soda and I

46:16 was like just don't have it at that point.

46:19 I mean, it probably tastes the same and it's zero calories.

46:22 It's absurd.

46:23 I am one of those people that I believe with so

46:25 much confidence I can taste the difference between diet and regular.

46:28 You probably could, but it's not worth the the diff like the difference.

46:33 difference?

46:34 Yeah, because something like orange soda, too, has like a lot of sugar.

46:37 I do look at like I know I I uh uh like I am a skeptic.

46:42 I think you know that about me.

46:44 I look at diet soda and just say like we there's something we're missing.

46:49 Like [laughter] This is too good to be true to be a real thing and for it to not

46:56 like in 10 years it forms into like

46:59 a glob monster in our stomach and eat us somehow.

47:01 You know what I mean?

47:02 Like there's something we don't get yet.

47:04 Well, that's the thing.

47:04 Like people say like the aspartame is like the bad thing,

47:07 which it it is technically like not good if you had a lot,

47:11 but the but the amount you would need to drink in a single day is like 30 cans.

47:16 Like Dr.

47:16 Mike says it all the time on his show, the dose makes the poison.

47:19 Yeah.

47:20 Not the other way.

47:21 Anything.

47:21 Like water too much would kill you, but Exactly.

47:24 I But yeah, it's it's outrageous.

47:26 I don't really like I guess just not drinking soda at all for so many years,

47:30 I don't really like crave it.

47:32 Uh but I find it fascinating.

47:34 I will tell you right now We have the mini ones of like

47:37 That's That's smart and and responsible.

47:39 ginger ale and whatever.

47:41 Yo, I'm going to tell you right now real Like I've had like you know,

47:46 like you have like uh Coca-Cola and then

47:49 you have like off-brand like real cane sugar cola.

47:55 Nothing is as good as the real stuff except for ginger ale.

48:02 [laughter] Yo, I had real like real legit ginger ale and I was

48:06 like what what have we been missing out on our whole lives?

48:09 This is so good.

48:11 What are you talking about?

48:12 so much better than like Schweppes.

48:14 What's What's real ginger ale?

48:16 Like when you look when you get ginger ale like like a Canada Dry or Schweppes,

48:21 no disrespect it's like high fructose corn syrup and you know,

48:25 like ginger extract and stuff like that.

48:27 Like when you get like legit ginger ale Where would I get that?

48:30 What is it?

48:31 it.

48:31 They sell it at the store.

48:33 ginger?

48:33 It's It's basically just like soda water a little

48:37 bit of cane sugar and like ginger juice.

48:40 Okay.

48:41 It'll blow your mind.

48:43 You'll be like, "Wow, that is like a significant difference." Yeah.

48:46 in quality.

48:47 Just better.

48:48 Yeah, I don't know.

48:49 It's It's fascinating.

48:50 Diet Snapple doesn't get it right.

48:52 That's That's the only That's the only diet product where the calories

48:56 of regular Snapple is 100% worth it cuz it tastes awful.

48:59 Diet Snapple tastes awful.

49:00 I've never had it.

49:00 I just don't understand like people are like,

49:02 "I'm going to have a diet Mountain Dew." Like you're already there.

49:06 Just What No, there's a massive

49:09 Just have But I'm saying like if you're going

49:11 to the point where like you're having Mountain Dew

49:14 the opposite than what you're saying.

49:15 Like if you're going to have soda, just have the one that has 40 g of sugar.

49:21 I'm more referencing the fact like if it's like a niche soda.

49:23 Like, "Oh, man, I really love Mr.

49:26 Pibb." Like just just have [laughter] Mr.

49:29 Pibb.

49:30 Don't have diet Mr.

49:31 Pibb.

49:31 You know what I mean?

49:32 I I feel differently.

49:34 I feel like if you can get You went to the park, go down the slide.

49:39 Yeah, but it's so different.

49:40 Is it?

49:41 Yeah.

49:42 Cuz like the the if I like the only

49:45 soda that I've consistently liked has been ginger ale.

49:49 You're not a Coca-Cola guy?

49:51 No.

49:52 I'm not.

49:53 Like Oh, no, no, no.

49:55 I like it.

49:55 Like You and your you and your cream soda or root beer.

49:59 Well, like I don't I don't I don't like drink that.

50:01 I haven't drank that since I was like nine.

50:03 But a but a diet but a diet like Coke

50:08 to me cuz I don't drink the the like the regular stuff,

50:12 it tastes it like does what it needs to do.

50:14 That's fine.

50:15 And that's good.

50:15 Like I said, you we I don't think there's any one sitting in this triangle

50:20 right here that is going to say

50:21 that you're not being a more responsible version of [laughter] a human being.

50:25 No, I just can't wrap my mind around like if you have

50:30 any insert brand name of a soda and it's whatever amount of calories,

50:36 200 to 300 with like 50 g of of sugar.

50:40 And then you can get the same thing that is very close in taste and it's zero.

50:45 What?

50:46 Yeah, but then you're going to look at it and you're going to be like, why?

50:49 Like that's me.

50:49 Like I like Look, there's an answer.

50:51 For some reason, and I know this is stupid.

50:55 aspartame.

50:54 I know no, but listen, I know this is dumb.

50:56 I know it I know it I know it.

50:59 In my head though, it's like I feel like

51:01 I'm getting more of an answer with the one

51:04 that has the sugar in it than the one that tastes the exact same and doesn't.

51:09 Does that make sense?

51:10 Like I feel like I understand that.

51:12 You're right.

51:12 What the is that over there?

51:14 But all that requires is for you to be open to being wrong about [laughter] it.

