Actually the Craziest Movie Ever Made
Kurtis Conner
0:00 Folks, 6 years ago, I made a video about a movie titled Fateful Findings,
0:06 an independent film about a man who hates laptops and also
0:12 uses his supernatural abilities to take down the big evil corporations.
0:17 Later that year, I also made a video about a movie called Twisted Pair,
0:22 a film about two identical twin
0:24 brothers who become hybrid artificial intelligence entities
0:28 with one of the twins using their powers for good and the other for evil.
0:32 Both of these films were written, directed, edited,
0:35 and also starred a man named Neil Breen.
0:38 For those of you who are unfamiliar, since 2005,
0:41 Neil Breen has been creating cinematic masterpieces for all of us to enjoy.
0:47 I can't believe you committed suicide.
0:49 Each movie of his usually stars him as the superpowered outcast who
0:53 takes down the big evil corporation and gets the girl in the end.
0:57 But each one has its own unique spin.
0:59 And over the years, Neil Breen has amassed a devoted cult following of people
1:04 who are just champing at the bit for the next Neil Breen project.
1:09 Neil Breen truly is the physical embodiment of independent filmm.
1:14 You can have your opinions about Neil Breen's films, but at the end of the day,
1:18 you have to admire the fact that every time he makes a movie,
1:21 he makes the exact film that he wanted to make.
1:25 And for that reason, I've been a fan of Neil Breen for years now,
1:28 which is why I was so excited when he announced back
1:31 in 2021 that he was beginning production on his newest film.
1:35 And in this announcement, he said he was looking for possible investors.
1:39 And when I saw this announcement, I knew I needed to be a part of this.
1:43 Think of how amazing that would be.
1:45 My name in lights.
1:47 And by lights, I mean the the credits of a Neil Breen film.
1:50 So, I shot my shot.
1:51 I sent Mr.
1:52 Breen a DM on Twitter that said, "Hey, Neil,
1:55 are you still looking for investors for your next film?" And candidly,
1:58 I've been trying to get a hold of Neil Breen for years
2:02 to come on my podcast and just talk about his creative process.
2:06 But that man is impossible to get a hold of.
2:08 So when I sent this DM, I assumed he would never respond.
2:11 But 5 hours later, I get a response from Neil Breen and he said,
2:16 "Yes, what amount were you considering investing?
2:19 Then we can discuss details." And I'm going to be honest,
2:22 I didn't really have an exact number in mind
2:24 because it's usually the job of the person
2:26 who's producing the film to tell the possible
2:28 investors how much money they need, right?
2:30 Like you know on Shark Tank and people walk in and they're like, "Hey sharks,
2:34 I am seeking this much money and for that you get this much percentage
2:38 and then they negotiate from there." Neil had
2:40 a different plan which I have to admire.
2:42 He basically did the equivalent of someone
2:43 walking into the Shark Tank and being like,
2:45 "All right, what do you guys want to give me?" So,
2:47 needing more information, I said,
2:49 "Do you have an investment package you can send
2:51 over that includes the different options?" Seemed fair, right?
2:54 But to that, he said, "We need to pre-qualify you first.
2:58 What films have you invested in?
2:59 Did you receive co-producer or producer credit?
3:02 I'm new to film investing, so this would be my first venture.
3:05 I've invested in other businesses and mediums,
3:07 but this would be my first film investment." No response.
3:10 At this point, I'm panicking, right?
3:12 Did I blow it?
3:13 Did I say something wrong?
3:14 Should I have lied?
3:15 So, in an act of desperation,
3:17 I follow up the next day with a, you know, a harmless,
3:20 "Let me know." And to that, he said,
3:23 "You never stated the amount of your potential investment," which was true,
3:26 but like I said before,
3:28 I was waiting for something he could send me that would like
3:30 outline the budget and like how much he needed and like what,
3:34 you know, just like something for me to like look over and analyze, right?
3:37 So, in response, I just said, "If you can send me an investment package,
3:40 I can provide an accurate number for you." And to that he said, "No thanks.
3:45 We prefer to work with film investors who have experience." I was devastated.
3:51 I finally had the opportunity to be a part of something amazing.
3:55 And I blew it.
3:56 I let it slip through my fingers.
3:57 All because I didn't have prior film investing experience.
4:00 And it's like, how am I supposed to get
4:02 experience if every opportunity requires prior experience, right?
4:06 Like that's a catch 22.
4:07 Could you imagine if the job market was like that?
4:09 That'd be a nightmare.
4:10 Sadly, that would be the final message Neil ever sent me.
4:13 I just responded and I wished him luck on his next project.
4:17 And and that was that.
4:18 And for years, in the back of my mind,
4:21 I just kept thinking, I kept imagining what could have Breen.
4:23 Fast forward a little bit, 2 years later,
4:26 2023, Neil Breen announces his newest movie,
4:29 Cade the Tortured Crossing, a direct sequel to Twisted Pair.
4:34 Now, don't worry if you haven't seen Twisted Pair,
4:36 but before watching this video,
4:37 this new movie hardly has anything to do with it if I'm being honest.
4:40 All you need to know about Twisted Pair, two twin brothers named Cade and Kale.
4:44 They're both superpowered cyborgs.
4:46 Cade is a good one.
4:47 Kale is the evil one.
4:48 But in a series of tweets announcing
4:51 the cities where this new film would be screening,
4:53 I saw Hamilton, Ontario, Canada, my hometown.
4:57 He was taunting me.
4:59 He was taunting me, okay?
5:00 He knew.
5:01 But I put my sadness aside and as soon as those tickets became available,
5:04 I purchased them and I drove my ass out to Hamilton and I watched Cade
5:09 the Tortured Crossing in a packed theater
5:11 at Playhouse Cinema in downtown Hamilton, Ontario, Canada.
5:15 And sorry to spoil it, but guys, it was his best work yet.
5:20 It was amazing.
5:21 Okay, I left that theater a Changed Man because I I pooped my pants.
5:24 It was so good.
5:25 I I changed my diapers.
5:26 I was a changed man.
5:27 As soon as I saw this movie, I knew I had to make a video about it.
5:31 So, when Kade the Tortured Crossing was later released on DVD,
5:34 I bought it immediately.
5:36 Yeah, that's the second time I bought this movie.
5:38 And I purchased that DVD in October of last year, and I have yet to receive it.
5:43 I know Neil does things a little differently.
5:45 Maybe the shipping process is a little obscure.
5:48 Maybe he put the DVD like around a pigeon's head, his little hole,
5:52 and then he was just like,
5:53 "Deliver this to Curtis." But since I didn't receive that DVD,
5:57 that only meant I was extra excited when he recently
6:00 announced that Cade the Tortured Crossing was now available on digital.
6:04 So yeah, I bought the film for a third time.
6:06 And finally, I got it.
6:08 And we're going to talk about it today.
