Trump Forgets His Presidential Terms While Claiming Other Candidates Need Cognitive Exams

0:01 -Good evening, everybody!

0:02 I'm Seth Meyers, this is "Late Night." We hope you're doing well.

0:04 And now, if you don't mind, we're gonna get to the news.

0:06 President Trump said in a post last week on Truth Social that anyone

0:10 running for president should be required to take a cognitive exam and added,

0:14 "I took the exam three times during my three

0:17 terms as president and aced it all three times." So,

0:21 first of all, you can't ace a cognitive exam.

0:24 They're famously pass/fail.

0:25 And secondly, if you aced it, then I guess they didn't ask "how

0:30 many terms have you had as president?"[ Laughter]

0:33 President Trump complained about his first impeachment

0:36 in a post yesterday on Truth Social and said,

0:38 "I got impeached for a perfect phone call." I'll have to take your word for it.

0:42 That was so many impeachments ago, I don't even remember what it was for.

0:48 Here's the rule— if I made fun of you for it while wearing a suit,

0:52 it basically didn't happen.

0:54 Laughter] While speaking at a retirement community on Friday,

0:57 President Trump said that First Lady Melania Trump is a movie star now.

1:01 Oh, no.

1:01 That was actually about someone else.

1:04 Laughter] Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F Kennedy Jr.

1:08 has said in a post on social media

1:11 yesterday that he rescued a starling at Dulles Airport.

1:14 Then, he took it straight to the airport McDonald's to find some dipping sauce.

1:19 Laughter][ As RFK Jr.

1:24 A lot of people will tell you you can't eat starling,

1:26 but it's actually a delicious bird.

1:30 Laughter] Don't believe people who tell you not to eat...

1:35 a bird you catch in the airport.

1:37 Laughter] There are no red dyes.

1:41 Laughter][ Normal voice] President Trump attended

1:46 the PGA Tour Cadillac Championship at his Doral,

1:49 Miami Golf Club yesterday with his sons, Don Jr and Eric.

1:51 Said Trump, "I got two under par."[ Laughter][ Applause] Thank you.

2:00 Anyone...

2:01 Cheers and applause] If you got that right away, you passed your cognitive test.

2:08 Laughter] President Trump posted an image on Truth Social

2:11 on Friday that shows himself holding UNO cards with the caption,

2:17 "I have all the cards." Okay, but you know,

2:20 the point of UNO is to have none, right?

2:23 Laughter] That's like bragging you got the highest score in golf.

2:29 Applause][ As Donald Trump] Also,

2:33 I play with the big cards 'cause I'm old and I can't see good.

2:38 Normal voice] Well, if you had a Spirit

2:40 flight booked over the weekend, good news.

2:42 You were upgraded to not having one.

2:45 Laughter] That's right.

2:47 Spirit Airlines on Saturday ceased operations.

2:49 Oh, my God.

2:50 This is the worst news for my writers since they fixed LaGuardia.

2:54 Laughter] If the Mets start winning,

2:56 we might have to put them on a psychiatric hold.

3:00 Laughter] Amazon has reportedly discussed the possibility of rebooting

3:03 "The Apprentice" with Donald Trump Jr as host.

3:06 Airing right after the new "Bar Rescue."[ Laughter] And finally,

3:12 wildlife researchers in Florida have placed GPS collars on raccoons in an effort

3:17 to track Burmese pythons once they swallow the smaller animals whole.

3:23 Said one raccoon, "I'm sorry.

3:24 What's this for?"[ Laughter] "What?

3:31 Huh?" That was a monologue, everybody.

3:33 Here we go!

3:35 Cheers and applause] We got a great show for you tonight.

3:39 He's a wildly talented actor of all stages and screens.

3:43 You know him from shows such as "The Gilded Age," "Only Murders

3:46 in the Building," as well as classic

3:47 movies like "The Lion King," "The Birdcage,"

3:49 and "The Producers." He's back on Broadway as Willy Loman in "Death

3:53 of a Salesman," now playing at the Winter Garden here in New York City.

3:56 One of our favorites, Nathan Lane's back on the show, everybody.

3:58 Cheers and applause] How about that?