51:20 but listen, you know me.

51:21 I'm not going to do that.

51:22 About I'm going to do that about certain things in life.

51:24 Not soda.

51:27 You think I'm going to be you you want me to admit

51:29 that I'm a human and I can and that I'm wrong about soda?

51:32 I'm an idiot.

51:32 Yeah, what am I thinking?

51:33 Who do you think you're talking to here?

51:36 That's so funny.

51:38 Are you diet guy?

51:39 Uh yeah, diet Coke.

51:41 Oh yeah, you're big on diet Coke.

51:42 Diet Coke.

51:42 I mean what it's just wasted calories the other way.

51:44 Already you know if you're drinking already

51:47 getting those calories, do the diet Coke.

51:48 I just I also do I need to try a diet No, I'M NOT DOING THIS.

51:54 [laughter] WE GOT DIET COKE IN THE FRIDGE.

51:54 WAIT, HAVE YOU YOU'VE tried one before?

51:56 You've had a diet Coke.

51:57 I'm not even kidding.

51:58 I can't tell you the last time I had a diet Coke.

52:00 Bro, it's kind of incredible.

52:01 the diet Coke.

52:02 He's [laughter] going to try a diet Coke.

52:03 It's kind of insane.

52:03 I guess I'll try one now.

52:05 Yeah, it's kind of wild.

52:06 Oh, look at Oh, oh yeah, you're limping.

52:08 So big limpy.

52:10 Some big limpy.

52:12 What does that mean?

52:14 All right, before we get to Frank trying

52:15 a diet Coke for the first time in 10 years, probably more than that.

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56:09 Now, Frank, you just took a deep breath.

56:14 I'm just I I I'm not even I like I

56:17 can't tell you the last time I had a diet Coke.

56:19 What what Give a When do you think the last time you had a diet Coke was, truly?

56:24 Truly?

56:25 Like what are we saying like had?

56:27 Like ordered one and got one or bought one from the store?

56:31 Did it touch your lips?

56:32 Yeah, when was the last time you drank it?

56:35 Maybe 15 to 20 years ago.

56:38 Woah.

56:38 And when was the last time you had a Coca-Cola?

56:41 Saturday.

56:44 [laughter] Okay.

56:44 So you're you're not uh a stranger to the taste.

56:47 Yes.

56:47 I I I I've gone on record.

56:50 I'm going to be a real hero here

56:52 and say that I believe Coca-Cola is the best soda.

56:54 Okay.

56:55 You know.

56:56 But I like I'm just looking at this.

56:58 It's a DC, babe.

57:00 It was to the point that like Coca-Cola

57:02 came out with like a line of like vintage

57:06 glass bottles when I was in high school and I like bought some for my dad and I.

57:09 You love it.

57:12 Don't you?

57:12 I do.

57:13 Well, then you'll love that.

57:14 this is so I think I actually put brought it

57:16 in on that episode we did months ago, years ago.

57:19 Like bringing in old stuff.

57:21 I saved one and filled it with sunflower seeds,

57:24 put the top back on it and wrote Frankie on it cuz I was like,

57:27 this is me in a bottle.

57:30 What the hell does that mean?

57:31 Wait, you put sunflower seeds in a in a Yeah,

57:34 I drank the soda out of a Coca-Cola bottle.

57:37 Yeah.

57:37 Filled it with sunflower seeds Like a plastic bottle?

57:39 No, glass.

57:41 It was a glass bottle.

57:43 Yeah.

57:43 And then you filled that with seeds.

57:45 Yeah.

57:44 And you put the cap back on.

57:46 Yep.

57:47 And you said, this bottle is representative of me.

57:50 You got [laughter] it.

57:51 Just a simple guy.

57:52 He's just give me some seeds and some soda and I'm chilling.

57:55 Frankie.

57:55 Yep.

57:57 That sounded good.

57:58 Give me the sound.

58:00 I You're smelling it like it's wine.

58:02 I [laughter] mean aerated.

58:06 I can already I I I well, I can't say anything cuz I I know it's

58:10 a diet Coke so I can't sit here and be like, I smell a difference.

58:12 But like You gave that a big taste.

58:22 That tastes like the '90s.

58:24 It tastes like the '90s.

58:25 We always had Coca-Cola at my house in the '90s and diet Coke.

58:29 My mom was one of those people that was just like, diet Coke.

58:32 Yeah.

58:33 Yeah, dude.

58:34 Is it good?

58:35 Yeah, I mean it it's definitely diet.

58:38 You can it's like it's extreme for you?

58:41 Uh again, I'm I it could be mental cuz I know I'm

58:44 drinking it so like if you could be able to tell the

58:47 I do too, but like to be fair, I can't sit here and say with 100% certainty.

58:52 I think I could tell.

58:53 You'd be able to tell.

58:54 Cuz then when you drink a normal Coke, you go, woah, it's a lot of sugar.

58:58 And that's zero.

59:00 So imagine the guilt you have from having like Why am I pedaling?

59:04 Why [laughter] am I pedaling?

59:06 But like you're really working hard for Coca-Cola.

59:08 No, I it it's honestly like it cuz it's very recent to me

59:11 that like I just started like having like the little uh little nips.

59:15 Did No, the You need your You need your fridge dart?

59:19 My fridge dart.

59:20 No, they're like uh whatever, the the smaller cans.

59:23 And uh I'm like, how like it it's just zero calories is crazy to me.

59:30 And it's a soda.

59:31 Like I'm tasting soda in my mind.

59:33 Yeah, I mean it's just it's just a weird Another thing that makes it really cool

59:38 is that like they have their recipe like

59:40 in a basement in like a vault somewhere.