6:09 Before we do though, I urge you to please buy or rent Cade
6:14 the Tortured Crossing and just watch it with a group
6:17 of friends and I promise you it will be
6:19 the most enjoyable movie experience you've had all year.
6:22 So please go watch the full thing.
6:24 It is so awesome.
6:25 I will put the link in my description to rent or buy it.
6:28 So yeah, please go support it.
6:30 It is a lot of fun and you'll have a blast.
6:32 All right, now we got all the lore out of the way.
6:33 Let's hear a word from today's sponsor.
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9:01 All right, thank you Midas Merge.
9:02 Back to the video.
9:03 Hello, welcome back.
9:04 Let's talk about Cade the Tortured Crossing.
9:06 Movie starts with an establishing shot of Earth,
9:09 so I guess we know which planet it takes place on.
9:11 And then we get a title card.
9:12 And dude, right out of the gate, we're getting some ingenuity, man.
9:16 where most filmmakers would put a colon after Cade
9:19 and also capitalize the first letters of tortured and crossing.
9:23 Neil cannot stop himself from innovating.
9:25 Dude, we then cut to a woman
9:26 on the phone with the titular character Cade Altaire,
9:29 played by Neil Breen, of course.
9:31 Where are you?
9:31 Are you on your way?
9:32 Haven't forgotten about the charity event.
9:34 I'm running a little late.
9:36 And you'll notice right away that this film
9:38 is definitely Neil Breen's biggest creative endeavor so far.
9:42 Because unlike his past films that featured scenes filmed in real
9:45 life locations with green screen shots peppered in, this entire movie,
9:49 literally every single scene in this movie was filmed on a green screen.
9:54 And he utilizes stock photos as the backdrop.
9:57 But my favorite scenes are the ones where
9:59 he tries to edit himself into stock video.
10:01 Like this next scene for [Music] example,
10:11 I'm guessing he saw that stock footage clip somewhere and was like, "Yeah,
10:14 maybe my character could walk by and like
10:15 get smoked by that train real quick." Yeah,
10:17 that's a that's a normal thing that happens.
10:19 Also, mind you, Cade is canonically a superpowered cyborg with magical powers,
10:25 yet he's just like aimlessly walking around completely
10:27 oblivious to the slowest moving train of all time.
10:30 It just goes to show you, man, superpowers or not, you got to look both ways.
10:34 We then cut to a scene of this homeless person getting kidnapped,
10:37 and then we see another person get
10:38 kidnapped from this like dingy abandoned hospital.
10:41 And now those kidnapped people are trapped in a van
10:44 along with some other kidnapped people, I assume.
10:46 But luckily, Cade is there to save the day.
10:49 Please come on.
10:51 Help.
10:52 Help us.
10:53 Help us.
10:54 I'll help you.
10:55 I'll follow you wherever they're taking you and I'll free you.
10:59 Instead of Cade using his superpowers to like
11:02 rip the car door off its hinges or even
11:04 just using his regular human being strength
11:07 to like try to break the window or something,
11:09 he instead promises to follow them to wherever
11:12 they're being taken and then rescue them.
11:14 Makes sense.
11:14 If someone is like floating down a river about to like fall off a waterfall,
11:18 you don't want to rescue them while they're floating down the river, right?
11:20 You just got to be like, "Yeah, I'll just I'll meet you at the bottom." Also,
11:23 super funny how monotone and quiet Cade was
11:25 being when he was talking to those people.
11:27 They're screaming inside of the car and he's
11:29 out there just like, "I'll help you.
11:32 I'll follow you wherever they're taking you and I'll free you." But thankfully,
11:35 Cade is a man of his word.
11:37 He follows the van and he sets them free.
11:40 Get out of here.
11:41 Get out of here.
11:44 Get out of here.
11:46 Worst kidnappers ever, man.
11:47 Sorry to critique kidnapping.
11:49 I' I've obviously I don't I've never done it.
11:51 Lord knows I've tried.
11:53 You're going to steal these people and just leave them unattended?
11:56 Yeah, I got you.
11:58 And you're not going anywhere.
12:00 The only shot at survival you have is if a random
12:03 guy in a leather jacket walks in here and says,
12:05 "Get out of here." a few times in a row.
12:08 But that'll never happen.
12:10 All right, so now we got the first action sequence of the film.
12:12 And guys, it starts off with a bang.
12:20 Damn, we need to make this an even fighter.
12:30 yeah, dude.
12:32 All right.
12:32 Yeah.
12:33 Okay.
12:33 Se All right.
12:35 Several things.
12:36 Well, I guess Cade has the ability to uh duplicate himself.
12:40 I guess that's what he's doing right here.
12:41 I don't know how much it's really doing because
12:43 he clearly only knows how to do one move.
12:45 It's just like one slow punch and then like a like a half kick punch.
12:49 You know, duplicating yourself.
12:51 That's a pretty cool superpower, right?
12:52 very useful in a fight, I assume,
12:54 except for the fact that he can't land a single punch
12:56 on these people cuz I can't hear any punch sound effects.
13:01 I guess they aren't either.
13:02 I guess they're both kind of just It is frustrating that there are no punch
13:06 sound effects because I know Neil knows how
13:09 to edit in a punch sound effect, right?
13:11 I already heard one when he got hit by that train.
13:13 But anyways, the fight scene goes on for a really long time.
13:16 And finally, at the end of it all,
13:18 Cade stands there confused, standing above all their dead bodies.
13:23 Cade then makes the dramatic textbook Neil Breen getaway,
13:26 escaping just in the nick of time as the building explodes.
13:31 And in the wake of the explosion,
13:33 we meet some cops that will play a bigger part later on in the story.
13:36 Who was that guy?
13:37 Now that all those innocent people were rescued,
13:39 Neil can finally make his way to the charity fundraiser.
13:42 I'm on my way.
13:43 I'm running late.
13:44 And we get to watch this nice scene
13:45 of him driving this red Ferrari to the charity event.
13:52 Jesus, dude, slow [Music] down.
14:11 Jeez, dude.
14:12 Speed up.
14:12 All right, so this is actually where we find out the main plot of this film.
14:16 So Cade gives this nice speech to everybody at the charity event.
14:20 And in the speech, he tells everybody that he
14:22 has donated millions of dollars of his own money
14:25 to a local like failing mental hospital so they
14:28 can rebuild it and save all the patients lives.
14:31 I haven't even seen the hospital building yet.
14:34 I think it's a worthy project to take on for the sake of the patient.
14:37 Yeah.
14:37 And this speech goes on for a very, very long time.
14:40 Kade says a bunch of generic stuff about
14:43 the patients and doing good for the community.
14:46 They are humanity.
14:49 They're intelligent.
14:52 We will never It's all about them.
14:57 We will never let them down.
14:59 And in between this rambling is the same
15:01 shot over and over again of this woman clapping.
15:04 Hold them back and love.