4:03 And he is an acclaimed musician and songwriter whose fourth album,

4:08 "The Great Divide," just debuted at number one on the Billboard

4:12 200 with the biggest streaming debut of the year.

4:14 His brand new documentary, "Noah Kahan: Out of Body," is on Netflix now.

4:18 He's on a massive stadium tour starting June 11th, and to cap it all off,

4:22 he returns as musical guest host this week on "SNL" with host Matt Damon.

4:25 Noah Khan is back, everybody!

4:27 Cheers and applause] So thrilled to talk to those two wonderful gentlemen.

4:32 Before we get to all that, oil and gas prices surged again on Monday

4:37 as a new poll showed Americans overwhelmingly oppose to the war in Iran,

4:40 which has already resulted in higher prices for almost

4:43 everything and the collapse of a major airline.

4:46 But don't worry, Donald Trump announced a plan to fix the situation by guiding

4:49 tankers through the Strait of Hormuz without sparking a new round of fighting.

4:54 And even though the details were vague and unclear, I'm sure it'll all work out,

4:57 and gas will be cheap again, and the war will be over,

4:59 and everyone will be happy, and wait,

5:00 hold on, I'm getting word the administration

5:02 has unveiled a new name for the mission.

5:03 Oh, it doesn't sound great.

5:05 Let's see.

5:05 What is it called?

5:06 Oh, no.

5:06 Operation Cluster[bleep]?

5:08 Laughter] Well, that's just bad marketing.

5:14 For more on this, it's time for "A Closer Look."[ Cheers

5:17 and applause] Donald Trump ran on three big priorities— bringing prices down,

5:25 ending foreign wars, and deporting violent criminals.

5:27 And as we all know, he's crushing it on all three.

5:29 There's no war in the Middle East, his immigration policies are a smash hit,

5:32 and groceries are so cheap they're paying us to take them!

5:36 Point is, everything's awesome,

5:37 which is why I was shocked when I saw the president's latest poll numbers.

5:40 -A record high that no one wants.

5:42 That is where President Trump's disapproval rating stands this morning.

5:46 A new Washington Post ABC News Ipsos poll

5:49 showing Trump's disapproval rating at a record 62%,

5:54 an all-time high for the survey's history.

5:57 ...President Trump's numbers souring over inflation

5:59 and cost of living as the average

6:02 price of gas now reaches $4.46 a gallon across the country,

6:06 that's nearly $1.50 more per gallon since the start of the war with Iran.

6:11 -Trump's disapproval is at an all-time high,

6:13 higher than COVID and January 6th— a virus and a riot.

6:18 That's how much people hate high gas prices.

6:20 Trump could release an army of bats infected with COVID to attack the Capitol,

6:24 to fly away with Ted Cruz, but if gas prices were under two bucks,

6:28 voters would be like, "Hey, it could be worse.

6:31 He loves to travel."[ Laughter] So,

6:34 Trump's disapproval is at an all-time high of 62%.

6:37 But I just have a quick question for the 37% who approve.

6:44 Look, I get that, like, you're MAGA, but like, what do you actually approve of?

6:48 Is it worth it for you to pay high gas

6:51 prices if it means liberals also pay high gas prices?

6:54 Is that how much you want to own the libs— at the cost of owning thyself?

6:59 Laughter] I mean, seriously, what's left?

7:01 The dancing?

7:01 Is that what you like?

7:02 Because the dancing is the next to go.

7:04 Have you seen how tired he is?

7:07 He barely...

7:07 has the energy to get through a meeting in the Oval Office.

7:09 Dude always looks like my kids when I'm on the last

7:12 few pages of "Goodnight Moon."[ Laughter] Seriously, what's your deal?

7:15 Do you like the corruption?

7:17 The wars?

7:17 Oh, do you like his beautiful poetry?

7:19 -Nothing bad can happen.

7:21 It can only good happen.

7:23 Laughter] -Does that resonate with you?

7:25 'Cause I'm pretty sure he got

7:26 that from a fortune cookie written by Frankenstein.

7:30 Laughter] -This has been "What's your Deal?" -Anyway,

7:34 Trump's disapproval is at an all-time high,

7:36 which is why Republicans have given up on persuading voters

7:38 and moved on to a new strategy of rewriting election rules.