59:42 I think that's pretty cool.

59:43 Do they?

59:45 Why do you know that?

59:46 That's like the thing that people know about Coca-Cola.

59:49 They have a recipe on like papyrus and they have it in a basement?

59:52 Yeah, in a vault.

59:53 You never saw the Coke vault?

59:55 Pull up a pull up a pull up a picture of the Coke vault.

1:00:00 The Coca vault.

1:00:02 If this is a real door and not I was tricked, it's a sick vault, dude.

1:00:09 off.

1:00:09 I thought that was That's real?

1:00:12 Yeah, I trust this image.

1:00:14 Yeah, all the other [laughter] ones could be potentially artificial.

1:00:17 this one looks like there's a line and a thing and Oh, you can like walk by it.

1:00:21 Yeah.

1:00:21 Dude, like that's

1:00:22 Where is this?

1:00:23 I think in Georgia.

1:00:24 Yeah.

1:00:25 Atlanta.

1:00:27 Wow.

1:00:26 Like it's like a thing.

1:00:28 It's a sick keyhole.

1:00:30 Yeah.

1:00:31 Look, man.

1:00:32 I think that makes it also way cooler.

1:00:35 Like no one's like vying for I guess technically it is but Diet Coke

1:00:38 also but like it's like a legit secret and it's like you'll never know.

1:00:43 It's like where Mr.

1:00:44 Krabs has the Krabby Patty formula.

1:00:48 Sorry.

1:00:51 [laughter]

1:00:50 I mean we are just on the cusp of understanding SpongeBob references cuz Oh,

1:00:55 you guys don't No, we do.

1:00:57 I mean it debuted when we were like Of course I know SpongeBob.

1:00:59 Oh, really?

1:01:00 when we were like eight.

1:01:01 I loved SpongeBob.

1:01:03 Big SpongeBob even know SpongeBob.

1:01:05 Yeah, I know SpongeBob.

1:01:06 You know the new You know where SpongeBob is like a full idiot.

1:01:09 We remember when he was annoying.

1:01:12 Huh.

1:01:14 Hmm.

1:01:15 You know the episode where it's like Yeah.

1:01:17 They keep talking like that.

1:01:18 Oh, I love that.

1:01:19 That's the old animation and it's not not just a boulder, it's a rock.

1:01:21 Yeah, how about he meow meow meow?

1:01:24 Who's that?

1:01:25 Who's that, DoodleBob.

1:01:28 DoodleBob.

1:01:28 You remember DoodleBob, right?

1:01:29 Yes, it's a very easy one.

1:01:30 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1:01:33 What about the Krusty Krab pizza?

1:01:35 Is the pizza for you and me.

1:01:39 he knows that one.

1:01:39 All right, good.

1:01:40 same as the boulder and the rock.

1:01:41 Sorry to bring up SpongeBob, everybody.

1:01:43 God.

1:01:44 Why are you sorry?

1:01:44 I don't know.

1:01:45 Is there like a point of Is this like a hot button subject here?

1:01:49 No.

1:01:49 I think SpongeBob is still a universally loved piece of intellectual property.

1:01:53 I don't think there's a lot there for people to get upset about.

1:01:56 You ever see the dude who does SpongeBob's voice?

1:02:00 Tom Kenny?

1:02:01 Whenever I see him do it, I'm like I don't know if I like that.

1:02:06 He I don't like seeing

1:02:09 If you would have asked me to draw the guy that does SpongeBob's voice,

1:02:12 that's who I would draw.

1:02:14 I would draw Ariana Grande's boyfriend for sure.

1:02:16 Yeah.

1:02:17 Oh, that video that went viral of him singing at the like

1:02:20 cuz that's how a lot of people don't know that.

1:02:22 That's where Ethan Slater got big is he did SpongeBob on Broadway

1:02:25 which is a like a sentence that's never been uttered before.

1:02:28 I got big on Broadway cuz of SpongeBob.

1:02:31 And uh he looks like yeah, that's SpongeBob.

1:02:35 He's a He's SpongeBobby.

1:02:36 He's a seasoned SpongeBob.

1:02:38 Yeah.

1:02:38 Like he's a well Do you Have you ever seen the guy that does Mr.

1:02:40 Krabs?

1:02:42 You know you know the actor.

1:02:43 You've seen him in other things but like Pull him up.

1:02:45 Clancy Krabs.

1:02:46 Clancy Brown is his name.

1:02:47 Clancy Brown?

1:02:50 You could just write Clancy Brown.

1:02:54 Yeah, you know this guy.

1:02:55 He does a lot of voice acting.

1:02:56 Yeah, so does Tom Kenny.

1:02:58 Wait.

1:02:59 That's him?

1:02:59 The dude from Shawshank?

1:03:01 Yeah.

1:03:02 Oh,

1:03:04 Yeah.

1:03:04 That's Mr.

1:03:05 Krabs?

1:03:05 The guy from Shawshank?

1:03:06 Yeah, dude.

1:03:08 Just want a bucket of suds for me and my fellas.

1:03:11 Yeah, he's done a lot.

1:03:13 Wow.

1:03:14 Dude, being a voice actor is probably a pretty cool gig.

1:03:16 I would do it.

1:03:17 I think it's cool.

1:03:17 I would love to be a voice actor.

1:03:19 can Can you do voices?

1:03:21 I'll figure it out.

1:03:22 Well, no, that's not That's how the job being works.

1:03:24 They're not going to hire you.

1:03:25 You can figure out anything.

1:03:27 All right.

1:03:29 Do like Krabs.

1:03:31 Yeah, do Mr.