15:08 Kade finally ends his speech and receives a standing
15:10 ovation as he gracefully walks down the stairs.
15:14 And you know what I got to say?
15:15 Neil's use of green screen has greatly improved since his last film.
15:19 This man purchased a green staircase and never looked back because
15:23 he utilizes stairs so much in this film and I love it.
15:26 It just makes everything that much more believable.
15:28 But think about how much more believable it would have
15:30 looked if it's with some extra money from old Kurt.
15:34 All right, now we get a little more exposition.
15:35 Okay, this is a point where we meet all of the secondary characters.
15:38 And again, most movies will let the viewer
15:40 figure out on their own who these characters are,
15:43 you know, based on what they do and how they interact with each other.
15:46 But when others Zigg Neil Zags So this is
15:48 how we find out who all the characters are.
15:50 Hi, I'm Tom.
15:51 I'm a police chief around here.
15:53 Hi, I'm I'm Dr.
15:53 Megan Burns.
15:54 I'm actually the the director of the hospital here at Spring.
15:57 Hi, I'm Dr.
15:58 Megan Curts.
15:59 I'm the co-director of the hospital.
16:01 Hi, I'm Andrew with Child Protective Services.
16:03 How you doing?
16:04 Detective Lee here with Child Trafficking Protective Service.
16:07 Perfect.
16:07 Now we know.
16:08 I will make sure they live their lives to the fullest.
16:11 Sorry, he is still giving his speech in a different room now.
16:14 I haven't even seen the hospital yet, but I was happy to give them the money.
16:17 As Cade has said repeatedly, he's never actually seen the hospital,
16:21 but he is donating millions of dollars of his own money to it.
16:24 I haven't even seen the hospital building yet.
16:26 I haven't even seen the hospital yet.
16:28 But fortunately for us, we get to see the mental hospital before Kade does.
16:32 So, let's see what it's like.
16:33 Can't be that bad.
16:43 Holy I don't think that's a hospital, dude.
16:45 I think that's an abandoned haunted building.
16:47 What the dude?
16:48 Jigsaw would look at this video and be like, "No, bro.
16:50 That's too dirty." Who are these doctors working there, too?
16:53 Like, wouldn't you want to like report this to somebody?
16:55 Feel bad for them, man.
16:56 I feel like being a doctor is hard enough, man.
16:58 You shouldn't have to worry about like ghouls and goblins at the hospital, too.
17:02 It is really funny to picture these doctors
17:04 like talking to regular doctors in the real world.
17:07 I know it's a hard job.
17:08 I had to do a triple bypass surgery today.
17:11 Took 6 hours.
17:12 I didn't even have time for lunch.
17:14 Oh my god.
17:14 I know.
17:15 It's so stressful, right?
17:16 And the demons.
17:18 Like, hello.
17:20 This is not your plane of existence.
17:22 Wait, hold what demons?
17:25 Yeah, you know the demons.
17:27 The demons at the hospital,
17:28 they sometimes show up and they like pray on the vulnerable
17:30 and the weak and they suck them dry until the very last moment.
17:34 Oh, health insurance representatives.
17:37 Sorry to interrupt, but you guys got to get down to the Nintendo store quick.
17:40 They're giving out free Luigi.
17:42 But even though this hospital is in shambles,
17:44 they still find the time to organize field trips for the patients,
17:46 which is really nice.
17:47 Get ready.
17:48 We're going on a field trip.
17:49 And I don't know if this is due to a lack of actors,
17:51 but you'll notice that these mental hospital patients are the same
17:54 people who were kidnapped and also just rescued by Cade.
17:57 So, I guess they got kidnapped right after and brought here.
18:00 Hey, get those things out of my SUV.
18:03 Get them out.
18:04 This one, too.
18:07 Crutch.
18:07 Why can't they have crutches in the SUV?
18:09 Also, who calls their SUV an SUV?
18:12 It's called a car.
18:12 So many questions here, but isn't this a mental hospital?
18:15 I've never been.
18:16 Does everyone in a mental hospital just have a broken leg at all times?
18:19 Actually, I feel like that's probably something
18:20 they would have done in like the 60s.
18:22 Sorry, you're hearing voices in your head.
18:24 Okay.
18:24 Well, we're going to go ahead and break
18:25 your leg so you'll be focused on that instead.
18:27 But yeah, this next scene is it's a little confusing for a few reasons.
18:30 They start driving for their field trip
18:32 and the driver immediately starts drinking some beers,
18:35 which is very funny because I assume the reason the driver threw the crutches
18:40 out of the SUV was because they're dangerous and could cause an accident.
18:43 So, him immediately drinking a beer after making a fuss about that.
18:47 Super funny.
18:48 What the hell are you doing?
18:50 Put that away.
18:51 And also another question.
18:52 Where is she supposed to be sitting in this shot?
18:55 She's on the floor in the back seat.
18:57 What the going on?
18:58 Be careful, you fool.
19:00 Everybody is doing everything wrong in this car.
19:02 And shockingly, they get into an accident.
19:10 All right, so everybody survived except for the driver.
19:12 I get I mean he's he's nowhere to be found.
19:15 So I can only assume his body exploded and disintegrated upon impact.
19:20 And obviously everybody's freaking out.
19:22 They don't know what to do.
19:23 What the hell are we going to do?
19:24 They realize they don't have any cell phone service.
19:26 So they decide to start walking to find some help.
19:28 Remarkably, because I mean before the accident,
19:31 everybody needed crutches to walk.
19:33 But then they all get in an accident and everybody walks just fine.
19:36 So it's a drunk driving miracle.
19:38 We then cut to Cade aimlessly walking through
19:41 an open field when he encounters every hiker's worst nightmare.
19:46 A tiger.
19:52 Man, Kate has got to be the most nonchalant dude in the world.
19:56 Imagine walking through a field and a white tiger charges
20:00 at you and your reaction is just [Music] But guys,
20:08 what happens next is jaw-dropping.
20:12 [Music] This CG tiger is reacting better
20:30 to the punches than actual human beings.
20:32 This fight scene goes on again for a very long time.
20:35 But I have to admit this is probably
20:37 the best Neil Breen fight scene of all time.
20:39 I honestly think the majority of the film's budget went to this fight scene.
20:43 And I love that.
20:44 Dude, you're telling me we got a custom 3D animated
20:47 tiger fight in a Neil Breen film before GTA 6?
20:50 What a time to be alive, man.
20:51 But let's see who wins the fight.
20:53 Get down.
20:57 Let's go.
21:00 They were homies the whole time.
21:02 Yeah, pretty cool.
21:02 I didn't know you could just I didn't know you could do that with a tiger.
21:04 I didn't know you could just squash beef like that.
21:06 If only it was Sig Freed and Roy and also Kate.
21:09 Probably could have avoided some injury there.
21:11 It's a good lesson though, man.