7:42 -President Trump is calling for elections to be thrown out

7:44 and redone in the wake of last week's Supreme Court

7:47 decision to strike down one of Louisiana's majority Black congressional

7:50 districts that dealt a severe blow to the Voting Rights Act.

7:53 -Republicans are now pushing several states across the South

7:57 to redraw their congressional maps before November's midterm elections.

8:01 So, Republicans overnight in Florida passed a new congressional map

8:04 that would allow Republicans to gain four seats in the midterms.

8:07 South Carolina, Tennessee,

8:08 and Missouri could try to redraw their maps before voting begins, too.

8:12 -When the Democrats have the chance, they will end the filibuster.

8:16 They want to turn America into a one-party nation.

8:18 They'll pack the Supreme Court.

8:20 They'll, you know, turn DC, Puerto Rico into, uh, into states.

8:24 They will nationalize our elections, automatic registration, mail-in balloting.

8:28 So, we need to stop them.

8:30 -That's your nightmare scenario?

8:32 Automatic voter registration?

8:33 That sounds awesome.

8:34 It shouldn't be harder to vote than it is to gamble on sports.

8:37 And yet, to register to vote,

8:38 you have to fill out a six-part form with your DMV number, proof of residency.

8:42 But to gamble on sports, all you have to do is open your phone,

8:44 wait for a notification from FanDuel, and be willing to get divorced.

8:48 Laughter] And should anyone run into my wife,

8:50 the Kentucky Derby is next week, okay?!

8:53 Don't you dare tell her the race happened already!

8:56 You let her enjoy her Mother's Day!

8:58 It's her last one before we have to sell the kids.

9:02 So, Republicans want to redraw congressional maps

9:04 and pass restrictive new voter ID laws,

9:06 but they can't even explain those laws in a way that makes sense.

9:10 -There's a lot of things that we can be doing, like voter ID,

9:14 like every time you walk into a restaurant or a club, you have to show your ID.

9:18 -No, you don't.

9:19 Laughter] You have to show your ID to buy alcohol,

9:22 but not to walk into a restaurant.

9:24 They don't card you at the door at Outback Steakhouse.

9:27 Although, personally, I think you should have to be over 18

9:30 to eat a Blooming Onion because it is better than sex!

9:34 Oh, man, it is so good to say that out loud finally.

9:36 You know, after they said it was too weird to be a subway take.

9:41 Also, there are plenty of restaurants that don't

9:43 even serve alcohol, much to my dismay.

9:45 You know how many times I've walked into a Friendly's

9:47 and asked for a shot of bourbon in my Fribble?

9:50 Hey, don't judge me.

9:51 If you were there with two boys and their friends

9:52 arguing over whether fire Pokemon are more valuable than water Pokemon,

9:56 you'd want bourbon in your Fribble, too!

9:58 Laughter] Point is, Republicans are reeling from bad

10:01 poll numbers on the Iran war and the economy,

10:03 a situation that's so bad it's toppling major airlines.

10:05 -Breaking news this morning,

10:07 Spirit Airlines is announcing it's shutting down the ultra-low-cost airline,

10:10 making the announcement early this morning

10:12 saying all flights have been canceled, telling guests to not go to the airport.

10:17 -After 34 years, Spirit Airlines is no more,

10:20 posting a message overnight that it was ceasing operations,

10:23 all flights canceled, and there is no customer service.

10:26 So, if you're holding a ticket, you will have to reach out to other airlines.

10:29 -The airline's parent company is saying it has already,

10:32 "started an orderly wind down of operations,

10:35 effective immediately." -Only Spirit could cancel all

10:38 flights and tell customers not to come

10:40 to the airport and also describe it as "an orderly wind down." But you know,

10:45 compared to a normal Spirit flight, that kind of is orderly.

10:48 Laughter] Spirit flights, God bless 'em, were chaos,

10:51 running down the jetway to get a seat and overhead space was

10:54 like racing through an obstacle course

10:55 on "Wipeout."[ Laughter] Here's the thing, though.

10:59 We make plenty of jokes about Spirit on this show.

11:04 Laughter] But it was a budget airline that employed

11:07 17,000 people and made flying affordable for millions more.