1:03:31 Krabs.

1:03:33 But I'm not Mr.

1:03:33 Krabs.

1:03:34 Do a crab that's greedy and loves money.

1:03:40 I don't know.

1:03:40 Yeah, see you're fired, actually.

1:03:43 You'll never get it.

1:03:44 I feel like we would be good voice actors.

1:03:48 Me?

1:03:48 That's it.

1:03:50 I don't know.

1:03:51 Maybe, I don't know.

1:03:52 I could probably I could I could do

1:03:53 my voice but I don't think it's interesting enough.

1:03:55 I think you could do like I don't have like an interesting voice.

1:03:58 But like I think the part of voice acting that you

1:04:00 would be good at is like you're not just doing your voice.

1:04:02 You're like turning it up for a little bit.

1:04:04 You know what I mean?

1:04:04 Like Yeah.

1:04:07 Yep.

1:04:08 You're Joe.

1:04:10 Hello.

1:04:10 But you're a skater that really loves to hang out and eat tacos.

1:04:17 [laughter] I'm a skater?

1:04:19 Yeah.

1:04:21 Like I just like like skating?

1:04:23 Yeah.

1:04:24 Okay.

1:04:24 That was not bad, see?

1:04:25 I wasn't doing a voice.

1:04:26 Exactly.

1:04:28 You were so enveloped in the character.

1:04:30 Is that the word?

1:04:31 Enveloped?

1:04:32 Enveloped?

1:04:32 Yeah.

1:04:33 Is that a word?

1:04:35 Yeah.

1:04:34 Like an envelope.

1:04:35 That's my Yeah.

1:04:37 Yeah, how would that That's okay.

1:04:39 When you're like fully in something, you're enveloped in it.

1:04:42 I had no idea it enveloped by it, maybe.

1:04:45 Thanks for that.

1:04:45 the actual syntax.

1:04:46 Thanks for that.

1:04:47 You're welcome.

1:04:47 That's the only one you get after you the way you spoke to me earlier.

1:04:50 I didn't say nothing.

1:04:50 After you You calm down.

1:04:52 [laughter] Whoa, what happened?

1:04:54 No, so you're you're like a like you're a you're a skater that just loves tacos.

1:04:58 Like a Californian skater, dude?

1:05:00 Yeah, but see like there you go, dude.

1:05:03 Like you just got to be yourself and like draw it up a little bit.

1:05:07 You know?

1:05:08 You would have been really good in like those '90s like like Rocket Power.

1:05:12 That's what I was thinking, honestly.

1:05:13 Yeah.

1:05:13 I think we would have been good in Rocket Power.

1:05:16 Real quick, Rocket Power, right?

1:05:17 You watched that and obviously you're like which one of these guys am I?

1:05:21 Which one did you think you were?

1:05:22 I wish that

1:05:22 one did you want to be?

1:05:24 I wanted to Who didn't want to be Otto?

1:05:26 Everyone wanted to be Otto.

1:05:28 I didn't.

1:05:29 Who did you want to be?

1:05:30 The other one.

1:05:32 What's his name?

1:05:33 Squid?

1:05:34 No.

1:05:35 Who is he?

1:05:36 Squid.

1:05:36 Who's I don't WHO DO YOU THINK I WANTED TO BE?

1:05:38 WELL, NO, THAT'S WHY I'M CONFUSED.

1:05:40 Who's the other guy with that with the backwards hat?

1:05:42 Otto Twister?

1:05:44 Is it Twister?

1:05:46 Is his name Twister?

1:05:47 Do we know?

1:05:47 Otto Twister or Squid?

1:05:50 What's the girl's name?

1:05:53 Damn, I don't remember their I guess I I don't

1:05:55 remember Rocket Power as well as I thought I did.

1:05:57 And earned your goddamn paycheck.

1:05:59 Yeah, Otto Regina.

1:06:01 You wanted to be Oh, no.

1:06:03 Maurice.

1:06:05 I had NO IDEA YOU WANTED TO BE MAURICE?

1:06:07 OFF THE NAME ALONE, that sucks.

1:06:09 Click on Maurice.

1:06:10 This guy had a nickname.

1:06:13 He needed a nickname.

1:06:15 He's Twister, bro.

1:06:16 Twister.

1:06:17 Thank you.

1:06:18 Damn, I thought it was just like I want to be Reese.

1:06:20 No, no, no.

1:06:21 Twister.

1:06:21 I heard Maurice, I'm like I'm out, dude.

1:06:23 No, no.

1:06:23 I wanted to be him though cuz I was like yeah,

1:06:25 I'm probably not Otto but at least I could be Twister.

1:06:28 I Of course wanted to be Otto.

1:06:29 Dude, look at Otto.

1:06:30 Look how rad he looks.

1:06:32 Like those glasses, are you kidding me?

1:06:33 It's kind of crazy.

1:06:34 I mean I don't I don't know where the mustache thing came in.

1:06:37 That's that's a later version.

1:06:38 That's honestly a weird one.

1:06:39 Twister was a sick name.

1:06:41 I will the backwards Kangol is kind of bananas to be honest with you.

1:06:44 Yeah, you You know what though?

1:06:46 I'm confident you could pull it off.

1:06:48 I don't know.

1:06:49 You could have like the little hair flip in the front like that.

1:06:51 Like I I think you'd do all right.

1:06:54 Did you watch this show?

1:06:55 I did not I I I was It was on during my time.

1:06:59 I just I never watched this one though.

1:07:00 Oh, yeah.

1:07:01 I loved I loved this show.

1:07:05 I think it was Kids Codename: Kids Next Door.

1:07:08 Oh, yeah.