21:12 If you if you ever getting mauled by a tiger, you can just talk it out.
21:16 Okay, I've got a gut feeling you're upset with me.
21:20 Okay, that was my kidney.
21:21 But I guess that's why I have two of them.
21:23 Listen, Tiger, if you got something to say, I'm all ears.
21:27 Ah, guess I kind of walked into that one.
21:29 All right, that's it.
21:30 No more Mr.
21:31 Nice Guy.
21:31 Eat a huge dick.
21:40 Kick me while I'm down.
21:42 So Kate is walking with this white
21:44 tiger and they spot the mental hospital patients.
21:47 So, the tiger turns into a woman, blows him a kiss, and disappears.
21:51 You know, just classic tiger And Cade tells
21:54 the mental hospital people that he has a house nearby,
21:57 and he offers for them to stay there for the night.
22:00 I've got a home over the mountain.
22:01 You're welcome to stay there.
22:02 But obviously, they're a little skeptical.
22:04 We don't know anything about you.
22:05 Which is a little confusing coming from her because both of them were
22:08 literally just at the same fundraiser for that hospital that they came from.
22:13 Excellent work, Kade.
22:14 We're all proud of you.
22:15 We back you 100%.
22:16 I don't trust this.
22:18 But anyways, they all agree to go stay at Kad's house for the night.
22:27 [Music] We need to stick together.
22:31 [Music] Kick brushed over that entirely too quickly.
22:36 We need to stick together or else the man
22:38 in jeans will grab your arm and scream.
22:40 They finally make it to Cad's house after a painfully long walk.
22:46 And Cade obviously lives in a castle.
22:49 And all the patients have very normal reactions to it.
22:52 I love this place.
22:53 I just can't wait to get in there.
22:55 What a trip.
22:56 Careful.
22:57 Holy It's a castle.
22:59 I wonder if it's haunted.
23:00 We're going to a castle.
23:02 And once they get into the castle, oh man,
23:04 Cade turns on the charm and he is the most welcoming host of all time.
23:08 This is amazing.
23:10 This is awesome.
23:12 It's huge.
23:13 Wa!
23:15 You all look like a big happy family.
23:17 Hey, damn.
23:17 Buddy on the ground.
23:18 Cannot believe his eyes, dude.
23:20 Holy I thought castles were made up, man.
23:23 What the Holy It's a castle.
23:26 Uh, we then get a nice little
23:27 flashback from Cade talking about his twin brother.
23:31 I haven't seen him for years.
23:32 And then everybody goes to sleep on the ground.
23:34 We're all just going to stay right here on the carpet tonight.
23:37 big ass castle with a million rooms, but everyone's like, "Nah, it.
23:40 I'm going to thug it out on the ground." Holy It's a castle.
23:43 I'm a little confused though because the only reason they walked away
23:46 from their drunk driving accident is
23:49 because they didn't have cell phone service.
23:50 There's no damn cell phone service here.
23:53 But like surely you have cell phone service now at his house, right?
23:57 This man is like a tech millionaire.
23:58 He's got to have like internet, some way to call the police or something, right?
24:02 Call an ambulance.
24:03 All of you guys were just in a drunk driving accident and the driver exploded.
24:08 What kind of nurses are you?
24:09 You get back down here.
24:11 You get back down here right now, girl.
24:13 Yo, she's crazy.
24:15 Come back down now.
24:16 Get down from there, girl.
24:18 Come on.
24:21 You can't take her anywhere, man.
24:22 But again, we're using those stairs, dude.
24:24 Love to see it.
24:25 And I know the plot has been pretty awesome and crazy so far,
24:27 but it's about to get even crazier.
24:29 One of the patients wakes up in the middle of the night
24:31 and ends up getting chased by Cad's evil twin brother, Kale.
24:35 That's right, guys.
24:36 Cad's evil AI cyborg twin brother, Kale, has returned.
24:40 And he is extra evil this time around.
24:49 Yeah, man.
24:49 He's out here grabbing limbs, man.
24:51 He's not really doing anything else to you, but you know, still not ideal, dude.
24:55 I don't want Kale appearing out of thin air.
24:58 Unless we're talking about a salad, but we're not.
25:02 This is a movie.
25:02 So, in the middle of the night,
25:03 while Kale is running around his brother's house and grabbing limbs,
25:07 Cade leaves his castle because he has some business to attend to.
25:10 I've got a crashed SUV to repair.
25:13 Yeah.
25:13 So, Cade walks all the way back to where they crashed their SUV,
25:18 and he uses his superpowers to fix this destroyed [Music] SUV.
25:29 Cade, you're the best superhero ever.
25:31 I got to say though, Cad's superpowers are like never really explained.
25:36 He can duplicate himself.
25:37 I guess he can manipulate matter.
25:39 He has super strength.
25:40 He has like every superpower.
25:42 I think it's kind of like when you find out all the things Superman can do,
25:44 and you're like, "All right, man.
25:45 Enough." That's actually like not fair.
25:47 Did you know that Superman can wipe people's memories with a kiss?
25:50 That's a real thing he can do.
25:51 I might need to make out with Superman after watching this movie, dude.
25:54 But thanks to Cad's superpowers,
25:56 the patients can go back to the mental hospital.
25:59 Go now.
25:59 Be safe.
26:00 I don't know why they want to though,
26:02 considering the building is like dilapidated and filthy and falling apart.
26:05 Like, you got to be crazy to want to go back there.
26:08 Be strong.
26:09 And I love this scene a lot because all the patients
26:11 are in the SUV like pressing their hands against the window,
26:14 you know, saying goodbye to Cade, right?
26:15 And also thanking him.
26:16 And first off, this nurse can't believe it.
26:20 And secondly, on the close-up shot,
26:21 it's really funny because I guess they couldn't have the windows like rolled all
26:24 the way up because then you'd be able
26:26 to see the camera and the windows reflection.
26:28 So to get around this, I guess Neil just had
26:30 the actors pretend there was a sheet of glass between them,
26:33 which looks so silly now because they're just notice
26:36 they're all just holding their hands up like this.
26:39 And it's just like just don't have them do that then.
26:41 If there's going to be a reflection when they put
26:42 their hands on, just don't have them put their hands on.
26:44 Is that integral to the plot?
26:46 Go now.
26:47 He's safe.
26:47 Okay, so we're now a half hour into the film
26:50 and Cade finally shows up to the hospital for the first time.
26:53 By the way, this is the hospital he is
26:55 donating millions of dollars of his own money to.
26:57 and the place is a hole.
26:58 So obviously he's a little upset.
27:01 What the hell's going on here?
27:03 We're doing the best we can.
27:05 We're trying.
27:06 That's not good enough.
27:08 And look, I totally understand him being a little upset that, you know,
27:11 the money that he donated isn't really being used to fix the hospital, right?
27:15 But also at the same time, Cade, you have every superpower ever.