11:10 But now, it's out of business due to high fuel costs

11:12 caused by the Iran war— or as Trump put it recently, Obama.

11:16 -Spirit is...

11:18 uh...

11:20 ...an airline that's had some trouble.

11:22 They were going to merge with People Express

11:25 or one of them a number of years ago,

11:28 and Barack Hussein Obama decided it was a bad idea.

11:31 How did that work out?

11:32 -Yes, we all remember when Obama

11:35 stopped Spirit from merging with People Express,

11:38 an airline that ceased operations in 1987.

11:42 Laughter][ Applause] Which— which...

11:46 Which makes sense when you realize Trump's brain also ceased operations in 1987.

11:52 Cheers and applause][ As Donald Trump] Spirit...

11:54 You know Spirit.

11:56 Spirit was gonna merge with People Express, and then, when that fell through,

12:00 they almost had to deal with Panda Express, which made sense because...

12:03 Laughter] ...Panda Express is already at the airport

12:06 and who wouldn't get excited about a panda pilot?

12:09 Laughter] Beautiful panda bear with a little pilot's cap.

12:12 But Obama said no because Obama hates fun.

12:15 Laughter][ Normal voice] Also,

12:17 a good bellwether as to how much [bleep] Trump is dealing

12:19 is if he's using the Hussein middle name in Barack Obama.

12:23 He's so bummed Joe Biden didn't have

12:25 a foreign-sounding middle name he could lean on.

12:27 Although, Joe Biden's real middle name is Robinette,

12:30 and I'm kind of surprised Trump never used that.

12:32 You know...

12:33 As Donald Trump] The country is a bank and Joe Biden is robbin' it.

12:35 [Robinette][ Laughter] Joe Robinette Biden!

12:40 Normal voice] Over the weekend,

12:41 Trump officials were asked about the collapse of Spirit and said,

12:43 "Don't worry, you guys, don't worry.

12:44 There are still other airlines." -In this statement Spirit

12:48 released explaining why they were shutting down, they said,

12:50 "the sudden and sustained rise in fuel prices in recent weeks ultimately has

12:56 left us with no alternative." Are other industries also at risk of collapse,

13:01 or other major companies, due to this energy shock?

13:06 -Well, don't forget that Spirit Airlines was chapter 11 twice

13:11 because they basically didn't have a business model that was working.

13:15 -I acknowledge that.

13:15 -That's right, and the other airlines are still operating.

13:18 I just flew out here to discuss these matters at the Milken Conference in LA,

13:22 you know, on United Airlines.

13:24 And you know, the other airlines are operating.

13:27 -That doesn't make it better.

13:28 If a restaurant in your neighborhood burns down,

13:29 the fire department doesn't say, "Relax, there's a Chili's down the block.

13:32 Just..."[ Laughter] "...bring your ID because eating

13:35 those baby back ribs is basically [bleep]."[ Laughter] So,

13:39 Trump's Iran war is spiking fuel prices and destroying airlines.

13:43 Can you at least tell us how long this war will last,

13:46 or if it's even a war at all?

13:49 -You said the blockade is still on.

13:50 A blockade is an act of war.

13:52 Are we at war with Iran?

13:55 -Iran shut down the straits.

13:57 Iran shut down the straits,

13:58 and the only ones they were letting through were Iranian ships.

14:03 And President Trump didn't think that was acceptable.

14:05 -So, we are still at war with Iran.

14:09 Laughter] -You know...

14:11 Stammers] I don't know what the definition of war

14:13 is when we're not shooting and we're negotiating.

14:16 -You don't know what the definition

14:17 of war— Did Merriam-Webster also go bankrupt?

14:21 Also, the answer is yes, we're at war!

14:23 A blockade is an act of war.

14:25 If I park my car in front of my neighbor's

14:27 driveway and refuse to let him in or out,

14:28 that's an act of war against my neighbor.

14:30 And I will admit I did that once,

14:32 but only because I had one too many bourbon Fribbles.

14:35 Laughter] So, now, a major airline has collapsed due to rising

14:39 fuel costs caused by an unpopular war started by Donald Trump.

14:42 Which means, of course,

14:43 and I know you're all thinking this, so say it with me— it's Joe Biden's fault.

14:47 Alright, nobody said it.