1:07:08 What is that?

1:07:08 It was like kids that are like spies and they're like this is number one,

1:07:12 number three, number two, number five.

1:07:15 They're like spies.

1:07:16 They're home They're like spy bases in a tree.

1:07:19 Yeah.

1:07:19 They would call themselves each other like number

1:07:21 one and he was like a bald kid.

1:07:22 Also, yeah, why were there bald kids?

1:07:25 There's always a bald kid.

1:07:26 Yeah, I guess so.

1:07:26 Wait, there was bald children in the show you're talking about?

1:07:28 Yeah, number one was bald.

1:07:29 Pull it up.

1:07:30 Number one was bald and also Cal Caillou Cal Caillou?

1:07:33 Caillou.

1:07:34 Caillou?

1:07:35 Can't believe I knew that and you didn't.

1:07:38 Caillou?

1:07:38 Caillou.

1:07:39 I've never heard of this show.

1:07:40 Oh, I've seen a picture of this.

1:07:42 Yeah, you've definitely seen it.

1:07:43 Oh, I've seen that.

1:07:44 That reminds me of Danny.

1:07:45 THE [laughter] IS THIS GUY MY DANNY?

1:07:49 YEAH, you're Danny.

1:07:49 Yeah, that's definitely my Danny.

1:07:50 I was number two.

1:07:51 That's number two.

1:07:52 Oh, yeah, I can tell by his hat.

1:07:54 Yeah.

1:07:54 Dude, They lean into They lean into the numbers pretty hard and the kid thing.

1:07:58 Going back to Rocket Power.

1:08:01 Hindsight, I think if we watch it,

1:08:02 it wouldn't be very well representative of like the guy that plays Tito,

1:08:06 how he's just like a caricature for like the like Hawaiian man.

1:08:11 Yeah, I mean You know, and it's like All right.

1:08:13 What am I going to do?

1:08:14 know if we could repeat some of those sayings.

1:08:17 Frankie, you want to do a voice acting thing for me?

1:08:19 Yeah, I I Sure, yeah.

1:08:21 You have something?

1:08:22 I have a villain released after a thousand

1:08:25 years from a crypt who sees an old friend.

1:08:28 Hmm.

1:08:28 Give me more here.

1:08:29 Do villains have friends?

1:08:30 Let's get that.

1:08:31 Other villains, dude.

1:08:32 That's fair.

1:08:33 But do they even like each other or is they

1:08:35 could use I mean even I'm not going to say it.

1:08:37 Yeah, they have friends.

1:08:38 Or you know, like a a a companion that has released this villain from the crypt.

1:08:44 Ah.

1:08:44 Ah, yes.

1:08:45 So my the other one I've I've released you.

1:08:47 Yes.

1:08:48 How many years?

1:08:49 Thousand years.

1:08:49 Thousand years, you're probably like sore a little bit.

1:08:52 like what kind of villain am I?

1:08:54 Am I like a real like cheeky son of a or am I just like

1:08:58 evil I think but I think I'm like funny and witty

1:09:00 and I try to be like hahaha like Hades from Hercules.

1:09:03 No, no, no.

1:09:03 You're a evil

1:09:04 Yeah.

1:09:04 Oh, I'm a real scumbag.

1:09:06 Yeah, yeah.

1:09:07 Like a real douche.

1:09:07 No, if there's a reason you were locked up for a thousand years.

1:09:10 It was I Now, within this prison of mine

1:09:13 Yes, sir.

1:09:14 do I have access to speak or is it like I'm like in carbonite like I can't

1:09:18 No, this is your first time.

1:09:19 This is like genie coming out of the lamp like 10,000 years.

1:09:23 Such a crick in the neck.

1:09:24 Yeah.

1:09:25 So that's you but evil.

1:09:27 Ah, okay.

1:09:28 All right, that's that's tough.

1:09:29 I think I can do it.

1:09:30 I would say even you are stone.

1:09:32 And you're kind of like breaking out you're coming out of it.

1:09:35 All right.

1:09:35 You're coming back.

1:09:36 Okay.

1:09:37 All right, so you give him you have to release me,

1:09:39 but you have to say something to release me.

1:09:42 I can do a uh um What's that called?

1:09:45 Incantation?

1:09:46 Yeah.

1:09:47 Yeah.

1:09:47 And then you start breaking out of your shell.

1:09:49 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1:09:49 All right, go ahead and follow me here.

1:09:51 I don't know how to do this without sounding offensive.

1:09:55 [laughter] Drink a diet coke.

1:09:56 What what is the Evil Dead one?

1:09:57 Nosferatu Nicto?

1:09:59 Oh, I I don't know the Evil Dead one off the top of my head.

1:10:02 Isn't that like Kunda and I'm going to stop there just in case.

1:10:06 Something like that.

1:10:07 Yeah.

1:10:07 That was a bad one.

1:10:08 Let's pretend I did it already.

1:10:10 Yeah, okay.

1:10:10 All right, all right.

1:10:11 And you JUST BREAK THIS.

1:10:13 OH, YEAH.

1:10:18 [laughter]

1:10:21 OKAY.

1:10:21 OKAY.

1:10:22 OH, I'm back.

1:10:24 Yeah.

1:10:27 Why am I evil?

1:10:28 Who am I Who am I evil against?

1:10:29 Let's make that clear.

1:10:30 those damn kids.

1:10:33 Soon as I get my hands on those damn kids.

1:10:38 [laughter]

1:10:40 Please don't take that out OF CONTEXT.

1:10:43 ARE [laughter] [laughter] OH MY GOD, THE CAMERA WILL BE READY SECOND.