27:21 I just watched you put a destroyed SUV back together.
27:25 Why not just do that with the hospital?
27:28 It's free.
27:29 Or maybe that power is exclusive to SUV repair.
27:32 I don't know.
27:32 If that's the case, duplicate yourself like you did earlier and have
27:36 all those cades lend a hand to like clean up the hospital.
27:39 Like there's things you can do, man.
27:40 This is like the equivalent of Bruce
27:42 Wayne having like billions of dollars and instead
27:45 of donating that money to organizations that will
27:47 like actually stop crime and poverty, he's just like,
27:50 "What if I'm an awesome bat instead and I can break a guy's
27:53 spine in half or selling a dime bag of weed?" But anyways,
27:56 the scene immediately after that one features the girl
27:59 from before getting her arm grabbed by the arm grabber.
28:02 And then we get probably my favorite scene in the whole movie.
28:06 [Music] It's a castle.
28:13 Let him cook, dude.
28:15 Whoever passes me the aux in the Uber this summer,
28:17 this is what I'm throwing [Music] on.
28:23 Last year was a brat summer.
28:24 Okay, but I'm calling it this summer.
28:26 We're getting the haunted mental hospital bathroom piano solo summer, dude.
28:31 Cade spends the next few minutes walking around
28:33 the hospital getting absolutely disgusted by what he sees.
28:37 And you know what?
28:37 I don't blame him.
28:40 This is disgusting.
28:43 You're not really helping.
28:49 Now guys, I know you may have some questions regarding the plot,
28:52 but this is when the movie really starts to put some pieces together.
28:55 So, at the hospital,
28:56 there's this like evil doctor conducting some kind of experiment on one
28:59 of the patients and it's not going the way it's supposed to.
29:02 Gene editing experiment is all wrong.
29:04 And then Neil does something really interesting here.
29:07 Usually in films, they'll show you things that are happening and then you
29:11 as a viewer get to sort of figure things out on your own.
29:14 That sounds fun, right?
29:15 Wrong.
29:15 I think it's much better when the character flat out addresses
29:19 the camera and just outright explains everything they're doing and why.
29:22 I assist in the kidnapping of the youth
29:25 to become experimental patients at the hospital.
29:27 My payment for this is access to the gene editing drugs for my use.
29:33 So now we know the hooded figure that keeps grabbing people's arms is Kale.
29:38 He's the arm grabber.
29:39 So he's kidnapping people,
29:41 bringing them to this mental hospital or or no or some of them.
29:45 And when they're there,
29:46 they get kidnapped again and then they get experimented on.
29:50 And if that's the case,
29:51 why did the the patients want to go back to the mental hospital?
29:55 Like, why are they excited to go back, right?
29:57 They're all kidnapped.
30:01 Okay, but regardless, whatever.
30:03 Once they're once the once the people are at the hospital,
30:06 then Kale kidnaps them again and moves them to a different part of the hospital.
30:10 So, I don't know if that's kidnapping.
30:11 It's sort of just like non-consensually moving someone.
30:15 I guess that is that's another way of kidnapping, I guess.
30:17 And since Kale is doing this, he has access to the hospital's
30:21 experimental gene editing drugs to cure himself of his sickness.
30:25 Hoping that they will cure me.
30:27 I also don't think he needs gene editing.
30:29 They fit just fine.
30:34 Yeah.
30:34 This next part is also confusing because we see this guy,
30:37 none of them have names really, but uh this we'll call him the tall guy.
30:41 So this tall guy's arm, he it gets grabbed by Kale.
30:44 But it's a little confusing cuz we saw him we saw him at the castle, right?
30:47 And then we saw him at the hospital.
30:49 So I don't know if this is a flashback when he
30:51 got brought to the hospital or if he was kidnapped once,
30:53 released and then kidnapped again.
30:55 Like I don't know if this is a second kidnapping.
30:57 I don't know.
30:58 Not again.
30:59 All right.
31:00 All right.
31:00 Never mind.
31:00 Not again.
31:01 This is in fact the second time he's been kidnapped by Kale.
31:04 Jesus Christ.
31:05 Never put a single thought of weakness
31:08 into the flourishing mind of the patients.
31:11 What the hell are you talking about?
31:15 Cade, do something.
31:18 Anything.
31:18 You're a superpowered robot and all you do the entire movie is
31:22 aimlessly walk around this haunted hospital just saying a bunch of Do something.
31:28 Like, is he a patient here?
31:30 He must be.
31:30 His superpowers and his evil twin brother, they have to be hallucinations.
31:34 I I'm convinced this is Shudder Island, dude.
31:37 Island.
31:38 Anyways, we got a few more minutes of some random happening at the hospital.
31:42 Please don't let them hurt me anymore.
31:46 [Music] Holy It's a cast.
31:54 And oh guys, I haven't really touched on the acting yet, which is surprising.
31:58 And I don't want to say it's bad.
32:00 I really don't.
32:00 Get the hell out of here.
32:02 Oh, but I will say the actors definitely made some interesting choices,
32:07 especially in this next scene.
32:11 Oh my god.
32:16 Amazing.
32:17 No notes.
32:18 That is definitely how human beings react when they see something terrifying.
32:28 [Music] If you're confused about the Kale storyline here,
32:38 don't fret because in this next scene, we get some more exposition as to why
32:42 Kale needs access to this gene editing medicine.
32:45 The artificial intelligence implants that were experimentally performed
32:50 on us as children are failing on me, but seem to be working on K.
32:56 And while Kale is having an existential crisis,
32:58 we cut to yet another shot of Cade just meandering around the hospital rounds.
33:02 But this time he walks into hell.
33:06 I think the only way of finding the limits of the possible
33:10 is by going beyond that we can make a difference with their kind.
33:14 All right.
33:14 Yeah.
33:15 I do love that no matter what is happening in a scene,
33:18 Neil always has the exact same lifeless expression.
33:21 I guess it was kind of smart to make himself a robot
33:23 in these films cuz now the lack of emotion kind of makes sense.
33:26 But I swear to God, his character could
33:28 be watching an orphanage burn to the ground
33:30 and he'd still just be like when I enter
33:33 the nonchalant contest and my opponent is Neil Marine.
33:36 We then get some more pointless scenes with the police officers.
33:39 I got new information on the kidnapping of those patients.
33:42 And then we get this hilarious line from one of the nurses.
33:44 I've built a thriving business here and I won't
33:47 let anyone disturb it or spoil it for me.
33:50 If that hospital is a thriving business to you,
33:53 I would hate to see a failing one.
33:55 But then, by some miracle, the police officers show up to the mental hospital.
34:00 I can't believe patients live here.
34:02 This place scares the hell out of me.
34:04 I could never live here.
34:07 Jesus, man.
34:08 Worst cops ever.
34:09 I could never live here.
34:10 Yeah, man.