14:49 Laughter] -Spirit tried to merge with JetBlue.

14:52 The Joe Biden-Pete Buttigieg administration and DOJ tanked that deal.

14:56 Immediately after that, they filed for bankruptcy.

14:58 They were having financial problems, Martha.

15:00 They filed for bankruptcy again last year.

15:02 They were bleeding money.

15:04 And so, this was in the works for some time.

15:07 -Spirit Airlines closed operations.

15:10 The Treasury was supposed to be doing a deal to save this company.

15:15 Can you tell us what happened?

15:17 -Uh, sure, Maria.

15:18 So, this is just more of the mess we inherited from the Biden administration.

15:23 -"Maria, it's just more of the mess we inherited from the Biden administration.

15:26 I'm so angry I can't even open my mouth.

15:30 Maria, my jaw is permanently clenched because of how outraged I am about

15:34 Joe Biden causing the collapse of Spirit

15:36 Airlines 15 months after he left office.

15:38 That's why I talk like I just ate a jar of peanut butter mixed with sand."[

15:42 Laughter] You guys can blame Joe Biden for the collapse of Spirit all you want.

15:45 No one's buying it.

15:47 Mainly because Joe Biden wasn't an airplane guy.

15:48 He was a train guy.

15:49 We all know that.

15:50 As Joe Biden] Uh, no, joke, I was best friends with Jesse James, yeah.

15:54 That's how I got my middle name.

15:55 I told Jesse "When I see a train, Jesse...

15:59 "Jesse, when I see a train..."[ Laughter] "I'm robbing it."[ Laughter] "I'm not

16:05 kidding around."[ Normal voice] Trump's desperate for a way out of this mess,

16:08 which is why he keeps announcing new fake solutions to the crisis

16:11 he started that don't make sense and catch everyone off guard.

16:14 -President Trump announces Project Freedom,

16:16 a US military plan starting today that will offer what's being described

16:20 as a defensive umbrella to help cargo ships pass safely through the strait.

16:33 -Well, it's a very friendly blockade.

16:35 -A friendly—[ Laughter] A friendly block— Is there such a thing?

16:40 I mean, what would you even call a friendly bl— Oh, a Fribble.

16:43 It's a...

16:44 Laughter][ As Donald Trump] It's a friendly blockade.

16:45 A Fribble, if you will.

16:47 Normal voice] "Friendly blockade" sounds like slang for when a girl at a bar

16:50 needs a friend to come over and get her away from an annoying guy.

17:00 But you heard him!

17:01 Financial markets, it's a friendly blockade, everything's chill.

17:03 Tankers should start going through the Strait

17:05 of Hormuz without issue any minute now.

17:07 Now, we all just sit back and watch gas prices plummet.

17:10 -The ceasefire between the United States and Iran under strain right now

17:14 as we've learned that both sides have traded shots in the Strait of Hormuz.

17:18 It began after the US began guiding vessels through the waterway,

17:22 including two US flag commercial ships.

17:25 In response, US Central Command says

17:26 that Tehran launched multiple cruise missiles, drones, and small boats.

17:30 The US says it's blown up at least six of those Iranian small boats.

17:34 -I spoke with President Trump for 20 minutes about the situation with Iran.

17:38 He talked about Project Freedom and the US

17:41 efforts to guide vessels through the Strait of Hormuz,

17:44 issuing a new warning to the Iranian regime,

17:46 saying if the Iranians try to target US ships in this area,

17:50 they will be "blown off the face

17:52 of the Earth." -What happened to the friendly blockade?!

17:55 Laughter] Trump's dumb plan went south faster than Spirit Airlines.

17:59 Although, is that the solution?

18:01 We just send a bunch of decommissioned Spirit planes to the strait,

18:03 load 'em up with oil, and see what happens?

18:06 Laughter] Trump got himself into this mess thinking it'd be quick and easy,

18:09 and now he's spiraling.

18:10 He can't get himself out of it.

18:11 Americans are overwhelmingly against it.

18:13 If the election were held today,

18:14 it's very likely voters would send Trump packing

18:17 with a one-way ticket on his favorite functioning airline...

18:20 -People Express.

18:21 -This has been "A Closer Look."[ Cheers and applause]