1:10:57 [laughter]

1:10:56 OKAY.

1:10:57 All right.

1:10:58 I was thinking of like Scooby-Doo.

1:10:59 That's why I said that.

1:11:02 Please don't take that out of context.

1:11:03 [laughter] Oh, yeah.

1:11:04 Yeah.

1:11:05 Oh.

1:11:07 [groaning] Oh, you're really having [laughter] a good time.

1:11:09 I just I was just in stone.

1:11:10 I feel like you're you're twitching up the cowboy a little bit.

1:11:13 Can we get a little more skeleton in there?

1:11:16 Yeah.

1:11:17 Well, I finally got out.

1:11:20 No?

1:11:20 [laughter] I mean, I appreciate your commitment.

1:11:22 I'm trying, man.

1:11:23 No, man, you are.

1:11:24 I'm thinking of like Skeletor from like the old He-Man ones,

1:11:26 you know, where he's just like you know, something like that.

1:11:31 I don't know.

1:11:31 We should do a whole episode with this.

1:11:32 me this.

1:11:34 What does that mean?

1:11:35 All right, you're Oh, wait, I don't Okay.

1:11:38 You're an old evil genie.

1:11:42 Genie?

1:11:44 Yeah.

1:11:44 But like you're kind of like you think you're like you're funny,

1:11:47 but you want to take people's souls.

1:11:50 Can genies do that?

1:11:53 And I let you out.

1:11:55 And I let you out, but I think you're going to do good.

1:11:57 Right.

1:11:58 But like you're like I you don't know who

1:12:00 I you you don't even know who you let out.

1:12:02 you?

1:12:02 I'm just me.

1:12:04 A dude?

1:12:05 Yeah.

1:12:05 But you're just like

1:12:06 my lamp.

1:12:07 your lamp and I think like oh man, great.

1:12:09 Now I got a genie lamp.

1:12:10 Yeah.

1:12:11 But like you're an actual bad person.

1:12:15 Genie.

1:12:16 An old guy.

1:12:17 You I mean, you are thousands of years old, but you were gena gena-sized.

1:12:22 Genified?

1:12:23 What does that mean?

1:12:23 Turned into a genie.

1:12:25 When you were 34.

1:12:29 [laughter] So, I'm just me?

1:12:31 I mean, that's for you to decide, my friend.

1:12:34 So, what am I doing again?

1:12:35 I rub the lamp and you're coming out and it's

1:12:37 like I think I'm like oh my god, yes, I have a genie, but you are like little

1:12:40 do you know who you just let out, big boy.

1:12:44 You don't need to say that.

1:12:46 [laughter]

1:12:46 Big boy.

1:12:47 Yeah.

1:12:47 All right.

1:12:47 no idea who you just let out, big boy.

1:12:51 What wish do you want?

1:12:55 [laughter] Let me know what wish you want, big boy.

1:12:57 He comes out he's just hitting on you.

1:12:59 Ooh.

1:13:03 [laughter] Come here.

1:13:02 Who rubbed my lamp?

1:13:05 Who needs a wish?

1:13:07 A shirtless wish.

1:13:08 You honestly sound like Will Ferrell right now.

1:13:11 Oh, there was some of that.

1:13:13 a little Will Ferrell in there, you know?

1:13:15 That would be a funny movie.

1:13:16 Like did you ever see Do you remember the sketch

1:13:18 he did with Garth Brooks in the 90s where

1:13:20 he plays the devil and it's like the devil's

1:13:23 going to play this guitar, but he sucks at it.

1:13:25 Yeah, yeah.

1:13:25 You remember that.

1:13:26 [laughter] He's like ooh, I'm going to shred this and he's like Hold on.

1:13:30 Hold on now.

1:13:32 I'm getting it.

1:13:33 Uh uh uh oh.

1:13:33 Can you imagine?

1:13:34 Oh dude, imagine rubbing a lamp and a genie popped out.

1:13:37 Yo, after I saw Aladdin when I was a child,

1:13:39 I was rubbing everything in my house.

1:13:41 Yeah, I mean, I I bet you were.

1:13:44 Yeah.

1:13:44 Uh that's fair, too.

1:13:46 Yeah.

1:13:46 I was.

1:13:46 [laughter] Myself.

1:13:47 Jesus.

1:13:48 I used to like I'll skip that one.

1:13:51 Yeah, you [laughter] I don't got to write that one down.

1:13:53 Too close.

1:13:54 Yeah.

1:13:54 Uh I used to think the same thing.

1:13:56 Like if I were to like just like Remember how in like Dexter's Laboratory,

1:14:00 he like lifted up like a family portrait and there was like a button.

1:14:03 I love that.

1:14:04 I would like search behind like things hung up in my house.

1:14:06 Be like maybe there's that button to like a secret lab.

1:14:09 I think [snorts] that when people have like that in their house,

1:14:15 I think it's so cool.

1:14:17 Do you think when you have a giant house cuz we know [laughter]

1:14:23 you'll have like Cuz people have installed like modern day like bookcases where

1:14:29 like they move a book and it opens to like the the man cave.

1:14:33 Yeah, yeah.

1:14:34 Which we can agree I hate the man cave.

1:14:36 Man caves are Yeah.

1:14:37 so stupid.

1:14:38 I just have a house and I I feel like This this is the man cave.

1:14:44 Okay.

1:14:44 This is the man cave.

1:14:46 What gave it away?

1:14:47 The sign that says parking for Yankee fans only.

1:14:49 I hate that so much.

1:14:51 Oh, the bathroom, it's a urinal and guess what's in there?

1:14:54 A David Ortiz's face.