34:10 It's not like they want to live there.
34:12 They were kidnapped.
34:14 You're also there to like rescue the people who are forced to live there, dude.
34:17 What the Imagine a cop walking into an active
34:20 crime scene and recreating that goofy meme.
34:22 We then get another shot of a guy getting his arm
34:24 grabbed by Kale and then Cade confronts the blonde nurse.
34:28 What do you know about the patient trafficking that's going on here?
34:32 What do you know about the gene editing research?
34:34 Okay, I fully thought Cade had like no idea
34:37 about what was happening because like all he's done
34:39 for the past few days is just like half-hazardly
34:42 like just roam around and just say pointless you know?
34:45 But I guess he's aware that there's
34:47 like evil experiments happening on these people.
34:49 He knows all of it is happening and yet he's still
34:51 donating the money and he's still not doing anything about it.
34:54 Cool.
34:55 You must know something.
34:56 Oh buddy, I don't even think that lady knows where she is at the moment.
34:59 Oh yeah.
34:59 Also, every 5 minutes in this movie,
35:01 we get some shots of Kale walking around the hospital
35:04 just like straight up injecting like bloody needles into himself.
35:07 And when he's not doing that, he's collapsing on the ground.
35:11 Who am I?
35:12 What am I?
35:14 And I'm no doctor, but I feel like those two things are probably connected.
35:19 Sorry, this movie like jumps around a lot,
35:21 so it's tough to really know like how much time has passed.
35:24 But in this next scene,
35:25 Cade is at a different charity event with this blonde nurse,
35:28 and he has his arm around her.
35:30 So, I guess they're dating now.
35:31 We're doing the best we can.
35:33 Corporate is in charge of the work and the money.
35:35 That's not good enough.
35:37 It's my damn money.
35:38 And I'm sorry if I'm beating a dead horse here, but do something, Cade.
35:41 Beat a dead horse if you have to.
35:43 That's something.
35:44 That's more than what you're doing.
35:45 You're both complaining about the safety and well-being of these patients
35:48 while you're both at like this fancy party together.
35:53 dude.
35:53 But at this gallery, we get some very funny dialogue between the characters
35:56 where they state their occupation before they say anything.
35:59 As an officer of the law, as a member of the corporation,
36:02 as the director of the hospital,
36:03 as a police officer, also, dude, I just realized this.
36:06 What the did the cops do at the mental hospital?
36:08 What did they even do there?
36:09 They showed up and they were like, "Ew,
36:10 this place is gross." And then they dipped.
36:12 What the Please get your hands up.
36:15 Oh, ew.
36:17 Ew.
36:17 This place is stinky.
36:20 Let's get out of here, guys.
36:21 I'm in the NYPD, not the NYPDU.
36:24 And guys, trust me, I know nothing really makes sense in this film,
36:27 but that's why it's awesome.
36:28 Okay, and it's about to get even more awesome.
36:30 We now cut to a courtroom scene where all
36:33 the mental health patients are the jury, I guess.
36:36 But the trial is also about like the well-being of the patients.
36:39 So I don't know if that's allowed that.
36:41 I feel like that's pretty big conflict of interest.
36:43 The patients deserve the best that we can.
36:46 Judge, hold on.
36:49 They deserve every opportunity to succeed and this law will do just that.
36:54 Okay, great.
36:54 They passed a law that will help
36:56 rescue these patients from that terrible mental hospital.
36:59 Movie over, right?
37:00 Wrong.
37:00 Again, right after that scene,
37:02 all the patients are right back at the mental hospital.
37:05 Dude, I don't think a law was passed at all.
37:07 I'm honestly surprised or the real judge
37:10 didn't walk into that courtroom and it's like, "What the are you guys doing?
37:12 Get out of here." I really don't know where they're taking them,
37:16 but I think it might be near the hospital or in the hospital.
37:23 Oh my god, dude.
37:24 Next, we get yet another scene of the tall guy getting kidnapped.
37:28 And look, man, I don't want to victim blame here,
37:30 but how the hell are you going to get kidnapped three times, dude?
37:34 Yeah, it's a little crazy.
37:35 You know, kidnapped me once, shame on you.
37:37 Kidnap me twice, shame on me.
37:39 Kidnap me three times.
37:42 Come on.
37:42 You know you want it.
37:43 Maybe they keep bringing the tall guy back
37:45 because they think it says men tall hospital.
37:50 So dumb.
37:50 The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to become.
38:00 Man, imagine you got kidnapped and locked up in an abandoned mental hospital.
38:05 Every day, people do experimental surgeries on you.
38:08 There's a guy making weird music on a keyboard.
38:10 You also just got into a drunk driving
38:12 accident and probably have untreated injuries from that.
38:15 You stay the night in this stranger's castle.
38:18 And then you're brought to a courtroom by that stranger who gets your hopes up
38:22 about a rescue only to immediately bring you
38:24 right back to that same abandoned mental hospital.
38:26 And while all of this awful is happening to you,
38:29 there's a guy in a leather jacket walking around the mental hospital.
38:33 Like, you know, I'm a rich robot, right?
38:35 That would drive me crazy, man.
38:37 I'd be like, "Help us.
38:38 What are you doing?" Good night, sweet princess.
38:41 Okay.
38:42 And princesses.
38:43 Good save.
38:45 Oh my god, I forgot about this part.
38:47 Holy Okay, guys.
38:48 I will say when this part happened in theaters, people went wild.
38:52 It was so much fun.
38:55 [Music] Yeah.
39:10 For no reason whatsoever, all the patients in the mental hospital
39:14 break out into this choreographed dance routine.
39:18 Is this what the gene editing is doing?
39:20 Making everybody sick at dancing?
39:22 Billy Jean editing?
39:23 Also, the the two nurses are there wearing wigs.
39:26 I assume they didn't have enough actors for this big dance number.
39:28 So, I guess they had the actors who play the nurses
39:30 just throw on some wigs to like be the other patients.
39:33 And it's like again, why?
39:35 Nah.
39:35 The random choreographed dance outside the abandoned mental
39:39 hospital isn't really believable with only four people.
39:41 You two get in there.
39:42 I'm not going to lie though, they are it up.
39:46 They it up so hard that they
39:48 all summon spectral doppelgangers that dance beside them.
39:51 Yeah, I don't know if I'll ever dance that well.
39:53 If they ever make it out of the hospital, they have a big future.
39:55 They should go on that show.
39:56 What's it called?
39:56 So You Think You Can Summon other worldly beings.
39:59 After all the patients happily dance
40:00 their troubles away for two uninterrupted minutes.
40:08 We get another lengthy shot of Kale injecting more
40:10 blood into his veins and falling all over the place.
40:12 Shots of the patients freaking out.
40:14 And the blonde nurse finds out the blonde patient has been killed.
40:17 What did they do to you?
40:18 Just overall, everything is sad and scary in the hospital right now.
40:21 And where is our kindhearted, superpowered protagonist during all of this?
40:26 He's out in the forest canoodling with the blonde nurse.
40:28 I need you, bro.
40:31 Can we talk about the political and economic
40:33 state of that mental hospital right now, man?
40:34 People are dying, Kade.
40:36 And you're spending your time hugging this incompetent nurse,
40:40 walking a few steps,
40:41 hugging her again, getting down on your knees, and hugging her again.
40:44 Now is not the time to get laid, Kade.
40:46 There's people in there in straight jackets.
40:48 You're in the forest straight jacket.
40:50 It is a little difficult to care about this romance at this point of the film,
40:53 but hey, it's a Neil Breen movie.
40:55 He's got to hug and kiss the girl.
40:56 And I hate to say it, we're almost at the end of this movie.
40:58 Okay, we cut to a shot of Kale
41:00 with a bloodied face as he explains what's happening to him.
41:03 My AI systems are failing me and my physical disintegration is proceeding.
41:09 All right, thank you for telling us.
41:10 Now, we cut back to Kade.
41:11 Thankfully, he stopped making out with that girl.
41:13 And guys, you're not going to believe it,
41:14 but Kade is finally going to do something to rescue the patient.
41:19 What do you think he's going to do?
41:20 Do you think A use his superpowers to repair the hospital?
41:24 B use his superpowers to kill the evil doctors,
41:27 C use his superpowers to help the victim's escape,
41:31 or D use his superpowers to just save his twin brother.
41:36 What do you think?
41:36 The answer is actually a secret fifth option.
41:39 Pay decides to train the patients in hand-to-hand combat.
41:43 Very good.
41:44 Very good.
41:44 Excellent.
41:45 Excellent work.
41:46 Very nice fighting technique.
41:48 That's the way to practice.
41:50 Cade, you're a bad guy.
41:52 These are kidnapping victims and you're there teaching them karate.
41:56 I'm sorry, man.
41:56 If you're not actively trying to free them or take down whoever kidnapped them,
42:01 you're part of the problem, dude.
42:02 Use everything I've taught you.
42:04 You haven't taught them anything, man.
42:05 You've been aimlessly walking around this hospital
42:08 and mumbling to yourself for days, dude.
42:10 Eventually, the society of brave hearts will rise.
42:14 Later on that night, uh,
42:15 we see Cade back in the the patient's room and he gives him a little pep talk.
42:19 They are coming for you, my warriors.
42:22 This is what I've been preparing you for.
42:24 Super funny to call them my warriors after
42:26 talking to them for just just one afternoon.
42:28 Regardless, it is now time for the big climax of the movie.
42:31 After all the no training from Cade,
42:33 the patients now have the power and courage to stand up to their oppressors.
42:37 You're done.
42:37 The tall guy strangles the evil doctor to death,
42:40 and the evil corporation is destroyed.
42:42 The gene editing experiment is going well.
42:47 Patients are money.
42:53 Oh my god.
42:55 Okay.
42:55 Sorry.
42:56 That genuinely scares me every time.
42:58 Also, did Cade make them explode?
43:00 Is that another one of his superpowers?
43:01 He can just make things explode wherever.
43:03 So, he doesn't use his superpowers to to save the kidnapping victims,
43:06 but he'll use it for uh terrorism.
43:09 Nice.
43:09 We now cut back to the mental hospital
43:10 where Cade is now fighting some masked bad guys.
43:14 I also don't know if I'd use the word fighting because he's kind of just like
43:16 standing there while the bad guys just miss
43:19 every single punch and kick that they throw.
43:21 And then we get a nice recycled scene from earlier in the film.
43:25 Damn, we need to make this an even fight.
43:33 I'll tell you though, this next scene is not recycled though.
43:36 This is a brand new one.
43:39 I am the winged warrior.
43:40 Okay, I'm fully convinced this is all just
43:42 a shared psychosis that all of these people are experiencing.
43:45 I am a winged warrior.
43:46 This fight scene where nobody lands a single punch goes on for a very long time.
43:50 And I think the sequence truly shows the genius of Neil Brain.
43:54 In every acting class I've ever been in, when
43:56 they teach you like stage fighting, you know,
43:57 they tell you to like position your body in a way so when you throw the punch,
44:01 the audience doesn't see the fist actually isn't hitting anything, right?
44:04 But to the audience, it looks like the fist is hitting the person, right?
44:07 But again, Neil Breen is like, "Fuck that That's been done before, right?
44:10 Let's go full profile shot." So,
44:12 you know, there isn't a single punch connecting.
44:15 Okay.
44:15 And let's take it one step further.
44:16 No sound effects.
44:18 Everybody knows movies are only allowed one punch sound effect.
44:22 And I already used that up when I got hit by that train.
44:24 But after an incredibly lengthy fight scene,
44:29 like a really long fight scene, the only person left standing is Cade.
44:34 Everybody is dead now.
44:36 I guess that single afternoon of training wasn't enough.
44:39 Hey man, their blood is on your hands.
44:41 Courage is the first of human qualities because
44:45 it is the quality that guarantees all others.
45:21 Okay.
45:22 Holy That was a long silence there, dude.
45:24 You think Neil was planning for like
45:25 an Andrew Garfield and No Way Home type moment?
45:28 You know that scene when Andrew Garfield jumps
45:29 out of the portal and he's just like Okay.
45:35 Because they knew that the crowd was going to be going crazy, right?
45:38 Maybe that's what he was expecting.
45:39 And that clip of Andrew Garfield is awkward to watch.
45:41 And it's like 4 seconds long.
45:43 Maybe this was like 30 seconds.
45:44 And you'll think people are going to be freaking out for 30 seconds at that.
45:48 Hey y'all, come look at this.
45:49 Courage is the first of human qualities because
45:54 it is the quality that guarantees all others.
45:58 But finally, a glimmer of hope.
45:59 Okay, the cops are on their way.
46:02 I I mean, for a second time, I guess.
46:03 I forgot they're already there, but but they do something this time.
46:06 I hope.
46:06 What is that?
46:08 Their wings from a winged warrior.
46:12 Okay.
46:13 Yeah.
46:14 Honestly, if I were those cops, I'd leave, too, dude.
46:17 Their wings from a winged warrior.
46:19 All right.
46:20 Yeah, this guy's insane.
46:21 Kale, where have you been?
46:24 I knew you were here.
46:26 I could feel your presence.
46:28 I'm so ashamed.
46:30 Kate, I'm so ashamed.
46:33 Look what's happened to me.
46:34 Wow.
46:35 Heartbreaking performance.
46:36 This really is a year of actors
46:38 playing multiple versions of themselves, you know,
46:41 and it's impressive how he changes his performance,
46:43 you know, when he's Cade versus when he's Kale.
46:45 Like I said earlier, man, superpowers or not, you got to look both ways.