1:14:56 Yeah, like I don't need all the signage.

1:14:58 I don't want this.

1:15:00 Yeah.

1:15:00 Or like even worse she go not even worse,

1:15:01 but like in addition it people's like man caves and there's 80 TVs.

1:15:06 Who needs this?

1:15:07 Yeah.

1:15:08 And it's like that's that's my chair.

1:15:10 That's the holy [laughter] that's the holy throne.

1:15:13 Here's the rules.

1:15:14 Rule number one, NO BITCHING.

1:15:18 WHY?

1:15:20 [laughter] RULE number one I'm always right.

1:15:22 Rule number two, the Patriots.

1:15:26 [laughter] It's like all right, we get And rule number one.

1:15:28 Yeah, we you've been to Hobby Lobby.

1:15:30 We understand.

1:15:31 Yeah, it's rough.

1:15:32 Um what was the question?

1:15:34 The like Oh, will I do the bookcase?

1:15:36 I could see that being like cool for like a reading nook.

1:15:38 I would love that.

1:15:39 I mean, yeah, I don't know that unfortunately it would make a lot of sense.

1:15:43 But I think that it is cool.

1:15:45 Or like a button and a little man.

1:15:47 You could have a button on like a bust

1:15:48 of William Shakespeare and you like push his head back,

1:15:51 press it and a door opens.

1:15:52 I could see you having like a room that has like floor-to-ceiling bookshelves.

1:15:57 Ooh, I really like that.

1:15:59 I like a uh a book like a library ladder.

1:16:02 Oh.

1:16:02 You want a library ladder?

1:16:03 When I can just like kick off and be like what do you need?

1:16:06 Yeah, but here's the thing, they used to be filled with cool looking books.

1:16:09 Now the spines of all the books are like white and colorful.

1:16:13 Like back then it was like old bound leather.

1:16:15 Yeah, like spell books.

1:16:17 Yes.

1:16:18 Do you know what I mean?

1:16:19 I want to open a book and cough.

1:16:21 Bro.

1:16:21 Yeah, I want it to be dusty and have like asbestos in the pages.

1:16:24 I could see you having something like I am going to go out on a limb.

1:16:28 I think you should and if you don't, you kind of suck.

1:16:31 I'm dropping the ball.

1:16:31 I should just buy encyclopedias.

1:16:33 I don't even know what they do anymore.

1:16:34 Haven't opened one since third grade.

1:16:36 Uh literally like an absolutely defunct

1:16:40 form of technology because of the internet.

1:16:42 Also, an almanac?

1:16:43 Forgot what that is.

1:16:45 I think it's just like the world.

1:16:46 Like pictures of maps.

1:16:48 Yeah, like what is an almanac?

1:16:50 It's like something with agriculture.

1:16:51 I feel like that word is right.

1:16:52 No, it's stupid.

1:16:53 It's just like oh, here here's a map of America.

1:16:56 Also, here's a map of the eastern part of America.

1:16:59 And also, here's a map of the northeast.

1:17:01 And it's like I don't need a whole book for maps.

1:17:03 Yeah.

1:17:04 It's stupid.

1:17:05 Although when I was in London, there was a store we walked into and they

1:17:08 had a bunch of old maps from like old, bro.

1:17:11 I'm going to do one here.

1:17:12 of cool.

1:17:12 Books after 1999 suck.

1:17:16 wow.

1:17:16 So trash.

1:17:17 I need an old book that smells like and probably

1:17:19 has like some blood on a page or something.

1:17:21 And I'm going to go further.

1:17:24 Like not What are they called?

1:17:26 Soft cover books?

1:17:27 Yeah, paperbacks.

1:17:29 Paperback books are stupid.

1:17:33 Oh, I like paperbacks.

1:17:34 Nope.

1:17:35 You like hard covers?

1:17:36 Hard covers are way better, dude.

1:17:37 No, I'm reading it.

1:17:39 I want to put this thing down and it makes a thunk.

1:17:43 Yeah.

1:17:44 Like paperback is just like like we got books around here somewhere.

1:17:50 Right there.

1:17:51 Oh, yeah, perfect.

1:17:53 Oh, you got two examples.

1:17:55 yeah.

1:17:55 Look at that.

1:17:58 So, this is Greg's book.

1:17:59 No disrespect to Greg, but it's a paperback, so it's Right.

1:18:03 It's it's a Greg book.

1:18:04 Yeah, careful.

1:18:04 HE'LL TEXT YOU.

1:18:08 [laughter]

1:18:08 OH, WOW, THERE'S A THERE'S A COP there's a quote from you on the back of this.

1:18:11 Yeah, you don't know the story behind that?

1:18:13 No.

1:18:14 Bro, me and Greg were like friends, but not really yet.

1:18:17 And then he asked me to be a part of his book because I had

1:18:19 a YouTube channel that was popular at the time and he was trying to use me.

1:18:23 Classic.

1:18:24 No, that's what that's the joke that I make.

1:18:26 But like he he had approached me and was like hey, I'm writing a book.

1:18:28 I would love for you to to like, you know, do this thing and I wrote something.

1:18:31 What does it say?

1:18:33 I loved every second of it.

1:18:35 I wrote the actual quote that I wrote was I

1:18:37 loved every second of it and I don't even read books.

1:18:40 And then the person was like, all right, we're we're shortening this.

1:18:43 Yeah, I mean, jokes aside, it's wildly impressive that he wrote a book.

1:18:47 Yeah, published book.

1:18:49 I've heard nothing but good things about it.

1:18:50 I've not read it.

1:18:51 However listen to this.

1:18:53 All right, and then this is a book.