46:49 But guys, this is the final showdown between these twins.
46:52 And I think they're going to figure it out.
46:53 I think they can talk this through,
46:54 and I think they'll make it through together.
46:56 Kill me.
46:57 Kill me, kid.
46:58 kill me.
47:01 [Music] Or yeah, he could summon a sword
47:08 and stab his twin brother through the neck.
47:10 That works, too.
47:11 And again, could have summoned that sword days
47:13 ago and killed that evil doctor, but no.
47:15 Had to teach karate and hug a girl.
47:17 You know what?
47:17 I think the movie could end here, but obviously it does not.
47:21 [Music] Okay, so you could use your powers to change the hospital.
47:27 There's the confirmation right there, dude.
47:29 But the only thing you do is change the name of it.
47:32 Okay.
47:32 Yeah.
47:32 And also, I guess the patients didn't die.
47:35 From what I'm gathering, I think the patients have somehow progressed
47:38 into like the next stage of human evolution.
47:41 That's what one afternoon of training did with Cade.
47:43 You are now my warriors, caretakers of justice.
47:47 These are my new Avengers.
47:48 We then cut to some of the patients doing
47:50 an impression of my car keys before I go drinking.
47:52 Don't forget us.
47:53 And then we get an emotional goodbye from Cade.
47:56 I've got to go.
47:57 I'll be right here.
48:00 That's just a line from ET.
48:02 I'll be right here.
48:07 Funnily enough, it's also how the prequel to this film, Twisted Pair, ends.
48:11 I'll be right here.
48:13 But in this emotional moment, Cade walks away and leaves everybody behind.
48:19 They will never forget us.
48:21 Or Okay, not yet.
48:22 Sorry.
48:23 I will never leave you.
48:24 The Then why'd you say good?
48:26 Okay, I've got to go.
48:27 I will never leave you.
48:28 Damn, dude.
48:29 Really kept me on my toes there.
48:30 More movies got to do that, man.
48:31 Make you think one thing and then immediately abandon that idea.
48:34 What's in the box?
48:36 Your wife's head.
48:37 No, you're lying.
48:37 You You're a liar.
48:39 There's no way.
48:39 You're lying.
48:40 Yeah, you got me.
48:41 I am.
48:42 Sorry.
48:43 Oh, okay.
48:44 So So what's in the box?
48:46 Dang.
48:46 I forget, actually.
48:47 Can you check?
48:47 Okay.
48:48 Well, it can't be that bad.
48:50 What is it?
48:51 It's your wife's head.
48:56 So, no head, I got to take you to jail.
49:02 No, I hate jail.
49:03 Hollywood, take notes, man.
49:04 Start putting that in your movies.
49:06 But anyways, the movie ends with Cade and the nurse
49:08 walking off into the forest as the credits roll.
49:10 Made in the USA.
49:12 Nice, man.
49:12 These are the movies we can look forward to if
49:14 Trump actually goes through with those movie tariffs, too.
49:17 That's sweet.
49:18 So, there you have it, man.
49:19 That was Cade the Tortured Crossing.
49:21 Sorry this video is so long,
49:22 but there's just so many things to address and I left out a lot also.
49:25 So, like I said, please go watch this full movie.
49:27 It is so much fun.
49:28 Honestly, it was a blast when I saw it in theaters.
49:30 It's a blast when I watched it on digital.
49:32 Jury still out if it's a blast to watch on DVD cuz I never received mine,
49:36 but I assume it's probably the same as digital.
49:38 Took a big chance filming an entire movie on a green screen.
49:41 That is not only a lot of work during the post-production process,
49:44 but it's also a huge undertaking during the pre-production,
49:47 like finding all of the photos and stuff because like
49:49 there are scenes where he's like specifically like ducking under stuff.
49:52 Like everything was planned very meticulously and you know,
49:54 you can't forget about all the stairs.
49:56 So, you can tell there's a lot of work that went in.
49:57 I think that's great.
49:58 And at the very core of this film, there is a really cool idea there,
50:01 but just some aspects of it made it just a little frustrating.
50:04 Like the fact that we still don't know what happened to that drunk driver.
50:07 you know what the gene editing surgeries were actually for.
50:10 Or the fact that Kate is essentially Superman.
50:12 He has like every superpower ever.
50:14 Yet, he doesn't do anything at all to actually
50:16 like save the people who need his help.
50:18 But like I've always said, every movie is good.
50:21 And this one is no exception because this film,
50:23 funnily enough, actually taught me a lot.
50:25 This movie is about a superpowered cyborg who
50:28 spends most of his time aimlessly and disappointedly walking
50:32 the halls of this abandoned hospital that he personally
50:35 donated millions of dollars of his own money towards.
50:38 And he is constantly upset by the fact that his money
50:41 isn't being utilized the way he intended it to be utilized.
50:45 And that really struck a chord for me, you know,
50:46 because like I said at the beginning of this video,
50:48 years ago, I genuinely tried to give money to Neil to help fund this movie.
50:53 this movie, a movie about when you give large amounts
50:57 of your own money to someone embarking on a business venture,
51:00 you never really know how they're going to use it.
51:02 And they often don't use the money
51:04 the way that you would probably use that money.
51:07 So, in a roundabout way,
51:08 me not being able to donate money to this movie taught me that it
51:12 was probably a good thing that I was unable to donate money to this movie.
51:15 This probably would have been me the whole time
51:16 if I was able to actually fund this movie.
51:18 This is my money.
51:19 What the hell's going on?
51:20 Regardless, Kade the Tortured Crossing gets a 9 out of 10 for me.
51:24 I'll bump it up to a 10 when I get the DVD.
51:26 All right, that's it.
51:26 Thank you so much for watching this video.
51:27 I hope you enjoyed it, okay?
51:29 If you did, please press a like button cuz believe it or not,
51:31 one like equals one tiger that I will square up with, okay?
51:35 I promise.
51:36 Leave a comment.
51:36 Let me know what you thought.
51:37 And let me know if you actually buy and watch this movie, okay?
51:40 Because I please I I can't stress it enough.
51:42 You guys have to watch the full thing.
51:44 It is awesome.
51:44 Press the subscribe button if you want cuz uh the second you do,
51:47 you become a valued citizen of Curtistown.
51:49 If you didn't know, Curtistown is the best place to live in the world,
51:51 and I'm the mayor, so you have to be nice to me.
51:53 It's the law.
51:54 Come see me on tour.
51:54 I'm doing a bunch more shows in the US.
51:57 These are the last shows in the US on the Goodfellow World Tour.
52:00 Okay?
52:00 So, this is your last chance to see me in the States.
52:02 Okay?
52:02 Come on out.
52:03 It's going to be a good time.
52:03 All right?
52:03 That's it.
52:04 I would stick around, but unfortunately, I have to go.
52:06 Uh there's a very slow train about to hit me.
52:09 See you.