1:18:55 This is not a t-shirt.

1:18:56 This sucks.

1:18:57 I don't even know I don't even know what that is.

1:18:59 I don't even know what it is.

1:18:59 I no disrespect to Gary V, Jessica Alba and Tony Hawk,

1:19:04 but They're on the back of that?

1:19:06 That's who Yeah, they wrote something.

1:19:08 Listen, you ready?

1:19:09 Just listen.

1:19:11 Okay?

1:19:13 Actually, I'll give it a more fair shake.

1:19:15 I'll drop them both like this, one like this.

1:19:17 Okay?

1:19:18 Come on, dude.

1:19:20 You like a big I just want like to like Yeah.

1:19:25 That's like I'm smacking my ass with a roll of newspaper.

1:19:30 And when would that be appropriate?

1:19:34 [laughter]

1:19:33 Well, like I want to put A BOOK BIG A BOOK BIG A BIG BOOK DOWN AND like Yeah,

1:19:42 you know what I mean?

1:19:45 Yeah.

1:19:44 I like old pages.

1:19:46 You Do you remember when There was a video that went around of like

1:19:49 like Joe Biden was getting sworn in with a book that looked insane.

1:19:55 It had a lock on it.

1:19:56 When books have locks on them, I like that.

1:19:59 Name two incredible movie books.

1:20:05 [laughter] Well, something from Harry Potter.

1:20:06 I just can't remember like the name of the books.

1:20:08 I wasn't going to think of that one.

1:20:09 I was going to go with the spell book from Hocus Pocus.

1:20:13 Yeah, that's a good one.

1:20:15 That's a good one or the book from The Mummy.

1:20:19 I don't remember The Mummy.

1:20:20 You don't remember Dude, what a book.

1:20:23 It has like a a lock on the front

1:20:25 that like it like opens like it like scarabs like that.

1:20:28 And they put it and they turn it and it's it's good, dude.

1:20:33 The Mummy book.

1:20:34 Oh, yeah, there it is.

1:20:35 Wow.

1:20:35 It worked.

1:20:36 I think Is it a real book?

1:20:38 That thing?

1:20:38 Dude.

1:20:40 That looks a little too mechanical.

1:20:42 I know that it's it.

1:20:43 This is it though.

1:20:44 [laughter] Yeah.

1:20:44 It's the death book in the Oh, spoiler, but death book and the life book.

1:20:48 Nice.

1:20:49 Spoiler?

1:20:49 The movie was from like 1999.

1:20:51 It it's great great great great job there with the year.

1:20:55 It was right?

1:20:56 1999.

1:20:57 I'm on it.

1:20:57 Yeah.

1:20:58 Good movie, by the way.

1:20:59 What about the Necronomicon?

1:21:01 Necronomicon.

1:21:02 Whatever.

1:21:02 Yeah, that one's just a scary looking book.

1:21:04 What's a necro It's from the Evil Dead series.

1:21:06 It's like it's bound in human Oh, well,

1:21:09 those are real versions of it, which is kind of creepy.

1:21:12 Why?

1:21:13 Uh it's bound with human flesh and all the pages are written in blood.

1:21:17 Ew.

1:21:18 Yeah, I mean, it's from a movie.

1:21:19 It's not Like a book made out of flesh is probably disgusting.

1:21:24 Yeah, let's not let's not look at the images just in case.

1:21:26 I'm good.

1:21:26 Just in case something pops out.

1:21:28 So, necro What was it?

1:21:30 Necronomicon.

1:21:31 Necronomicon?

1:21:32 Yeah, it's like necromancer, but a book.

1:21:34 What's What's that?

1:21:35 A necromancer is like someone that does like evil dead like magic.

1:21:40 Uh raises the dead.

1:21:41 Yeah.

1:21:42 I'm only familiar with necrophilia.

1:21:43 Not that I'm familiar with [laughter] I'm familiar with the term.

1:21:47 That one I'll That one I'll get.

1:21:48 Yeah.

1:21:49 Necro Yeah.

1:21:50 Necro Necro is like the prefix for like having to do with the dead, I believe.

1:21:55 And then philia is obviously the Greek What's What's its prefix in Sussex?

1:22:01 Post fix.

1:22:03 For like love.

1:22:04 Right.

1:22:05 You know, that's why it's called Philadelphia.

1:22:07 Philia.

1:22:09 Right.

1:22:10 It's the city of brotherly love.

1:22:12 It's ironic cuz it's I hate it.

1:22:14 Oh, yeah, that place sucks.

1:22:17 [laughter] I hate their sports teams.

1:22:18 Yeah.

1:22:19 Um well, maybe we can end on necrophilia.

1:22:23 Nope.

1:22:23 Shouldn't we?

1:22:24 We We started with swastika, ended on necrophilia.

1:22:29 [laughter] Oh, yeah.

1:22:29 What an episode.

1:22:30 Book ends of this episode are very interesting.

1:22:33 Yeah, what are we going to name this one?

1:22:34 Oh, that's a great question.

1:22:35 I have no idea.

1:22:37 Um that's a problem for another time.

1:22:39 Frank, where can they find you?

1:22:41 The Frank Alvarez all over and Patreon.

1:22:44 patreon.com/thebasementyard and The Basement Yard all over social media.

1:22:47 And?

1:22:48 Nope, he doesn't have one today.

1:22:50 Nope.

1:22:52 [laughter] You can find me at the finish line of the half

1:22:54 marathon and you guys can go follow me at Joe Santagato.

1:22:57 Go follow the show at The Basement Yard on TikTok and Instagram and that is all.

1:23:00 See you next time.